[Mystic Mock]

The adult who's say 22 years old gives the 14 year old a kiss on the cheek to boost their confidence, should this be classed as a form of grooming or not? Because the 22 year old would know about the 14 year old having a crush on them and it could be seen as encouraging the crush, but obviously they've not had sex with the 14 year old either so it's a bit tricky I think.

I know it's a weird thread, I was just interested to get people's responses to this as it happens more often than people realise and I don't know how people feel about it in general.

[T*]

I guess it's wrong tho

[Jamie89]

Originally Posted by Mystic Mock

The adult who's say 22 years old gives the 14 year old a kiss on the cheek to boost their confidence, should this be classed as a form of grooming or not? Because the 22 year old would know about the 14 year old having a crush on them and it could be seen as encouraging the crush, but obviously they've not had sex with the 14 year old either so it's a bit tricky I think.

I know it's a weird thread, I was just interested to get people's responses to this as it happens more often than people realise and I don't know how people feel about it in general.

To boost their confidence how? Sexually? It just strikes me as a very weird scenario. It's basically an adult teasing a child in a semi sexual way (I know kissing on the cheek isn't technically sexual but to a 14 year old it could be perceived as being far more intimate/meaningful than an adult would perceive it). I don't know whether it would be classed as 'grooming' but it's certainly wrong as it's encouraging them and you'd have to wonder why the adult in that situation would want to do that.

[Jordan.]

Yeah this is creepy af, an adult shouldn't kiss a child unless they're family.

I wouldn't think it happens often either

[user104658]

I wouldn't say it's ideal but realistically, it's probably not harmful either.

[user104658]

Oh and I would also point out, if it was a female in her 20's (say a pop star or other celebrity) and a 14 year old boy, no one would find it creepy / grooming at all... E.g. Cheryl Cole on her first stint on the x factor was always "joke flirting" with the teenage boys, all encouraged by the other panel members, etc.

[Crimson Dynamo]

Mock I presume they are brother and sister?

[Cherie]

Mock the 22 year old has good intentions ie boosting confidence ..that said the 22 year old knows the 14 year old has a crush on them so should keep a distance physically, a peck on the cheek is probably okayish as long as the 14 year old doesn't get the wrong idea and it's not a regular thing

[Mystic Mock]

Originally Posted by LeatherTrumpet

Mock I presume they are brother and sister?

Nope I was thinking of two friends.

[joeysteele]

If the older person knows the younger one and underage person has a crush on them, then they would be well advised to not make any physical contact.

Even as with Teachers now, if a child is in distress, it could be construed badly if they hug them or sit any length of time with their arms round them..

The sad thing is in your scenario, no I would not call that grooming or even inappropriate,however it could be taken the wrong way by someone who has a crush on the older person and taken as an invite to maybe pursue more.

Best to avoid any physical contact nowadays as trouble can be a very short way off even in the most innocent scenarios if more is looked for, either by the older person or the younger.

For me in your scenario,I see nothing really wrong as to a kiss on the cheek as to encouragement myself but I can see how things could get difficult because one has a crush on the other.

It is unfortunate that someone 22 to someone 14 would seem really wrong as to any physical contact, yet 28 to 20,no one would bat eyelid.
If it was no more than a general hug or kiss on the cheek,I see nothing wrong at all as to that myself.
However I also myself would avoid absolutely no question, ever doing more than just maybe shaking hands with someone under 16.

[Marsh.]

Jesus H Christ!

[Shaun]

Originally Posted by Toy Soldier

Oh and I would also point out, if it was a female in her 20's (say a pop star or other celebrity) and a 14 year old boy, no one would find it creepy / grooming at all... E.g. Cheryl Cole on her first stint on the x factor was always "joke flirting" with the teenage boys, all encouraged by the other panel members, etc.

And now she's dating one of them, so maybe she isn't the best example of a non-creep

[Kizzy]

Originally Posted by Shaun

And now she's dating one of them, so maybe she isn't the best example of a non-creep

Personally I wouldn't even give the peck on the cheek it could build the hopes of the teen that there is some reciprocation. It would also sound bad to the parents should they ask 'has he kissed you'? to which the answer is yes, however innocent it was.

[user104658]

Originally Posted by Shaun

And now she's dating one of them, so maybe she isn't the best example of a non-creep

That's true. Cheryl tweedy, Cheryl Cole, Cheryl Fernandez-Versini... ... Cheryl Saville.

[DemolitionRed]

It depends...if this person pecks everyone on the cheek as a greeting, then leaving this one person out would appear to be disregarding that person.

[Nedusa]

Originally Posted by Mystic Mock

The adult who's say 22 years old gives the 14 year old a kiss on the cheek to boost their confidence, should this be classed as a form of grooming or not? Because the 22 year old would know about the 14 year old having a crush on them and it could be seen as encouraging the crush, but obviously they've not had sex with the 14 year old either so it's a bit tricky I think.

I know it's a weird thread, I was just interested to get people's responses to this as it happens more often than people realise and I don't know how people feel about it in general.

This person has acted inappropriately and should be warned by the school that this behaviour will not be tolerated in future.

That's all that is required on this occasion, no more serious action is necessary . Over reacting by suspending the teacher or holding an enquiry is a knee jerk reaction to what might have been an innocent mistake.

[Cherie]

Originally Posted by DemolitionRed

It depends...if this person pecks everyone on the cheek as a greeting, then leaving this one person out would appear to be disregarding that person.

True

Originally Posted by Nedusa

This person has acted inappropriately and should be warned by the school that this behaviour will not be tolerated in future.

That's all that is required on this occasion, no more serious action is necessary . Over reacting by suspending the teacher or holding an enquiry is a knee jerk reaction to what might have been an innocent mistake.

I don't think any teachers were harmed in this scenario

[arista]

Originally Posted by Mystic Mock

The adult who's say 22 years old gives the 14 year old a kiss on the cheek to boost their confidence, should this be classed as a form of grooming or not? Because the 22 year old would know about the 14 year old having a crush on them and it could be seen as encouraging the crush, but obviously they've not had sex with the 14 year old either so it's a bit tricky I think.

I know it's a weird thread, I was just interested to get people's responses to this as it happens more often than people realise and I don't know how people feel about it in general.

No a Kiss like that will Hook the young lad.
Out of order Bitch


Suspend Her


You Must Draw a Line on this


So many young women teachers
have had sex with 14 - 15 year old boys (UK and USA)
and unlike a Male teachers
Get away with it

[Cherie]

I'm confused

[DemolitionRed]

Originally Posted by Cherie

I'm confused

Me too! Are we now saying this is a teacher kissing a student

[Kizzy]

Scenario to victim blaming in under 20 posts.. that's got to be a tibb record?

[arista]

Originally Posted by Cherie

I'm confused

It start with a kiss on the cheek
then it goes further

Thats all we are talking about
Lady Cherie

[DemolitionRed]

Originally Posted by arista

It start with a kiss on the cheek
then it goes further

Thats all we are talking about
Lady Cherie

MM was talking about a friend, not a teacher.

[arista]

Originally Posted by DemolitionRed

MM was talking about a friend, not a teacher.

OK DR


the same applys
If the young woman takes it further
than just the kiss
then its illegal.


Sorry for my attack on teacher women

[AnnieK]

It's a fine line I guess, a kiss on the cheek is harmless and could be a confidence booster but some 14 year olds may read more into it than was intended? I feel it's quite sad though that a harmless kiss from an adult has to be scrutinised now and everything that comes out of someone's mouth can be read wrongly and become a big issue