[MB.]

Now with 100% less transphobia!

[you may have noticed that graphic design is not my passion]

With season 10 of Drag Race having just launched, and with the drama surrounding the riggory, tomfoolery and straight up buffoonery of All Stars 3 still lingering in the air like the scent of Kenney Davenport's puss, I figured it might be fun to run our own version, in which you get to choose (more or less) everything that happens. That’s right, you’ll have control of every twist, tuck and tantrum: each round, I’ll post a link to a poll in which you'll get to cast your votes on what will happen that episode, from who wins the challenge to who lip syncs for their life. Think of yourself as a drag dictator. Kim Jong UNHhhh, if you will. I’ll use the results to write the series (for example, I’ll pick from the top two vote-getters for elimination to sashay away, based on which makes more sense from a narrative point of view). You’ll also get to vote on your favourite and least favourite queens, which will also influence who lasts long and who does a Magnolia Crawford. Depending on how many responses I get, and also on whether or not my laptop decides to work, the episodes will be every two days or so, meaning this should all be wrapped up in about a month.

But what’s so “alternative” about this, Mr MB, I hear you ask? Well, that’s the thing. The queens you’ll be voting on won’t be the fierce and fabulous cast of season 10, but a specially-crafted group of brand new (and very real… well, as real as a drag queen can be under all that silicone) contestants, most of which have been plucked by yours truly from Instagram. I’ve done a bit of research to put together bios for each of them, and I hope they’ll be an entertaining cast for the gays of TiBB to use as their puppets if nothing else. They'll be taking part in original challenges, also concocted by moi, but those are the only things that are planned. Everything else will be squarely your fault.

Very shortly, I’ll be revealing the queens one-by-one, before posting the first survey of the season for you to have your say on this motley cRu (my puns will only get worse from here on out, so brace yourselves)

So gentlemen, start your engines, and may whichever woman a bunch of forum members arbitrarily decide to get behind, win!

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[just for clarification, I’ve spoken to Riley about this considering he’s also just launched a Drag Race game, and he’s fine with it, the darling that he is]