[Red Moon]

X Factor Laura makes a show of herself

IT’S all going a bit wrong on X Factor at the moment.

In case you don’t know, Vickersgate was the latest scandal to hit the reality TV show – as in Diana Vickers, far right, the blonde with the love-it-or-loathe-it “ickle gurl” voice who was given a bye to last night’s stage of the competition because of apparent laryngitis.

I say “apparent” because footage has since emerged of her laughing and screaming at a bonfire party just days before she conveniently threw a sickie and got to bypass the technically tricky Mariah Carey round, which saw hot favourite Laura Wright booted off.

Possible tactical “off-games” note aside, I mainly dislike Diana, right, because of: A. The way she keeps holding her hand to her face when singing like she’s about to go into a bad theatrical faint, and B. Because she seems to be morphing into Dolores O’Riordan from The Cranberries.

Honestly, the way her voice insists on going up in a little yelpy yodel at the end of every line is driving me crazy!

Look love, there’s only two exceptions for whom I’ll excuse yodelling ever occurring in my house and that’s Spaced Cowboy by Sly And The Family Stone and the work of long-dead jazz giant Leon Thomas.

The latter had an accident while doing a yoga headstand and ended up biting clean through his lower lip, leaving him unable to scat.

But, with a mouth full of stitches and a gig booked, he gave it a go anyway – the result sounding roughly akin to Sir Jimmy Savile jingle-jangling all the way down an elevator shaft.

Needless to say though, Laura Wright fans were crying conspiracy and, as I was telling my reclusive elderly American neighbour Mr Presley only yesterday, I love a conspiracy theory.

Laura didn’t seem to mind, however, having been snapped not long afterwards enjoying her new fame at the Soho club where she posed with a host of celebrities, including Gail Porter.

Sorry, that last line should have read: “pictured with a host of celebrities, and Gail Porter”.

Source: Wales Online