How many elephants?

[Kate!]

Elephants Jokes please?

How many Elephants could you get in an empty Mini?

http://t1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRW69l-imSPGA6ghWtvmdwoJWWUdO2wftddNqINkPJhB4GB979D
]
One, cos after that it wouldn't be empty. :p

[bananarama]

An Elephant and flea joke riddle:- A serious question with an answer too.

If it takes a yard and a half of tripe to make an Elephant a seal skin waistcoat what would it take to make a flea a suit

Answer: A bloody good taylor........

[Shaun]

Kate I love you but that's the worst joke I've ever heard and I've seen Scott's threads

[Ammi]

..why did the elephant fall out of the tree
because it was dead

..why did the second elephant fall out of the tree
it was glued to the first elephant

..why did the third elephant fall out of the tree
it thought it was a game

..why did the tree fall down
it thought it was an elephant

[Me. I Am Salman]

Ammi :laugh2::laugh2:

[Omah]

Q: How do you get an elephant into the fridge?
1. Open door.
2. Insert elephant.
3. Close door.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: How do you get a giraffe into the fridge?
1. Open door.
2. Remove elephant.
3. Insert giraffe.
4. Close door.

:joker:

[Jords]

..why did the elephant fall out of the tree
because it was dead

..why did the second elephant fall out of the tree
it was glued to the first elephant

..why did the third elephant fall out of the tree
it thought it was a game

..why did the tree fall down
it thought it was an elephant

:laugh3:

[Kate!]

Kate I love you but that's the worst joke I've ever heard and I've seen Scott's threads

:p pffft, its genius! :love:

What's grey, has a trunk, but is not an elephant?

A mouse going on holiday

Heheh.

[Shaun]

Ammi :laugh2:

Kate... not improving I'm afraid :p

here's a proper joke :hmph:

Ninastar

[Kate!]

Ammi :laugh2:

Kate... not improving I'm afraid :p

here's a proper joke :hmph:

Ninastar

Naughty Shaun :D

Right I'm on a mission now for the ultimate elephant joke.. I may be gone some time.

[Omah]

What did the grape say when the elephant stood on it?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine.

How can you tell the difference between a grape and an elephant?
Grapes are purple.

What did Jane say when he she saw the elephants coming over the hill?
“Look, here come the grapes!” (She was color blind.)

How can you tell the difference between a grape and an elephant if you’re color blind?
Dance on it for a while. If you don’t get any wine, it’s an elephant.

:pipe:

[Omah]

How do you know if there is an elephant in the pub?
His bike is outside.

How do you know if there are two elephants in the pub?
There’s a dent in the cross-bar.

How do you know if there are three elephants in the pub?
Stand on the bike and look in the window.

:laugh:

[Kate!]

Omah!! :laugh3:

- has visions of elephants playing pool in a pub! -

[Kate!]

http://t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQwpONSA339hiq3C6QHznwVkvBL-8vvHu_0OaXR1M2gGNgR6mVW

[Omah]

How do elephants climb an oak tree?

They sit on an acorn and wait for spring!

How do elephants get down from an oak tree?

They sit on a leaf and wait for fall!

:joker:

[Omah]

How do you get down from an elephant?

You don't - you get down from a duck!

:laugh:

[Omah]

Q: How many elephants will fit into a Mini? A: Four: Two in the front, two in the back. Q: How many giraffes will fit into a Mini? A: None. It's full of elephants. Q: How do you know there are two elephants in your refrigerator? A: You can hear giggling when the light goes out. Q: How do you know there are three elephants in your refrigerator? A: You can't close the door. Q: How do you know there are four elephants in your refrigerator? A: There's an empty Mini parked outside.:cheer2:

[Redway]

(1) Why did the elephant cross the road?

To get to the gym.

(2) Why did the elephant cry?

It was told it was too fat to use the gym.

(3) How many elephants can you fit into a 7-seater car?

Just its arse.

(4) Why did the elephant get someone to drive it to someone's house?

Because the fella it was seeing had an interest in big arses.

(5) How did the elephant get the money to hire a driver?

It was a prostitute beforehand because of the size of its arse and earned enough money to buy the whole world.

(6) Why did the elephant go to the pub afterwards?

Its size turned out to be a good thing after all.

(7) Why did the elephant attend a series of funerals after?

It wiped out the entire pub building and the people in it after it did a little dance.

(8) Why did the elephant cry afterwards?

Its size turned out to be a bad thing after all.

[Doogle]

Why did the elephant die?

It read this thread

[Redway]

Why did the elephant come back to life?

It realised everything said on this thread was all true and that it was all an overreaction.

[Kate!]

Wtf are you all on. :D