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lostalex · 01-02-2014, 07:53 AM

I'm 32 and i still haven't figured out being a teenager yet.

I see my fellow men in their 30's and they look old to me, so i know I must be old too. That's the only way I know that I am old.

When I look in the mirror I only see my eyes, though, I still look young in the mirror. I must be hugely egotistical, because I still see the same face i saw 10 years ago.

Also because of all the drugs, and alcohol and smoking, I know I will probably only live to about 60, so 30 for me is really middle aged. I don't expect to live a long life.

x-evenstar-x · 01-02-2014, 08:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lostalex

I'm 32 and i still haven't figured out being a teenager yet.

I see my fellow men in their 30's and they look old to me, so i know I must be old too. That's the only way I know that I am old.

When I look in the mirror I only see my eyes, though, I still look young in the mirror. I must be hugely egotistical, because I still see the same face i saw 10 years ago.

Also because of all the drugs, and alcohol and smoking, I know I will probably only live to about 60, so 30 for me is really middle aged. I don't expect to live a long life.

That's so sad, why not stop drugs, drinking and smoking?

lostalex · 01-02-2014, 08:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by x-evenstar-x

That's so sad, why not stop drugs, drinking and smoking?

I'm trying. But you know how addiction is, your brain tells you, well the damage is done, just enjoy the time you have left. etc etc,

It's difficult, you know? and i don't have a family yet,. If i had a family i would quit everything this instant for them. I wish so much for a family.

thesheriff443 · 01-02-2014, 08:32 AM

in years gone by, yawn, your age would be used as goals of where you should be in your life, they also say men don't grow up until they are 30.

if you see life as only killing time it will kill you right back.
age is just a number and as we are living longer and are doing more, the age mold has been broken

lostalex · 01-02-2014, 08:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by thesheriff443

in years gone by, yawn, your age would be used as goals of where you should be in your life, they also say men don't grow up until they are 30.

if you see life as only killing time it will kill you right back.
age is just a number and as we are living longer and are doing more, the age mold has been broken

It's hard to see the forrest amongst the trees though.

thesheriff443 · 01-02-2014, 08:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lostalex

I'm trying. But you know how addiction is, your brain tells you, well the damage is done, just enjoy the time you have left. etc etc,

It's difficult, you know? and i don't have a family yet,. If i had a family i would quit everything this instant for them. I wish so much for a family.

to be cruel to be kind alex, a family would not make you give up your life style of drink and drugs.

thesheriff443 · 01-02-2014, 08:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lostalex

It's hard to see the forrest amongst the trees though.

then get a chain saw and cut them down.

lostalex · 01-02-2014, 08:36 AM

My biggest p;problem is that I am just reacting to everything happening, i feel like i am always trying to react, and catch up. I feel like I can't catch my breath. I'm too busy averting the next disaster to plan for something greater.

I'm too busy doing damage control to actually plan something great for myself. That's how it feels.

I just want to catch my breath.

Youtube video

thesheriff443 · 01-02-2014, 08:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lostalex

My biggest p;problem is that I am just reacting to everything happening, i feel like i am always trying to react, and catch up. I feel like I can't catch my breath. I'm too busy averting the next disaster to plan for something greater.

I'm too busy doing damage control to actually plan something great for myself. That's how it feels.

I just want to catch my breath.

Youtube video

only you can break that cycle, its like your borrowing money to pay a debt and by borrowing that money you have got another debt that needs paying.

AnnieK · 01-02-2014, 09:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by thesheriff443

to be cruel to be kind alex, a family would not make you give up your life style of drink and drugs.

I don't know...I stopped smoking and rarely drink now. Drugs are a long time ago in my past but I hope I would have quit everything for my son

lostalex · 01-02-2014, 09:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by thesheriff443

to be cruel to be kind alex, a family would not make you give up your life style of drink and drugs.

I gave up the drugs a long time ago(2005), and all of the toxic people that went along with them.

That's why i'm alone now...

My social group when i was young was built around getting ****ed up and using together, and after i got clean, i basically never learned how to find friends without drugs. It's very lonely. I think i missed out on a lot of normal social relationships because of my drug use, and i still don't really understand how to relate to people without that crutch.

It was so much easier to relate to people when you are using, no one has taught me how to make relationships without having that community. It's especially hard being gay. Where do you meet normal sober gay people? A glee club?

thesheriff443 · 01-02-2014, 10:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AnnieK

I don't know...I stopped smoking and rarely drink now. Drugs are a long time ago in my past but I hope I would have quit everything for my son

some can, but when someone says they would give it up, it all depends on how much of a hold their addiction has on them.

I find those that can do, those that cant talk about giving up.

thesheriff443 · 01-02-2014, 10:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lostalex

I gave up the drugs a long time ago(2005), and all of the toxic people that went along with them.

That's why i'm alone now...

My social group when i was young was built around getting ****ed up and using together, and after i got clean, i basically never learned how to find friends without drugs. It's very lonely. I think i missed out on a lot of normal social relationships because of my drug use, and i still don't really understand how to relate to people without that crutch.

It was so much easier to relate to people when you are using, no one has taught me how to make relationships without having that community. It's especially hard being gay. Where do you meet normal sober gay people? A glee club?

I think you just need to mix with nice people in general,

Niamh. · 01-02-2014, 11:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Benjamin

Baldness doesn't run my family

Did your mothers dad have hair?

x-evenstar-x · 01-02-2014, 11:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lostalex

I'm trying. But you know how addiction is, your brain tells you, well the damage is done, just enjoy the time you have left. etc etc,

It's difficult, you know? and i don't have a family yet,. If i had a family i would quit everything this instant for them. I wish so much for a family.

Yeah I have that issue with cakes!

You could have a family one day! There's someone out there for everyone!

InOne · 01-02-2014, 11:39 AM

Almost all my cousins are in their 30's and apart from them being a bit more settled than me relationship wise they're pretty much just the same as me when it comes to social events and that. I don't think about age often at all.

Cherie · 01-02-2014, 11:49 AM

I think 30 is a bigger milestone for women due to that pesky biological clock, other than that it is just another birthday

Z · 01-02-2014, 11:56 AM

I think 30 is one of those birthdays where you have an irrational breakdown because it's a round number, same happens at 40, 50, 60 etc. You're still a young person when you're 30. Perhaps at that age you'll have an idea of how you want the rest of your life to pan out, perhaps you won't - if you didn't know what you wanted to be when you grew up when you were 10 then why should you have it all worked out when you're 30? It's just a number. You're still young, you don't have to be tied down to paying a mortgage, starting a family and having a steady job, the world is yours to go and explore. My brother's almost 35 and I don't think of him as an old person, he's married but they live in a nice flat and go on holiday 2-3 times a year because they don't fancy having kids and that's exactly how I'd like to be when I'm in my 30s, just doing what I want to do and not creating obligations for myself if I don't need to have them.