[Daniel.]

4. Lea Walker



]Lea. I don't really know what to say about Lea that hasn't already been said before, hence why I've been putting this writeup off for a while. Her surviving this long seems to have caused a bit of debate and disagreement within the thread, but for me Lea s pretty much my ideal housemate, or one of my favourite archetypes (train-wreck with no filter) done to perfection. Aswell as this, she's an ex porn star with the biggest boobs in Britain. I mean what kind of self respecting gay wouldn't be instantly drawn to Lea? Despite starting off seeming like a shallow wannabee, there were many sides to Lea, a lot of talk is made of Aisleyne's complexity, but I found Lea just as much so, and made more compelling by the fact, with Lea, unlike Aisleyne and some others, there was no doubt in my mind it was real. Lea was apologetically herself from the moment she entered to the moment she left the house demanding the producers let her out by calling them "cunts", Lea bared herself to us all in the summer of 2006 (or, to most reading here, on a laptop screen sometime in the 2010s). Lea is such a mind **** who changed her personality and opinions daily it's hard to know what to say, but I'll go by her two prominent sides.

Sexual mother figure of the house - I think this is what Lea came in to the house hoping to be seen as, and she was this to an extent, but she was kind of like a messed up twisted version. Lea was massively sexual - she was probably the crudest housemate ever with the way she spoke, and I mean this is a show that has housed the likes of Makosi and Kinga, so that's not an easy accolade. She was constantly talking about, or referring to sex, cock, clunge, etc. My favourite line of her being "They think they'll get prince charming but all they get is a cold-saw and clap down below." I mean she ****ing deepthroated a carrot ffs. ALSO remember that time her and Aisleyne went into the DR and Lea just came out with "CAN WE HAVE SOME COCK PLEASE? " #me. Lea's mothering was more smothering in the sense that she really was too much at times, but do I believe she genuinely cared about a lot of the housemates? Yes, unquestionably. The main thing Lea is remembered for is her story with Pete, but this brings us more to her other side.

Paranoid wreck - This is what Lea mainly was during her stay in the house. I genuinely can't think of anyone as paranoid as her, yes you have people like Kemal, but that was after months of Makosi ****ing his head. Lea literally came into the house protesting about how the crowd booed her before she even said hello to her housemates. She cried because a primary school girl said they didn't like her. When her name was announced as a nominee in week two, she was so sure she was going, there was pretty much no question in her mind that she would go - it was nice then to see her survive the vote, but of course, Lea being Lea, she went on and on about how this means she was accepted for having blonde hair and big tits - as if that's all people could dislike her for. I kind of relate in some ways to Lea's attitude in the house and thus I sympathised with her, because though I would never do Big Brother, I know if I did I would be a crumbling mess the whole time. Moving onto the Pete situation, whilst it never reached Craig and Anthony levels, she really did smother him. She was insanely paranoid and turned pon people - most famously Aisleyne - but also, in more subtle ways, Nikki and Lisa too. She would harass Pete about how he had changed if she saw him simply hang out with the other girls. It was pretty disturbing ****, but it was never not compelling to watch for me.

I get why people dislike Lea - she's a paranoid, crude woman with a huge temper, but for me she's about as real and fascinating as a housemate we've ever had.

Have some gifs of this Big Brother icon

Spoiler:

and this one - which pretty much sums her up, and also me to all the people who dislike her