[Redway]

Lol.

https://youtu.be/xI-VR6Pxrvc

I’m leaving this video here and leaving it at that.

[Cherie]

Absolutely no different to how it is now, as you get older you tend to limit socialising to what you like and who you like not go out because the expectation is you should be out doing things every weekend

[Liam-]

Originally Posted by Redway

There’s a way to politely-disagree without making jibes that aren’t funny and clearly intended to bait. LT’s been like this for years and I’m not the only one to have this issue with him but it’s whatever. There’s little point going back-and-forth with complete strangers about stuff that they’re probably never going to understand anyway.

You kicked off at someone for their opinion before LT commented though?

[ThomasC]

Originally Posted by thesheriff443

Money doesn’t really come into it unless you are trying to buy your way into lifestyle that’s above your earnings

Staying in is the new going out

Going out into town you will come across some right idiots

Originally Posted by LeatherTrumpet

"my personality type is like an eclectic blend of INFJ, ISTP, ENFP and reserved ENFJ."

Id work on the chat-up lines if I were you

Originally Posted by ThomasC

Are you feeling low Redway?

I have watched some of that video on gaslighting.

Please tell me how any of the three quoted comments is gaslighting? You can't because it is not gaslighting.

Sheriff's post was his personal opinion... LTs was a joke and mine was asking if you felt low.

How do any of those three comments make you doubt your reality or beliefs? How are any of those 3 comments abuse? How are any of those 3 comments manipulation?

They DONT and ARENT And if you still think they do then you need to seek some professional help, maybe some CBT to try and restructure your thought processes because it's certainly not normal.

Unlike you, as you have said repeatedly now that it's your last words on the subject, will not continue to fuel this fire of yours.

Good luck whatever you decide to do.

[Redway]

Originally Posted by Redway

Lol.

https://youtu.be/xI-VR6Pxrvc

I’m leaving this video here and leaving it at that.

.

Like I said that’s where I want to leave it. That’s another boundary I’m setting. I admit I might’ve been a little hasty with sherrif nearer the top of this thread but that’s all I’m going to concede on.

[Redway]

Originally Posted by ThomasC

I have watched some of that video on gaslighting.

Please tell me how any of the three quoted comments is gaslighting? You can't because it is not gaslighting.

Sheriff's post was his personal opinion... LTs was a joke and mine was asking if you felt low.

How do any of those three comments make you doubt your reality or beliefs? How are any of those 3 comments abuse? How are any of those 3 comments manipulation?

They DONT and ARENT And if you still think they do then you need to seek some professional help, maybe some CBT to try and restructure your thought processes because it's certainly not normal.

Unlike you, as you have said repeatedly now that it's your last words on the subject, will not continue to fuel this fire of yours.

Good luck whatever you decide to do.

This is exactly what we’re talking about. At the end of the day my reality is my reality and yours is yours. No-one else’s. Without knowing the context of the forum relation between me and LT you’re not getting the full picture and it’s not aligned with your own version of reality but my perceptions are as relevant to me as yours are. If I’m annoyed with someone for baiting (again) I have a right to say so. Whether you understand or not is unnecessary for my peace of mind because it’s nothing to do with you. There’s no point asking me how or why I’ve felt personally-attacked (not even attacked but just for the sake of linguistic simplicity and to use your words). I don’t have to share that with you if I don’t want to because it’s personal to me. But what I did want to do is set a boundary with LeatherTrumpet in the form of him not commenting on my threads going forward (just like Livia did with kizzy many moons ago) because his replies don’t bring meaning or stimulation to anything I say.

The reason I was so annoyed with sherrif earlier on was because it came across to me like he was making assumptions about my own social life (which is something that just doesn’t mesh well with me, for reasons I’m not going to get into with total strangers on a public forum but ultimately have nothing to do with any of the blatantly-bait-y suggestions put forth by other people). He clarified and I should’ve conceded with (and apologised to) him there-and-then but LT came along and that’s where most of my conversational energy ended up having to be directed. I’ll apologise to him for getting the wrong end of the stick with him but at the end of the day anyone who’s lived a day in my shoes would understand why I took offence to it at first.

Other than that we’ve clearly got nothing to say to each other. Going forward don’t tell me to seek therapy for setting boundaries with a toxic member I’ve never liked and who’s made sickening comments over the years but gets away with it all the time because he’s assumed to be harmless.

And when someone sends you a video, try and watch all of it before commenting, not just the first three minutes. You’re never going to get the full context of my personal motivations for saying certain things and moving to certain FMs in a certain way because I’m not one to share my personal life even with people I do know (let alone strangers) but when someone’s giving you context for free you might as well take advantage of it and hear the person out in full. It doesn’t take more than 15 minutes, really. You’re free to gaslight and pathologise experiences which doesn’t resonate with yours but that won’t get you far. And it’s clearly not normal.

[parmnion]

Originally Posted by Redway

I don’t know how many MBTI enthusiasts we have on here but just in case anyone might know what I’m on about, my personality type is like an eclectic blend of INFJ, ISTP, ENFP and reserved ENFJ.

In other words I’m a lot more content with far lesser social interaction than the average person (I have my own inner world to keep me company at the best of times) but I’m still pretty ambiverted. When the extroverted side of my personality isn’t being fulfilled on the same level as I’d like it to be because of limited funds it gets frustrating very quickly. Just because I’m used to the staid, somber approach to life doesn’t mean I want to live in that world 100% of the time (outside professional obligations).

If you talk to sherrif Tue same way you talk to yourself in your own head. It wont get you anywhere in life.

[Redway]

Originally Posted by parmnion

Dont talk to others like sherrif the same way you talk to yourself in your own head. It wont get you anywhere in life.

Again, your own perception of life is based on your experiences and relationships. The people I talk to about these things have a real understanding of stuff like this and that’s alright. If I over-extend on the knowledge factor, it’s not exactly crime or the century and it shouldn’t be a big deal. Just respectfully read/fail to understand it and keep it pushing.

Having that kind of Jungian extraordinare approach (which pops up every now and then but not as a rule) might not win me favours in your corner but I’m not really interested in your corner so that doesn’t make any odds to me. Not having an understanding of something doesn’t mean the other person’s a geek with no life. It just means you have different experiences in life and aren’t honed-in on the same stuff.

[Redway]

Being respectful when it comes to other people’s outlooks on life (as niche as they might seem to you), on the other hand, is something that’ll take you far in life and there could’ve been more of that on this thread. But we’ve argued the bones off of that to the point of serious derailment so let’s not keep barking up that tree.

[parmnion]

Originally Posted by Redway

Again, your own perception of life is based on your experiences and relationships. The people I talk to about these things have a real understanding of stuff like this and that’s alright. If I over-extend on the knowledge factor, it’s not exactly crime or the century and it shouldn’t be a big deal. Just respectfully read/fail to understand it and keep it pushing.

Having that kind of Jungian extraordinare approach (which pops up every now and then but not as a rule) might not win me favours in your corner but I’m not really interested in your corner so that doesn’t make any odds to me. Not having an understanding of something doesn’t mean the other person’s a geek with no life. It just means you have different experiences in life and aren’t honed-in on the same stuff.

But in life in general, a my way or the high way attitude, coupled with intolerance and an aggresive response to general day to day conversation like the first few posts sherrif made, just wont get you anywhere.

It's not my life experience, it's pure and simple life experience..

Your attitude you displayed on page one! Well when you are trying to have this same conversation and discussion in a pub or whatever! Well all I can say each time you have enough cash to further your life experiences, with that attitude to others the extra will only make things worse.

[Redway]

Originally Posted by parmnion

But in life in general, a my way or the high way attitude, coupled with intolerance and an aggresive response to general day to day conversation like the first few posts sherrif made, just wont get you anywhere.

It's not my life experience, it's pure and simple life experience..

Your attitude you displayed on page one! Well when you are trying to have this same conversation and discussion in a pub or whatever! Well all I can say each time you have enough cash to further your life experiences, with that attitude to others the extra will only make things worse.

Again, I’ve explained my point of view several times and I said I didn’t want this thread to be derailed any further so all I can say to all that is “okay.”

[parmnion]

I guess it wouldnt matter if you won tonight's lottery...my way or the high way could easily work out.

But people would talk behind your back.

[Redway]

Okay. People are going to talk regardless of what you’re saying and doing but okay. Okay.

And I’d argue making subtle jibes (as pseudo-humorously-coloured as they might be) just because certain experiences aren’t understood by the other party/comes across as over their head is pretty intolerant but okay.

See what I mean?

That’s why I don’t play to the gossip-book. Other people’s experiences are going to shape their perceptions of you but they tend to be more of a reflection on them than you if they don’t actually know you that personally. You can either say your bit, concede if need be and just keep it pushing or bump a tired argument and ridicule someone else’s philosophies just because you’re not in line with yours or you don’t understand them. Life in general would be easier if we didn’t feel like we had to censor ourselves in such a hypocritical manner all the time just to please strangers.

Again, all I’m saying at this point is a big, fat okay.

[parmnion]

Yes but it's always better having them saying nice things rather than calling you an arrogant twat.

[Redway]

Okay, pal. Okay.

[Redway]

Still shagging your brother?

[parmnion]

I hope you never get enough money to go out further than the local park with a 4 pack, for your own safety.

[Redway]

Okay. In between telling us how your Ijebu friend’s wife’s food sucked at that BBQ just to spite people, being a known alkie and openly-admitting to doing the dirty with your own brother there are tons of things you’ve said over the years that make it hard to take you seriously as a voice of morality and uniform life experiences but you do you.

I don’t do 4-packs at the park. It might be alright for you but I’ve actually got principles and a certain degree of class. You won’t find me in the middle of Essex in the morning looking for a house-party well into my 50s. Not my style.

[Redway]

Also, expressing a bit of natural wanting to have the resources to do more outdoors-y stuff on the weekend doesn’t make me dirt-poor. It just means I’ve got my priorities in check life-wise but wouldn’t mind exploring a bit more. That just makes me a responsible person in a somewhat tight temporary situation. It doesn’t erode me of class and high standards altogether. Far from it.

Again, it’s best not to make assumptions about strangers. I bet you haven’t seen the inside of a Waitrose or even big Asda in a while (if ever) but those are some of my niche spots I shop at from time to time. Park-bencher I couldn’t be any further-removed from. But you’re welcome to talk about yourself and your own dirty habits. Just don’t think everyone’s the same as you. By all means call me arrogant, passive-aggressive, intolerant and the full works. Side with prejudiced trolls. But at the end of the day people’s perceptions about you should carry the same weight as their interpersonal proximity with you and we don’t know each other from a bottle of milk so speculating about people’s characters won’t get you far. Especially when there’s so much dirt on you.

[parmnion]

Originally Posted by Redway

Okay. In between telling us how your Ijebu friend’s wife’s food sucked at that BBQ just to spite people, being a known alkie and openly-admitting to doing the dirty with your own brother there are tons of things you’ve said over the years that make it hard to take you seriously as a voice of morality and uniform life experiences but you do you.

I don’t do 4-packs at the park. It might be alright for you but I’ve actually got principles and a certain degree of class. You won’t find me in the middle of Essex in the morning looking for a house-party well into my 50s. Not my style.

It wasnt the food...if you remember correctly it was the African non alcoholic guiness type drink..which was rank. A known alky, fair enough ai like a drink, and took my fair share during covid, but I still worked monday to friday keeping many many Londoners happy. ..the brother things funny, and strange as I only remember posting his photo and saying how handsome he was.

As for me trying to be righteous about life morals, you are wrong, I was trying to give you some friendly advice, wish I hadnt, and wished I had trusted my very first opinion on you, cause you are indeed a pathetic ****.

You wont find me wandering essex for a party, maybe some east London roundabouts after a house party, but that's just having a good night in my eyes..A story worthy of telling..

We could all sit in a park on a sunny day with certain makes of lager in our hands and ask tibb what they think of them....but that's a bit tacky and scummy imo..

If your going to go for it, dont waste it in a park during it..save that for when the experience takes you there at the end of it....most of all dont ignore your surroundings whilst out there just to post on tibb, unless it's a train journey.

And also, grow the **** up and respect your elders..didnt belt you hard enough, did they.

[Redway]

Again, you don’t know me well enough to tell me who I am. Your opinions about me are as relevant as the Sahara Desert is to Antarctica.

But feel free to go off. Okay?

[parmnion]

I know your parents failed you by not beating some respect into you.

[Redway]

You don’t know nothing.

Respect is earned. Drop racist jibes in the name of harmless bait and take up a tone of unwarranted condescension and you won’t get a drop of respect from me. It has to be earned. I don’t care how old or young you are.

[Redway]

Again, you only know what you know. Between us it’s just assumptions and ignorance. You don’t know the first thing about me.

[parmnion]

Almighty God, I ask you to send your angels to be with me in this place, and protect me from all assaults of the Evil One. Please forgive any wrong that has been perpetuated in this room, and grant those who offend you the grace of conversion. Dispel the powers of darkness that may be in this room and protect me this night, and those who will sleep here in the forthcoming nights. Jesus, I trust in You!