If you could punch only ONE person in the face ...

[Stu]

For the sake of a backstory, we'll say a genie has granted you one wish of his choosing (he's a stingy genie). The wish? You get to punch one person, full-on in the face, with no repercussions. So....

Who?
Why?
Where?
How? (Dragon punch, discus punch, punching with a fist caked in wasps, etc)

[Ramsay]

my dad
hes a ****
the face
punch with a fist caked with barbed wire,wasps and a lump of poop

[Stu]

http://www.sssst.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/Robbie-Williams.jpg

And I wouldn't say anything. No words, just physical action.

Actually, that was just to crowbar a Day Today quote in there. I'd tell him that he's not allowed to use the assault on his face as the basis for some kind of pathetic tortured genius act, like how he ruined that hilarious footage of someone running onstage and pushing him into the orchestra pit by weeping in the dressing room afterwoods and doing the whole "What makes a human being do that to another human? Have I done something wrong?!" attention seeking bullshit.

Take the fist and shut the **** up.

[Ramsay]

yeah robbie williams is a tit

[Novo]

Who? Neil Lennon
Why? because he's a disgusting thug
Where? In the center circle of Ibrox
How? 2o7A3rMN6Co

[Beastie]

http://www.sssst.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/Robbie-Williams.jpg

And I wouldn't say anything. No words, just physical action.

Actually, that was just to crowbar a Day Today quote in there. I'd tell him that he's not allowed to use the assault on his face as the basis for some kind of pathetic tortured genius act, like how he ruined that hilarious footage of someone running onstage and pushing him into the orchestra pit by weeping in the dressing room afterwoods and doing the whole "What makes a human being do that to another human? Have I done something wrong?!" attention seeking bullshit.

Take the fist and shut the **** up.

I bet Laura will be over the moon that you said him! lol

[Stu]

I'm now bitterly dissapointed I forgot James Corden & Chris Moyles. I'd love a two for one deal on them. A series of swift jabs in front of all their swell celebrity chums resulting in either severe comas on their behalf or massive dissapointment on mine.

[Kerry]

Jodie Marsh, straight in the nose (it needs straightening anyway) for being a total slapper and then wondering why people hate her. Plus, when people do say they hate her, she flips and can't understand why

I (stupidly) read her autobiography. It took me all of a day to get through, such was the "..... and then I shagged him and then I shagged him.... but I'm really clever but I was bullied at school.... and then I shagged him......" Lost count how many blokes had been through her.

She claims women are jealous of her. At least she's good at jokes

[Beastie]

My preference....

http://img.metro.co.uk/i/pix/2008/07/cherylperformGF_450x555.jpg

Especially after what she did to that toilet attendant! :nono:

[InOne]

Ian Brady (Don't care if he's an old man)

[Princess]

I bet Laura will be over the moon that you said him! lol

Yes! It saves me having to post! Good choice Stu :hugesmile:

[Beastie]

Yes! It saves me having to post! Good choice Stu :hugesmile:

:laugh:

To be honest. There is probably something else I would do to Chezza Cole before punching her in the face. But I will leave that explanation for another night!

[Shaun]

I would ask the genie to momentarily turn my first into the hammer of Thor. During a thunderstorm I would appear at the window of my victim, smash through it, and slam my victim through a wall. I would then leave.

My victim?

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_j7nO4iNpcsM/Sj-3IV0C2-I/AAAAAAAAFzE/Hf6H2CGw0_U/s320/perez-hilton.jpg

Because he is just an awful, awful person. There is not a single redeemable quality about him.

[Jords]

:laugh:

To be honest. There is probably something else I would do to Chezza Cole before punching her in the face. But I will leave that explanation for another night!

Que... 'If you could only shag ONE person then punch them in the face straight after'

[Beastie]

Que... 'If you could only shag ONE person then punch them in the face straight after'

You got it kid! :wink:

[Kerry]

Que... 'If you could only shag ONE person then punch them in the face straight after'

One way to stop her rolling over and snoring I suppose......

[Stu]

I would ask the genie to momentarily turn my first into the hammer of Thor. During a thunderstorm I would appear at the window of my victim, smash through it, and slam my victim through a wall. I would then leave.

My victim?

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_j7nO4iNpcsM/Sj-3IV0C2-I/AAAAAAAAFzE/Hf6H2CGw0_U/s320/perez-hilton.jpg

Because he is just an awful, awful person. There is not a single redeemable quality about him.
Nice choice that makes me think of this waste of DNA :

http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/pictures/2010/12/22/1293033060890/Louie-Spence-007.jpg

[Livia]

There is someone I would like to punch. That person is a member of this forum, so for fear of infraction I cannot say. When you consider the *****wits I have to deal with in real life on a daily basis, the fact that I would choose this particular person goes some way to explain what a kafin kup, a shmendrik and total momzer he is.

[Stu]

Is he on your world famous ignore list, by any chance?

Pretty nutty in any case. I wouldn't punch anyone on this forum past or present. I'm only seeing a limited, web based, trial version of their personality.

[Beastie]

There is someone I would like to punch. That person is a member of this forum, so for fear of infraction I cannot say. When you consider the *****wits I have to deal with in real life on a daily basis, the fact that I would choose this particular person goes some way to explain what a kafin kup, a shmendrik and total momzer he is.

Come on! Be bold. Name the name!

Doubt you will get infracted.

Although if I had to guess it would be Stu?

Shame!

[CharlieO]

http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/About/General/2010/3/3/1267634906068/Andrew-Stone-001.jpg

Why: he is the most annoying waste of human life on the planet.
Where: I don't care but I would like to just punch him so he can no longer speak.
How: most painful way possible.

[Beastie]

http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/About/General/2010/3/3/1267634906068/Andrew-Stone-001.jpg

Why: he is the most annoying waste of human life on the planet.
Where: I don't care but I would like to just punch him so he can no longer speak.
How: most painful way possible.


Andrew Stone? I don't mind him. However that picture of him looks like a punchable face!

[CharlieO]

Andrew Stone? I don't mind him. However that picture of him looks like a punchable face!

I just find him the most annoying person that can name and people will know.

[Suze]

http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/About/General/2010/3/3/1267634906068/Andrew-Stone-001.jpg

Why: he is the most annoying waste of human life on the planet.
Where: I don't care but I would like to just punch him so he can no longer speak.
How: most painful way possible.

He has the most gorgeous eyes, so for that he gets by from being the annoying tit he is.

As for punching a celeb, I might feel like doing so at times, but nah, I wouldn't do so.

[Alf]

who? - god
why? - he's a dick
where? - outside the pearly gates
how? - headbut

[Patrick]

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm

[Patrick]

Rihanna. :amazed:

Wait that's already been done...

[Zippy]

Peter Andre is the only celeb I really hate. Just so smarmy, deluded and fake.

I'd wish him dead if I didnt think it would elevate him to some higher status and bring on even loads more crass tabloid/gossip mag BS about him as if he were an A-list superstar. And endless repeats on ITV2.

[InOne]

Rihanna. :amazed:

Wait that's already been done...

How about Leona? :amazed:

Oh wait, that's been done as well

[Patrick]

Peter Andre is the only celeb I really hate. Just so smarmy, deluded and fake.

I'd wish him dead if I didnt think it would elevate him to some higher status and bring on even loads more crass tabloid/gossip mag BS about him as if he were an A-list superstar. And endless repeats on ITV2.

:joker::joker::joker:

[Stu]

Come on! Be bold. Name the name!

Doubt you will get infracted.

Although if I had to guess it would be Stu?

Shame!
There's something so absurd about not having the balls to name a name out of fear of causing trouble but instead of keeping it to yourself anyway just proudly proclaiming that it's someone from this forum.

Almost as bad as having to make clear to everyone on your signature that you have an ignore list.

[Niall]

Am I allowed to say Jedward or would I have to pick just one of them?

[Zippy]

Am I allowed to saw Jedward or would I have to pick just one of them?

Reminds me of a comment I posted last year about how I'd love to punch one of them just to see if the other one felt the pain.

[Niall]

Reminds me of a comment I posted last year about how I'd love to punch one of them just to see if the other one felt the pain.

Thats a good question actually. :laugh:

[Shaun]

-finds it a bit sad that someone would pick a forum member-

taking this place too seriously, methinks

[Stu]

Am I allowed to say Jedward or would I have to pick just one of them?
Like Zippy said I think ones a voodoo doll for the other. They both form half each of a really rubbish human being.

['Conor]

http://sham.mobile9.com/download/wmpreview/436/1263059346-2.jpg

[joeysteele]

I neither like or believe in violence of any kind,however because of my fury for not only committing some of the most awful murders and allowing a Mother to be tortured al these decades just wishing she could bury her son Keith properly,I would find it hard to refuse the chance to punch Ian Brady and if she were still here Myra Hindley too.
I agree with InOne on that one.

[seanraff07]

Chris Brown. Not even cause he hit Rihanna but just cause I think he's a wanker.

[BigBrotherfan4ever]

There's quite a few people i would love to punch, but the top of my list, would have to be Robbie Williams, cant stand the guy.

[seanraff07]

I'd love to punch Keith Lemon too

[Livia]

I'd love to punch Keith Lemon too

I would be happy to hold his arms while you punch him.

[King Gizzard]

http://www.londonisfunny.com/resized/page/Images/new_folder/jack_whitehall1.jpg

[Stu]

Excellent choice sir.

[Fetch The Bolt Cutters]

http://img.thesun.co.uk/multimedia/archive/00851/Aston_280_851306a.jpg

in the face with a crowbar

[Beso]

Derek riordon.

[KG.]

http://img.metro.co.uk/i/pix/2010/09/09/article-1284030097123-0B18F885000005DC-853449_636x340.jpg

[Beastie]

There's something so absurd about not having the balls to name a name out of fear of causing trouble but instead of keeping it to yourself anyway just proudly proclaiming that it's someone from this forum.

Almost as bad as having to make clear to everyone on your signature that you have an ignore list.

I know. It's sad. They might as well be upfront, name the name and don't beat around the bush!

[Redway]

There is someone I would like to punch. That person is a member of this forum, so for fear of infraction I cannot say. When you consider the *****wits I have to deal with in real life on a daily basis, the fact that I would choose this particular person goes some way to explain what a kafin kup, a shmendrik and total momzer he is.

That had better not be aimed at me. ;)

[Doogle]

This fat bitch at my school who smokes like 1000000000 fags a day, cos she's a bitch, in the face, with my hand in a glove so i don't get her germs.

[seanraff07]

I would be happy to hold his arms while you punch him.

Let's do this.

[seanraff07]

Derek riordon.

Riordan*... Typical deluded Jambo :bored:

Skacel and Kyle are at the top of my hitlist.

[Beso]

Riordan*... Typical deluded Jambo :bored:

Skacel and Kyle are at the top of my hitlist.



you would miss!

[Sawyer]

Bin Laden.

Oh wait...

[lostalex]

I'd get an infraction if i answered this question honestly.

[billy123]

who needs a genie just do it.