Teachers.

[CaraRawr]

Discuss your weirdest/funniest/coolest/hottest teachers... we've all had them. :]

I had my first lesson with my GCSE biology teacher today and he is actually such a creeper, but such a legend. I was just sitting there and he comes over and goes, "Your nails are very nice darling. Now I have some sandpaper and acid in the prep room... you're a bad girl." (my nails were painted blue and we have a no nail polish rule at school). I was sitting there like "D:" for most of the lesson. it was scary, he said the bad girl bit in this really creepy voice. and he has a real, dead pig in a jar in the classroom, i almost threw up - it was grim. and then the teaching assistant pulled me to the side and told me i had too much eyeliner on rofl.

so yeah.

[Smithy]

We had an alcoholic chemistry teacher for the past 3 years, we set bins/desks and once someone's bag on fire and he didn't give a sh!t.

He's retiring this year which is a bit of a shame though :(

[Lucy.]

I had a geography teacher in middle school called Mr Isles, always amused me :hugesmile:

[Jessica.]

Principal called Mrs Cummins.

[CaraRawr]

I had this ginger science teacher last year too, he couldn't control the class at all and was obsessed with Star Wars and Futurama. Everyone used to hide under the desks and stuff. He wore ties with fish and cats on as well. :laugh:

[Smithy]

We have a Geog teacher atm who goes off and complete tangents, repeats the same stories we've heard a million times, and gives the same advice all the time. He's only in his 40's but he's so goddamn repetitive.
He told us he used to be a kiss-o-gram :(

[Lee.]

My Latin teacher used to frighten me (at first) he used to keep a big bamboo looking cane beside his desk and if anthing annoyed him like people forgetting their homework etc he used to repeatedly whack it on his desk whilst shouting and kind of jumping... Almost in a Basil Fawlty/branch/car way! :D I used to ambush the worst culprit for not doing his hoemwork in the common room in the morning and make him copy mine, just to avoid the bloody noise! He ended up being one of my fav teachers though :)

[Claymores]

We had an alcoholic chemistry teacher for the past 3 years, we set bins/desks and once someone's bag on fire and he didn't give a sh!t.

He's retiring this year which is a bit of a shame though :(

He as probably bored with dimwitted /unruly kids - I'd turn to the bottle too in his situation

[Shasown]

We had a science teacher who liked to lounge against his table while teaching us. One time he leaned too close to a gas burner that was lit and set fire to his jacket.

My how we laughed as he realised his jacket was on fire. Never saw him move so fast.

[Smithy]

He as probably bored with dimwitted /unruly kids - I'd turn to the bottle too in his situation

Oh no he was an alchey beforehand, so people took advantage and set the desks on fire :p

[Claymores]

My Latin teacher used to frighten me (at first) he used to keep a big bamboo looking cane beside his desk and if anthing annoyed him like people forgetting their homework etc he used to repeatedly whack it on his desk whilst shouting and kind of jumping... Almost in a Basil Fawlty/branch/car way! :D I used to ambush the worst culprit for not doing his hoemwork in the common room in the morning and make him copy mine, just to avoid the bloody noise! He ended up being one of my fav teachers though :)

Coprpral punishment was banished in the late 70s in Escossia

I still remember getting the belt by a teacher so hard it made the bit between my thumb and fingers bleed

[Deirdre]

We have THE HOTTEST P.E teacher ever. He's a model.
http://www.catwalkmodels.ie/index.php?cat=&mact=Album,m3,default,1&m3albumid=4&m3pageno=1&m3cat=2&m3returnid=53&m3returnid=53&page=53

He's really nice too. :lovedup:

[Lee.]

Coprpral punishment was banished in the late 70s in Escossia

I still remember getting the belt by a teacher so hard it made the bit between my thumb and fingers bleed

Thank christ I missed it.. I'm not so sure I could have let a teacher hit me.. not in high school anyway! Bloody hell, you're an adult at high school near enough. I just can't see an 18 year old me standing letting a teacher hit my hand till it bled! bugger that!

[Lee.]

We have THE HOTTEST P.E teacher ever. He's a model.
http://www.catwalkmodels.ie/index.php?cat=&mact=Album,m3,default,1&m3albumid=4&m3pageno=1&m3cat=2&m3returnid=53&m3returnid=53&page=53

He's really nice too. :lovedup:

Never! God I wish my PE teachers had looked like that when I was at school! Mind you, I think I could have dealt with a hot Maths teacher or summat but I think I would have been a bit mortified by a dishy PE teacher... I run like Bridget Jones and fall and stuff when nervous or think there's anyone watching me so it would probably be magnified tenfold if it was a model teacher!! :D

[Stacey.]

My Biology teacher is amazing. she tells us lots of interesting stories. and there's this one about some man going McDonalds, he gets an STI from eating mayonnaise. just thinking about what happened to it before he ate it.. D:

[CaraRawr]

We have THE HOTTEST P.E teacher ever. He's a model.
http://www.catwalkmodels.ie/index.php?cat=&mact=Album,m3,default,1&m3albumid=4&m3pageno=1&m3cat=2&m3returnid=53&m3returnid=53&page=53

He's really nice too. :lovedup:

Omfg. And I thought my Orlando Bloom-lookalike PE teacher was hot.

[Deirdre]

Never! God I wish my PE teachers had looked like that when I was at school! Mind you, I think I could have dealt with a hot Maths teacher or summat but I think I would have been a bit mortified by a dishy PE teacher... I run like Bridget Jones and fall and stuff when nervous or think there's anyone watching me so it would probably be magnified tenfold if it was a model teacher!! :D

LOL.
I just tell him I don't want to play so I just sit there and stare at him!

[Claymores]

Thank christ I missed it.. I'm not so sure I could have let a teacher hit me.. not in high school anyway! Bloody hell, you're an adult at high school near enough. I just can't see an 18 year old me standing letting a teacher hit my hand till it bled! bugger that!

My story was not at High School - I was 8 at the time a teacher gave me 3 straps of the belt for climbing over a wall - and it was my turn to climb as our football had gone over

[Claymores]

Oh no he was an alchey beforehand, so people took advantage and set the desks on fire :p

Ah I see - the old addage is 'if you can't get a job, just teach'

[Lee.]

My story was not at High School - I was 8 at the time a teacher gave me 3 straps of the belt for climbing over a wall - and it was my turn to climb as our football had gone over

That's awful.. I would hate the thought of my kids getting hit at school!

[Claymores]

That's awful.. I would hate the thought of my kids getting hit at school!

it's in the past, but no wonder Scotland are sh1t at football when primary school treachers would use a special belt on kids for playing football

Maybe that's the secret of Fegie's success :joker:

[BOOSH]

@ cara's first post..
That's why i hated school haha

[Shasown]

My Biology teacher is amazing. she tells us lots of interesting stories. and there's this one about some man going McDonalds, he gets an STI from eating mayonnaise. just thinking about what happened to it before he ate it.. D:

Your biology teacher should spend the lesson teaching you facts not urban myths.

http://www.dailykos.com/story/2007/1/29/17575/0171

http://www.snopes.com/horrors/food/semen.asp

[Claymores]

Another story is our semi-alcololic Ecomomics teacher who used to ramble-on with none of us paying attention.

At the end of one lesson, our homework was to find out what "Homogeneous" meant.

Of course nobody rushed home to look up the dictionary, so mext lesson he came in with bad mood and ssked what homogenious means.

As nobody could answer he gave the whole class 1000 lines to write "Homogeneous means all of the same kind"

I suppose it worked as 30 years later I can still remember this useless word!

I learned Economics from the book - such is public school teachers in Scotland

[Claymores]

Your biology teacher should spend the lesson teaching you facts not urban myths.

http://www.dailykos.com/story/2007/1/29/17575/0171

http://www.snopes.com/horrors/food/semen.asp

Aitcha seen the adverts Terry? you've got to be inventive n ispiring to get 13k reward from the Govt - sod the facts!!!

[Claymores]

BEST Sctottish School moments was our French Assistist (a French lass on exchange) who would wear mimi-skirt n black stockings. I can't remember 2 words to put together but all males in class could tell tell 328 years later that she was called franciose about 5 9 and bum to die for

[Princess]

Best teacher-My History teacher Ms. Connolly. Not only was she amazing at teaching History,she was a lovely people and treated us as people,rather than annoying students. History was always my favourite class,cos she'd just make everything interesting and help you understand something if it wasn't easy. She was also really nice whenever I had a bit of personal trouble. I went from a failed Mock in History to a B3 in my Leaving cos of her. At the end of 6th year,she wrote all her class these little notes about how great we were as people,lot of tears.
My Home Ec. teacher Ms. Burchill was also brilliant,she gave out really good notes and taught really well. Home Ec. was my best subject by a mile,I found it so easy and enjoyable.

Worst teacher-My Biology teacher, Ms. Massey. Oh good lord,that woman couldn't teach. We went to the principal about it so many times and she asked us to log down everything that Ms. Massey said in class,20 minutes in and she hadn't said a single thing about Biology. It's cos of our class complaining that she's not allowed to teach Leaving Cert students anymore. I remember I missed a Biology Christmas exam once cos I had gone to Manchester to see Take That(she knew I already been to see them in London 2 weeks pervious) She was none to pleased,she came up to me on Monday,looked at my badges and went 'You enjoy your concert then,didn't you already see them?' and ranted at me for ages about missing the exam. It wasn't even an official one,our Mocks were only a few weeks after! Urgh,yeah hated her.
Mr. Flynn,my business teacher was annoying,mean and he had BO.
Ms. Lewis,my Maths teacher would never stop going on me about not studying enough besides the fact I wasn't even using Maths for my points and had 6 Honours subjects I had to pay more attention to. The whole class hated her,she was never anything but mean.
The PE teachers-Stand in the corner wearing loads of layers while they shouted at us for not running enough while we froze. I hated PE with a passion.
*thinks some more* I liked my English teacher,she said I had a skill for being able to get Take That into absolutely anything I wrote,I'm not sure whether she said it as a bad thing or not.
My Irish teacher knew none of us liked the subject and told us stories of his life a lot,he was fine most of the time.
My French teacher was lovely,even though I was absolutely rubbish at French,she helped me write an entire page about Take That for my oral. I only got a D2 in my Leaving and she said I did my best and she was proud of me anyways.

I think that was them all. God school seems a million miles away now.

[Claymores]

God school seems a million miles away now.

From Gad School you became a Mod so part of the way there - plenty of time to become a deity

[Ninastar]

we have a teacher called mr.dyke. I only just realized this year why people always laugh at his name.
My p.e teacher is a babe. she always bitches about people with us. Shes really cool actually.