[Stu xxx]

Just four days to go! But are you ready?

Sit for awhile and think to yourself are you seriously ready for Big Brother? There are a few things that I have decided are completly essential as a Big Brother fan to get prepared.

1. Cancel all fourthcoming Friday evening plans

2. Make sure that there is ALWAYS a spare video tape avalible to record essential moments

3. Make sure that you either a) set the tape before you go out on a weekday night or b) there is someone RELIBLE to record the show for you (This DOES NOT include Friday nights as you should always be in!)

4. Make sure that you have E4 - subscribe to digital - TRUST me it's worth the money!

5. Set up either a bed in the lounge or have a Television in your room so you can fall asleep and wake up to Big Brother

6. Have a list of excuses to tell mates or relatives at hand if they want you to go out. These could include - "I have a slight phobia to daylight" or "I'm seeing some other friends tonight sorry!" - Be brutal it is worth it in the long run

7. Under NO circumstances are you to have friends round who do not appriciate Big Brother in the same way when the daily show is on! They will talk and distract you from the main focus in the room!

8. Make sure you have another tape avalible to tape other essential programmes such as Eastenders, Coronation Street, Friends, Buffy e.t.c and then watch them at nightime when the housemates SHOULD be asleep

9. Have you got enough coffee in the house? I'm sure you haven't so purchase some! I recommend a strong black coffee every hour through the night with lots of sugar - even if you feel it's not worth it

10. Make sure that you allocate at least two hours minimum to the internet everyday. Half an Hour to browse the Official Big Brother site and another to talk in the TIBB forum as well as looking through the rest of the site

11. Plan a meeting with your family to make sure that they all understand that the next 64 days are going to be VERY important to you and that they should NEVER forget this

12. Mentally preper yourself that there is the strong possiblity that will be a housemate that you either dislike or totally hate in the house. To help you with this place pictures of Osma Bin Laden, Sadam Houssen, Hitler, Yorkshire Ripper or whoever makes your blood curl into a little book that you can look at whenever a housemate annoys you so that you remember that there are worse people in the world! Don't let it ruin your Big Brother 2003 experience!

and most importantly...

13. MAKE SURE YOUR TELEVISION IS IN COMPLETE WORKING ORDER! Get it serviced as soon as poss or make sure a back up is close at hand!

DO THEM NOW - YOU OWE IT TO BIG BROTHER AND MORE IMPORTANTLY YOURSELF!

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