[Red Moon]

Apprentice star Alan Sugar hates yes men

She's an academic lawyer with a "dicky back" and a love of ancient Greek scrolls. He's a semi-retired PR man who lives in France with a collection of tractors.

But as Sir Alan Sugar's trusty "eyes and ears" on The Apprentice, Nick Hewer and Margaret Mountford are now one of TV's best-known couples. "We are, of course, just friends," tsks Nick. "Though my girlfriend Catherine says we do make a perfect twosome."

Margaret shoots Nick her trademark glare of mock-stern disapproval. He returns her his raised eyebrow atop suck-a-lemon cheeks.

In life, as on television, they don't really have any other expressions.

But that's their strength. You always know what you're getting with Nick and Margaret.

The two are vital to the show, padding about after Sir Alan's wannabes, reporting back to the boss.

As Margaret, 56, says: "Alan hates yes-men. He knows we'll tell him what we think."

It's easy to see why Sugar depends on his lieutenants. Margaret, in her sensible flats and white helmet of hair, is as reliable as a Victorian lacrosse mistress.

They gel like a long-married couple. And they're unswerving in their admiration of Sugar. "He'd make a terribly good barrister," says Nick, 64. "Before the boardroom we sit down with him for four hours and dump on him everything we've learned about the candidates.

"It's incredibly tough. We've got to go in with our guns loaded."

And Margaret doesn't hold back.

She flashes those eyes again. "Of course, it's harder for us," she says.

"We have to be there the whole time.

For the fish task we had to be up at 5am and we worked on through until 3am the next day. But Alan just turns up for the boardroom. He doesn't do standing round fish stalls."

Despite their sombre image, they do like a chuckle. Posing for pictures on the wind-blown roof of Canary Wharf Tower, 750ft up, Nick is as handy as a tight-rope walker.

But Margaret is bent double, whimpering in terror but bravely trying to take pictures over the parapet with her mobile phone.

Then a thought strikes her and she whips round. "Don't you dare take a picture of my bottom," she tells the photographer, wagging a finger. The poor man, who is doing no such thing, drops his cameras obediently.

Sugar approached the pair - who have worked for him for 25 years - four years ago. And, as the fourth series gets under way, they're still as thick as thieves. The pair worked together in 1993 when Margaret advised Sugar, who then owned Tottenham Hotspur, to sack manager Terry Venables.

Nick managed the PR after-math. But for all their professionalism and grit, they are hugely likeable, though both tut at this. "Oh dear, we've failed," says Margaret. I am almost sure she's joking.

Some of the candidates have tried to work on this kindness, hoping to gain an edge in the boardroom.

"We won't have any of that, will we Margaret?" says Nick. "No, we won't," snaps Margaret.

The ghastly Katie Hopkins tried to flirt with Nick. He frowns. "Yes, she was giving me the big eyes."

Margaret adds: "And she wore green eye shadow. That just won't do." We all shudder at the memory.

But their most loathed contestant is Syed. Nick says: "He used to oil his way across the floor, oozing charm from every pore. He'd come in and admire your scent, didn't he, Margaret?"

"Yes, he did," she says, appalled.

"And I don't even wear perfume."

Nick is a divorced father-of two who has lived with his girlfriend, a businesswoman aged 59, for 11 years. Margaret is divorced and doesn't have children. "I've never wanted them, never liked them."

She is, without doubt, a largely serious person. A minister's daughter from Ulster, even her hobby is unpronounceable: a PhD in papyrology.

"My thesis is on Greek documentary papyri that show how the Romans administered Egypt," she explains.

Crikey. Does she do anything frivolous? "I ski, I go to the theatre, the opera, the cinema. I read Jilly Cooper. That's frivolous, isn't it?"

Then, as if pulling a rabbit out of a hat, she says triumphantly: "I went to see Ratatouille. With chums. But it wasn't as good as Shrek and Finding Nemo."

And there we have it. Margaret's frivolous side at last - a passion for children's cartoons. "Yes, they're wasted on children, I always think."

They have both worked hard and live in well-deserved style. Nick and Catherine have their French estate, a chalet in Val d'Isere and the old family home in Northants. Margaret lives alone in a stuccoed Bays water flat and has a holiday home on the island of Gozo. But she still takes the bus and gets terribly cross when strangers accost her .

She adds: "One woman came up to me and said, 'Can't Sugar buy you a car?' I thought it was very rude.

"People have a perception that if you're on TV you're getting the same amount of money as Jonathan Ross."

When Nick admits paying for upgrades on Ryanair and taking taxis, she looks slightly disapproving.

Then he beams at her and hails a cab. Margaret harrumphs but climbs in, still grumbling.

Sir Alan just turns up for boardroom. He doesn't do fish stalls

Their Top Five tips for hopefuls

1 Know your strengths Margaret: "We've seen many candidates saying, "I'm an expert at this" and then they fall flat on their face."

2 Do your homework Nick: "If you want to work for someone, find out what makes them tick."

3 Be prepared to work hard Margaret: "Alan expects to get his money's worth from his apprentice."

4 Be honest Nick: "You shouldn't blame someone else for your mistakes - nor should you carry the can."

5 Be courageous Margaret: "Always admit you don't know something - then go and find someone who does. Quickly."

THEIR VERDICT ON THIS YEAR'S CONTESTANTS

JENNY CELERIER

Nick: She came across as the most dreadful control freak.

Margaret: She behaved very badly but at least she spoke up for herself. Pricing laundry at £4.99 per item was crazy.

SARA DHADA

Nick:: Squeaky, always complaining. And an international car dealer. That speaks volumes.

Margaret: She kept saying "Me and so-and-so" instead of "so-and-so and I". Horrid.

RAEF BJAYOU

Nick: An intelligent version of Syed Ahmed - televisual magic. I thought his hair was a toupee but it's just a carefully contrived bouffant.

Margaret: His "I deal with prince and pauper" line was priceless. Alan's eyes almost popped out. But he does wear a very fetching Noel Coward-style dressinggown.

LUCINDA LEDGERWOOD

Nick: wants to be noticed, hence the purple beret. Is she from this planet?

Margaret: Brighter than would appear from the laundry task ...she's articulate.

JENNIFER MAGUIRE

Nick: A tough north Dubliner. That accent is one of the least at tractive in the world.

Margaret: The photographers said she was terribly photogenic. I didn't think she was.

ALEX WOTHERSPOON

Nick: The women all seem to love him. My own partner Catherine is terribly taken too. She thinks that he looks like a film star. But he is no fool.

Margaret: Well, I think he's got jolly messy hair. Keep an eye out for his overcoat in future episodes - he wears it in the most ludicrous fashion. He has Superman pyjamas, too. Inexcusable.

KEVIN SHAW

Nick:: I can't believe he's a bank manager. His negotiation skills in the laundry task were woeful.

Margaret: He has terribly funny moments - watch him in next we ek's pub food task.

LEE MCQUEEN

Nick: He looks like a crane driver. Otherwise unremarkable.

Margaret: The girls seem to fancy him. But he doesn't make me swoon - he's no Clark Gable.

LINDI MNGAZA

Nick: She tried flashing her eyes and teeth at me. But she does have a bubbly personality. Would do well working with children.

Margaret: An idiot who looks like a beautician. Her bright laundry idea was a 24-hour hotline. As Alan said, who wants to call at 4am to ask how their pants are progressing?

HELENE SPEIGHT

Nick:: She's an international global pricing leader. But she doesn't stand up for herself much.

Margaret: I think she will get more able. I can't say much more.

SHAZIA WAHAB

Nick:: Gone. And she deserved to go.

Margaret: She should have stuck up for herself. She's was a moaner, not a grafter. And worse, a mosaic artist.

MICHAEL SOPHOCLES

Nick:: He was very enterprising to fund his studies by working as a gigolo. Keep an eye on him. He has some fine moments.

Margaret: He was absurdly pleased to sell so many lobsters when, at £5 a time, he was effectively giving them away. Wait until you hear him sing. Appalling.

NICHOLAS DELACY-BROWN

Nick:: Tongue-tied in the boardroom, and an arrogant pup.

Margaret: The least eloquent candidate I've seen - ex traordinary for a barrister.

IAN STRINGER

Nick:: Reports on his local football team for the BBC from time to time. Won't set the world alight.

Margaret: Was he really a love-rat? I can't remember much about him.

CLAIRE YOUNG

Nick:: Resolute and has a thick hide. She fibbed to me once - I had to give her what for.

Margaret: She's a motormouth. But she'll turn her hand to most things.

SIMON SMITH

Nick:: Charming, but a puppy. People do fancy him for the long run, though.

Margaret: He's hard not to like - he grows on you.

THEIR VERDICT ON PAST CONTESTANTS

SYED AHMED

Nick: An odious bugger on his uppers. No redeeming feature at all. Sly and disreputable.

Margaret: Stupid. Surprising that Michelle had a fling with him. She must have seen something we didn't.

RUTH BADGER

Nick:: She was great fun - the life and soul. But her talents lay perhaps too much in selling.

Margaret: You could have a laugh with Ruth. But Alan thought she wouldn't fit in. Ruth is in your face.

MICHELLE DEWBERRY

Nick:: An ice-cold fish. I preferred Ruth (Badger).

Margaret: She was a worthy winner. But I would have picked Ruth.

SAIRA KHAN

Nick: I admire her. She's bright, and a powerful writer.

Margaret: Saira's great - a dependable force of nature. I'm very fond of her.

TRE AZAM

Nick: Basically, he's just not house-trained.

Margaret: I agree but he has improved. A bit.

KATIE HOPKINS

Nick: She's damaged goods, trying to carve out a niche for herself as Mrs Nasty, a female Simon Cowell.

Margaret: Pursuing married men and then bragging about it is just not nice.

Source: Daily Mirror

[Christina]

Oh i liked Lindi lol x