[waterhog]

Michael's comment about Gemma ? is he a berk or is the only way south ? 20.11.14

what a fantastic series tremor
only one bit of fungal
and now the "walker" is Gemma
better then ever will be the jungle.
the variety is a pleasure
not talking about any cockroach or spider
the relationships are a treasure
i adore the Buerk and the Stryder.
together is coming the team
like Craig and Nadia
she was helping like a bad dream
as helpful to Gemma with her diagnoses of malaria.
was it the right save
did the majority waste
i hope this is a Gemma final wave
because like "towne" she is a vile taste.
now to end with the comment from the Buerk
"a reality TV star unable to perform"
Michael you did make me smirk
your outspoken attitude in my eyes went down a storm.

( he may well be BBC through and through but you have to have respect him for this. a lovely gentleman well mannered and a perfect gent. who are you liking so far ? eyes on Nadia as well. and i am not ruling out dislike for Kendra as she is growing on me. no proposal poem just yet but watch this space. if you have any comment to make - i would be grateful if it could rhyme.)

[kirklancaster]

Originally Posted by waterhog

Michael's comment about Gemma ? is he a berk or is the only way south ? 20.11.14

if you have any comment to make - i would be grateful if it could rhyme.)

Great thoughts again WaterHog
All put down in rhyme.
You manage to do it time after time.

You wanted rhyming replies
(why on Earth I don’t know)
But ‘cos I like you, I’ve give it a go:

THE BALLAD OF GEMMA COLLINS (Or Why There's Still No Cure For Moby Dick)

Gemma fell asleep on the beach at Southend
A nice man woke her up with a grin
Excuse me he said, his face turning red,
Can yer move so the tide can come in?

“Do You Know Who I am?” She angrily declared.
"People like you make me sick.
I’m not fecking daft, so don’t you dare laugh,
I’m the pig who built my house of brick".

"Oh Dear, I apologise" said the nice man
I didn’t mean to say you were thick
"And I could see you were big, but didn’t think you a pig
More a beached whale called Moby Dick".

“I’m famous” she said as she got to her feet
“And I’ve been on the telly real proper”
He said “By flipping heck! You were with Ant and Dec,
The only time yer wouldn’t ride a big chopper”

“Yeah, I was” she agreed “But that show’s bugger all”
It’s on TOWIE where I’m a big star.”
He stifled a snigger and said “They don’t come much bigger”
“But a ‘Star' dear, is going too far “.

“Anyway love” the nice man said, “Tide’s coming in,
And I thought it best you be knowing “
“Yer can stay here and drown, or to be safe and sound
Take my arm and let’s both be going”.

Well, Gemma refused and lay back down on the sand
Beached whale style like Moby Dick or Orca,
And sadly she floated, all swollen and bloated
And is now an island off the coast of Majorca!

Boom! Boom!

All The Best WaterHog - Keep writing.

[waterhog]

that made me crack up - i am going to island gemma to write my next poem. want a holiday kirk ?