[Riz]

Saturday 20 January
Day 18, 10:56
Toilet habits come under Dirk's scrutiny...
Dirk's woken up in manly spirits today.


Earlier he was happily boasting about how not showering was boosting his masculinity. And now he's volunteering to inspect everyone's poop. What a guy.

It all began quite innocently, with Jo and Danielle complaining that bog-roll supplies were running low. But it was the only nudge Dirk needed to start talking about his second favourite subject. His first favourite is chopping wood, but this was a different kind of logging.

"Someone uses too much toilet paper," he said. "I'm going to come in and start monitoring."

"You can give people four squares," said Cleo.

"Shall we have a lesson on how much toilet paper you should use?" he offered.

"I think that's a lesson we could all do with. Don't you? Kids?" said Cleo.

"I think it depends on the size of the s***," piped up Jo, getting to the crux of the matter.

"It's got to do with texture, buoyancy, colour," continued Dirk.

"That is gross," said a disgusted Danielle.

But Dirk looked as excited as Gillian McKeith with a fresh delivery. "Tomorrow morning, everyone show me their stool. And I will be able to tell you what is out of balance in your diet. I'll be the stool man, the stool pigeon, the stool checker."

"Do you like poo?" asked Danielle, worriedly as he gave them the turd degree.

"The stool guy will come running," continued doctor Dirk. "More salt, too much fruit."

That'll have them dumping for joy..

EDIT: http://www.channel4.com/bigbrother/n...ry.jsp?id=1318

[stacey]

ewww

[Riz]

i knowwww

[Crystal-Rose]

[Sophii3x]

Ewwww

[Riz]

i know he must reeeek

[Hippy]

Hehehe lovely!

[Nowhere]

lol! Good ol' Dirk. Never fails to entertain!!

[arista]

Yes but Up to Date
Dirk is Angry
and spent a hour in the Diary room
because he stated smoking in the house after
Cleo teased him.

http://www.thisisbigbrother.com/foru....php?tid=54539

[Nowhere]

He's in the Diary Room because he smoked in the house? Is that an unwritten rule that I missed?

[arista]

Originally posted by Nowhere
He's in the Diary Room because he smoked in the house? Is that an unwritten rule that I missed?

Yes he was in it getting Told Off,
but he would then say Cleo forced him to.

He came out and has not said a word
a warning to him - at this time, does not mean anything,
Endemol spent the hour making him stay.

[Nowhere]

Originally posted by arista

Yes he was in it getting Told Off,
but he would then say Cleo forced him to.

He came out and has not said a word
a warning to him - at this time, does not mean anything,
Endemol spent the hour making him stay.

I didn't know he wasn't allowed to smoke in the house. He smoke indoors in the HND..

[arista]

Cleo will not wind Dirk up any more
dur to Jermaine saying 3AM would upset him as well.

So vote Jermaine out
then Cleo will wind Dirk up so much
he may attack one of them.


And give Jo a drink
because she said she will cut up his cigars.


Now there is a Story.

[arista]

Not in the Bedroom.
No smoking.

[CJ4Life]

I dont want Dirk and Cleo to fall out. I remember their first meeting:

Dirk: "Do you want to come to my bedroom and look at my pictures?"

[Nowhere]

I think Tiara may be taking it a little far,afterall Dirk's a laid back guy. In that cramped small space, where they all to have to live, things can become magnified.
Anyway I'll tune into the Live Feed in a bit, see what's going on.

[CJ4Life]

They're all eating dinner.

Nowhere, you really have to stick to this board for the reliablity of what is going on in that house. Don't go to D/S because they over emphasise things beyond the facts.

[Nowhere]

Originally posted by CJ4Life
They're all eating dinner.

Nowhere, you really have to stick to this board for the reliablity of what is going on in that house. Don't go to D/S because they over emphasise things beyond the facts.

I don't go to DS, I get my info from here, and the Live Feed. What makes you say that anyhoo?

[arista]

They will get a Food Budget Task soon,
I wonder if Dirk will talk or walk?

[Psylocke]

Originally posted by rakashmiri


But Dirk looked as excited as Gillian McKeith with a fresh delivery.

That made me fall off my chair laughing LMAO!!!!!

[Bells]

Erm, ew.

[Nowhere]

Lol!

[Bells]

I think he was just trying to be funny/entertaining and sarcastic which Dirk does best sometimes, rather than ACTUALLY having an obsession...with poo.

[arista]

Dirk is in the Garden Talking with jermaine & ian.

[Sasha]

Ewwwww he is a bhuda