Suicide (Serious Debate)

[Emilee]

What are everyone's opinions on suicide?
Has anyone ever experienced someone close to them considering or commited suicide, and how did it effect you?
What should you say to someone considering suicide?
How would you deal with it?

Discuss....

[Psylocke]

A good friend of mine tried commiting suicide last week,i rang her up and screamed down the phone calling her a stupid selfish bitch,she was still in her hospital bed,and she was sick before this anyway,so the pills have done alot of damage.

I got quite upset today and range her again,and we had a long chat.

Suicide is utterly utterly wrong,stupid and selfish.

Ps.its weird you brought this up,i was contemplating writing about it

[Lauren]

Nothing you say can ever "make it right" for some that is seriously considering committing suicide. All you can do as a friend is to show them that the effects of them doing this is widespread - let them know you care.
Often, suicide can be a cry for help, they need someone to know that you care for them and losing them would be a terrible thing to happen.

Try not to say "Don't be silly" or "Don't do anything stupid" - because this is a form of invalidation and doesn't help diffuse a situation.

Talking about problems can really help with someone considering this, and let them know you are there for them to talk to whenever they wish, and you will never judge them on anything.

[Emilee]

Yer i just needed to get it off my chest, and find out if anyone had gone through the same experience. Suicide is the worst thing ever, it is more traumatic for the people around, who have to deal with wondering if they will actually go through with it. It is the most destressing situation ever.

P.S: Sorry to hear about your friend hope she is alright. :flowers:

[Lauren]

Suicide is the most distressing situation ever. It doesn't just hurt everybody around the "victim" but it also highlights the severe pain and trauma of the person, who genuinely had to turn to death to get away from life.

[Emilee]

Originally posted by Lauren
Nothing you say can ever "make it right" for some that is seriously considering committing suicide. All you can do as a friend is to show them that the effects of them doing this is widespread - let them know you care.
Often, suicide can be a cry for help, they need someone to know that you care for them and losing them would be a terrible thing to happen.

Try not to say "Don't be silly" or "Don't do anything stupid" - because this is a form of invalidation and doesn't help diffuse a situation.

Talking about problems can really help with someone considering this, and let them know you are there for them to talk to whenever they wish, and you will never judge them on anything.

Thanks Lauren, that was really good information. Today i spent all afternoon in connexions talking to a consultant with about 5 other people and the person thinking about commiting suicede. It was the most depressing destressing
situation ever. Talking about it really did help i think. I'm just really hoping nothing happens. :bawling:

[easypeasy]

http://www.samaritans.org.uk/

[Lauren]

Originally posted by easypeasy
http://www.samaritans.org.uk/

Actually, another good point.
If you're close friends with them, after showing them you care - give them the number to Samaritans and other helplines. Once they have talked to someone they love, they may want to talk to a stranger about it - to get it off their chest.

[easypeasy]

sometimes its easier to talk to a stranger Lauren.

[andybigbro]

Sorry to hear about your friends psylocke

[bonnie43uk]

my workmate hung himself last year after a row with his girlfriend. I spoke to him on the friday, and was laughing and joking with him .. 24 hours later he'd hung himself. i was TOTALLY shocked!!! people say its the cowards way out, but i think going ahead with something as drastic as taking your own life takes emmense courage.
Catholics dont help matters by saying its one of the worst sins a human can commit, they say you will go to hell. Thats what i was brought up to believe as a child. Quite a guilt trip.

[lily.]

If someone is really going to commit suicide there's little or nothing you can do to stop them.

In my experience, when someone actually goes through with it, often their loved ones had no idea they were even thinking of it.

Something that's hard to deal with is the "attention seeking" behaviour some people display where they tell their loved ones they are going to commit suicide when they actually have no intention of doing so. That is heartbreaking for everyone around.

[The_Hitman]

Originally posted by Emilee
What would you say if someone was seriousy considering comiting suicide? What would you do to try and stop them from doing it, and make everything alright?:puzzled:

Id just say listen, sort your head out, theres no use crying over spilt milk.

Oh and, dont do it.

[BigSister]

I dont think there was anything i could do or say because like Linda said if they want to do the deed then their head is set on doing it

[Lauren]

Originally posted by BigSister
I dont think there was anything i could do or say because like Linda said if they want to do the deed then their head is set on doing it

I don't agree.

Personally, I know someone that attempted suicide once and it was a failed attempt. After realising people loved them and wanted them around (and counseling) this same person is here with us today.
It may seem like a lost cause but simply talking to someone can save a life.

[Sunny_01]

Suicide is a choice, who are we to remove that choice from people. When someone is so depressed that they actually consider and follow through taking their own lives I cant help but feel so sad for them.

Suicide is not a solution, it is an end before a solution can be found. A very dear friend of mine chose to take her own life last year, at first I was sad, then angry then guilty that I had not realised that she felt so bad, then I realised it was not about me, my sadness was mine but her nightmare that made her feel she had no options was hers.

I agree with Stropz, Those that make the poor me I want to die attempts well that is generally a form of attention seeking. Those that truly want to die just get on and do it. They tie up loose ends and very rarely do it spontaneously it is generally thought out and planned to the last second of their life.

Many people who for whatever reason fail suicide attempts are genuine in their desire to die at that particular moment but is rarely a thought out planned serious attempt. They generally do go on to do well when they gain the support they feel they need

[Lauren]

Originally posted by Sunny_01
Those that make the poor me I want to die attempts well that is generally a form of attention seeking.

However, you then have to consider why these people feel "threatening" suicide will give them the attention they need. These people clearly feel useless and need attention in this way, and once again I pity people who feel like they constantly need their feelings to be validated by friends.
:sad:

[Sophii3x]

My best friend has never considered suicide, but has cut herself.

I was just screaming at her on the phone to stop
She used glass and when she came into school the next day the cuts were really deep

[Lauren]

Originally posted by Sophii3x
My best friend has never considered suicide, but has cut herself.

I was just screaming at her on the phone to stop
She used glass and when she came into school the next day the cuts were really deep

Cutting oneself is usually a cry for help. Your friend wants people to take notice of her feelings, there is something she dislikes about herself/her life and she feels she wants to talk to someone.
As a friend, all you can do is talk to her about her feelings - show her you care.

Also, give her the number of childline (0800 1111). There is counsellors on the phone 24 hours a day 7 days a week, for free (And the name "Childline" won't appear on her phonebill for her parents to see). Sometimes it is easier for people to talk to strangers about their problems and often this helps - it will also show her that as a friend you care about her well-being.

:thumbs:

[Sophii3x]

Originally posted by Lauren
Originally posted by Sophii3x
My best friend has never considered suicide, but has cut herself.

I was just screaming at her on the phone to stop
She used glass and when she came into school the next day the cuts were really deep

Cutting oneself is usually a cry for help. Your friend wants people to take notice of her feelings, there is something she dislikes about herself/her life and she feels she wants to talk to someone.
As a friend, all you can do is talk to her about her feelings - show her you care.

Also, give her the number of childline (0800 1111). There is counsellors on the phone 24 hours a day 7 days a week, for free (And the name "Childline" won't appear on her phonebill for her parents to see). Sometimes it is easier for people to talk to strangers about their problems and often this helps - it will also show her that as a friend you care about her well-being.

:thumbs:

Thanks for the advice Lauren
She ok now, but if she starts again I will give her the advise you just have

And also I know what it's like
I did it to myself last year when i got bullied in school
But I'm ok now:bigsmile:

[lily.]

Originally posted by Sunny_01
... Those that truly want to die just get on and do it. They tie up loose ends and very rarely do it spontaneously it is generally thought out and planned to the last second of their life.


I'm amazed at just how many details are attended to in some cases. I know of people who have planned for weeks and made sure every single small detail was attended to. It's actually quite disturbing to think that even in their emotional state, they are capable of such intricate planning.

However, it does make you realise that nobody can stop someone from taking their own life. If they are set on doing it, they will do it regardless of intervention.

[Emilee]

And also I know what it's like
I did it to myself last year when i got bullied in school
But I'm ok now:bigsmile:

Aww Sophie. I was bullied aswell at school (in year 7).
Glad your O.K now :thumbs::flowers:

[lily.]

Yeah, I'm also glad you got past that stage Soph. It's my worst nightmare for my children to be honest.. Bullying.. cuz schools just don't deal with it in my opinion...

*oh, another thread idea...*

[Lauren]

Soph, cutting yourself isn't anything to be ashamed of - not at all. You got past that point in your life, and you fought it - you should be proud that you don't do it anymore and it takes strength for you to get past something so big in your life.
:thumbs: Well done.

[lily.]

I agree.. and it's good that you can talk about it now. You are obviously a much stronger person now to have overcome it.

[Sunny_01]

Originally posted by Stropz
Originally posted by Sunny_01
... Those that truly want to die just get on and do it. They tie up loose ends and very rarely do it spontaneously it is generally thought out and planned to the last second of their life.


I'm amazed at just how many details are attended to in some cases. I know of people who have planned for weeks and made sure every single small detail was attended to. It's actually quite disturbing to think that even in their emotional state, they are capable of such intricate planning.

However, it does make you realise that nobody can stop someone from taking their own life. If they are set on doing it, they will do it regardless of intervention.


I was shocked when I realised the extent of planning that had went into my friends suicide. She had even chosen her own poems for her funeral and the order of service! She had made sure that it was "safe" for her to do it when she did by giving off an image of hey I am ok, and actually I think she was. I think she was ok because she knew she did not have to get on with anything else in this life that she had often found terribly unbearable. I can imagine that she felt relieved while she was planning.

As for those that cry for help, I agree they do need help, and those that harm themselves also need help.

Having worked with young people who self harm I find that by encouraging them to be safe while harming was an important part of their support. Encourage them to have a first aid kit with things like steri strips in. No you are not saying it is ok, you are ensuring that they dont panic and end up with dirty infected wounds. They are going to cut themselves anyway so let them do it safely. Also Childline can be difficult to get through to and sometimes finding the right words on the phone can be difficult. People could also try Connexions Direct. It is also a national helpline for young people but offers web chat and email facilities as well as voice calls. www.connexions-direct.com You can log on without giving a real name and chat to someone condientially.

[Emilee]

I was shocked when I realised the extent of planning that had went into my friends suicide. She had even chosen her own poems for her funeral and the order of service! She had made sure that it was "safe" for her to do it when she did by giving off an image of hey I am ok, and actually I think she was. I think she was ok because she knew she did not have to get on with anything else in this life that she had often found terribly unbearable. I can imagine that she felt relieved while she was planning.

OMG! that was so sad it made me cry. Im so sorry. xx

[Sunny_01]

Dont be sorry Emilee - it was a choice she made which is the message I was try to get across.

In all situations I am pro-choice no matter how it upsets me I have to try and look outside the box and remember that it isnt always happening to me, it is happening to the person who has made the choice.

[Ruth]

I don't think anyone can condemn any person who chooses to take their own life. People say it is selfish and nasty - how does that help though? I know people who have committed or attempted suicide, and it is just awful, but to condemn someone for it is wrong (in my eyes). If someone feels suicidal, they must be going through hell. I would always try and help anyone who is feeling that way, but if it is their choice, you have to respect that.

[Scrunchy]

Originally posted by Ruth
I don't think anyone can condemn any person who chooses to take their own life. People say it is selfish and nasty - how does that help though? I know people who have committed or attempted suicide, and it is just awful, but to condemn someone for it is wrong (in my eyes). If someone feels suicidal, they must be going through hell. I would always try and help anyone who is feeling that way, but if it is their choice, you have to respect that.

I have to say, I agree with you on this. If somebody feels driven to end their life, then, more than likely, their reasons are sound.

Sometimes people threaten suicide as a way of seeking attention. Fine, obviously they feel the need to demand a lot of attention. I don't condone that, but maybe we should listen to their distorted pleas, rather than rebuke them for such an attempt.

I believe that, when linked with euthanasia, suicide is entirely acceptible. I find is shocking that people aren't allowed to have the choice over whether they live or not. You may be able to tell that I'm not religious, but everybodies life is their own. Ultimately, if they don't take control, who will? And as such, if they feel that suicide is what they truly want to do, who is anybody else to stop them and say it's wrong. The condition of terminal illness or suffering just emphasises this. Dignitas, the Swiss suicide charity, is a movement that I am in favour of, and would personally want to see a branch legalised in the United Kingdom.

The topic of self-harm is one that I have given a deal of thought to and have some, arguably controversial, thoughts regarding it. Personally, I am of the belief that, as long as it isn't life threatening, it should be relatively accepted on a smaller scale. As a way of relieving emotional tension it is very effective, hence why a large number of people do it. Where some people self-harm on a small scale, others punch walls in anger or frustration. Effectively, this is almost the same, a sudden release of pent-up emotion. Admittedly, self-harm has the potential to develop into a psychological addiction in some cases, and, if taken to an extreme, can have damaging effects.

Contrary to popular belief, self-harm is anything but a "cry for help". This is made obvious by the way that the majority of people who self-harm go out of their way to conceal their wounds, rather than flaunting them to their peers. As it is, people who are known to self-harm are usually stereotyped and judged for their actions. This can aid the transformation of self-harm into a dependancy and addiction, rather than an occasional release, and from there it can develop damaging traits.

Personally, I think a more leniant approach to those who self-harm on a minor scale would be appropriate. Those who take it to a more serious level should be encouraged not to do so, but as long as it remains relatively low-key tolerance could well be a better way of discouraging it than immediately alienating them with counselling and different treatment.


Feel free to comment on anything I've said... I welcome responses and alternative viewpoints :spin2:

Apologies for the length of this, well done if you've actually read it.

Whether you wish to believe me or not, I have never attempted or considered suicide, and never self-harmed :spin2:


Scrunchy

[Magic]

I generally think that suicide is bad, but it all depends on the relevant circumstances.


Sometimes people threaten suicide as a way of seeking attention. Fine, obviously they feel the need to demand a lot of attention. I don't condone that, but maybe we should listen to their distorted pleas, rather than rebuke them for such an attempt.


I agree with this statement, and i think we all saw a issue of it earlier in the month. I think those that claim suicide, can often feel they need to be noticed, which often leads people to suicide.

Does that make sense?

[Ann]

now then with me it was a very bad teenage life as my mum was going out with this fella and he used to hit my mum all the time and of course it really got to me so only once i tryed to take all my tablets but then my dad walked in and soon took my tablets off of me and he then sat me down and i told him everything that idiot did to my mum so in the end my dad endered up beating him til he moved out plus he said to my dad i didnt know i was doing it my dad then told him where to get off in swearing which oi wont mention but from then on ive had a cool life and ive got a lovely family and you lot as my friends but it makes me shiver on how some people just do this for an excuse they should be thankful for what they have :thumbs:

[Billy]

aww Ann thats sad

[Magic]

Originally posted by Ann
now then with me it was a very bad teenage life as my mum was going out with this fella and he used to hit my mum all the time and of course it really got to me so only once i tryed to take all my tablets but then my dad walked in and soon took my tablets off of me and he then sat me down and i told him everything that idiot did to my mum so in the end my dad endered up beating him til he moved out plus he said to my dad i didnt know i was doing it my dad then told him where to get off in swearing which oi wont mention but from then on ive had a cool life and ive got a lovely family and you lot as my friends but it makes me shiver on how some people just do this for an excuse they should be thankful for what they have :thumbs:

I COMPLETLY agree with your end point Ann.

I am sorry to hear about your child hood

[Ann]

it was at the time but i was pleased my dad turned up when he did and he made me see reason that theres more to life then ending it :hug:

[GiRTh]

A few years ago I lost my job and came perilously close to losing my home. I was extremely depressed. I contemplated ending it all in fact I’d say I gave it some very serious thought. I talked of how everything I’d ever worked for had been taken away from. People talked me out of it, encouraged me to make a fresh start etc. I didn’t lose my home and I’m now in a much happier place. I still don’t know what would have happened if I had lost my home. I would have definitely felt like there was nothing to live for.

[Ann]

aww im glad you sorted that out thats great to hear Girth :thumbs:

[GiRTh]

Thanks Ann.:hug:

EDIT: That experience is probably one of the reasons why I'm now so cynical.

[Ann]

your welcome :hug:

[Sarah.]

It's a terrible thing but the thing that annoys me the most is the people who convince themselves they have nothing to live for, and it's most likely all for attention, like they would constantly tell people about it and so on.

I've experienced it once in my life and I'm glad to say that part of my life is in the past now. If you are depressed and thinking about suicide then the best thing to do is tell someone you trust, it really helps you :)

[Ann]

very well said too there thats why i told my dad everything that idiot did to my mum so my dad soon sorted him out in the end and im glad you are now well mate good on you too :wink:

[GiRTh]

Indeed. It's good to talk about your troubles.

[Retroman]

To anyone who claims suicide is a sin, or is wrong, then here's a good quote:

"They tell us that suicide is the greatest piece of cowardice... that suicide is wrong; when it is quite obvious that there is nothing in the world to which every man has a more unassailable title than to his own life and person."
- Arthur Schopenhauer

Which would be my opinion on suicide, if that person genuinely wants to die due to too much suffering in their lives.

Some people however become trapped, and simply can't help themselves...and if someone was to make their lives better, they'd change their minds about suicide in an instant.

But then again, if there isn't anyone in their life to help them, they'd surely fall into the first category. And if there is someone in their life to help them, hopefully that help will work and everything will be fine.

I do have a negative opinion of people who throw the word "suicide" around whenever they're feeling angry or upset. They have no intention of killing themselves but broadcast it for attention and a quick "cheer me up"

The only person I knew who commited suicide was my ex girlfriends uncle, who hung himself one day. I respect his right to do so if he can't stand living anymore, but the devastation he left behind for his wife inparticular, wasn't all that forgivable.

[~Kizwiz~]

Since I was about 14 I have always had very troubled thoughts, that I dont deserve to be here....it comes as goes and at times it can be crippling and things just never seem like they will get better.

I have suffered from depression since an early age and its only been diagnosed recently and with work from a wonderful health team things are working.

To have suicidal thoughts are horrid, you are fully aware that you could hurt those close to you but at that time its just too black to see clearly.

This year has been a very rough year and if I am truly honest if Red hasnt been with me... things might have been very very different. However, the love that he gives me and that our children give is a miracle worker.

[Sunny_01]

Girth - the main thing bud is you came through it, tough as it was you did it and you are here to tell us you made it. Depression is awful, it is debilitating and unless you have experienced it first hand it is difficult to walk in someones shoes for a single moment.

Kiz - I have lived in your world for many years as well, dark thoughts are a part of my condition. I am lucky that my husband and family are all aware of when I am having a slip (as is Red Moon clever so and so) and they all (even Red) offer me love, kindness and support. I have an amazing support system of professionals and family that allow me to maintain a pretty normal life. I am lucky that I can function at the level I do, many people with my condition are not able to and often end up committing suicide.

[\PJ/]

Ann what a tradergy,suicide is a terrible thing and sometimes what gets me fired up how they use it in songs so genrally.Usally in RnB/hip hop.

[Ann]

aww thanks pj but he soon got the revenge back as my dad and brothers beat him up then he soon left and he was just an idiot as he would only do it when he was drunk but the next morning he would say that he couldnt remember a thing but gladly my mum is re-married to a respectable dad who just took us all on as his own children and hes lovely too :colour:

[GiRTh]

Good on your mum Ann. Spousal abuse is terrible. :hug:

[supernoodles!]

I have a suicide story to share with you all,i actually know 5 people who have commited suicide.A work collegue of my dads,my mams cousin (my second cousin),my dads work collegues daughter,a young man who lived opposite me in my street and also a fmaily friend.

Earlier this year (it was the night of shabnams eviction to be exact-odd I remember that) I was sitting by my computor which is infront of the window in the main bedroom of my house which faces onto the rest of my street.Anyway It was about four pm and i noticed a paramedic entering the house,I became suspicious when he left the door wide open for over 20 minutes and later an abulance also turned up.
About an hour and a half later C.I.D turned up at my door and told my mam that the young man (who was only 23 at the time) had commited suicide over a week ago and his suicide had gone unnoticed up until now as his grandmother (whom he lived with) had been on holiday.Earlier that day she had returned from her holiday only to find her grandson hanging from the staircase.I had to answer some questions such as when did I last see him,did I speak to him recently,what did I know about him etc.
About three hours later I was shocked to see his dead body being carried out of the front door on a stretcher,yes he was ina body bag ,but this guy was quite big and I could actually see that he was wearing dark tracksuit bottoms and some sort of jacket.The road sepearting my house and his is literally 6 or 7 steps away from my front door and you just dont expect to see this sort of thing right infront of your eyes

[Ann]

Originally posted by GiRTh
Good on your mum Ann. Spousal abuse is terrible. :hug: aww thanks Girth :hug:

[Mrluvaluva]

I think suicide is quite a courageous thing to carry out, and a person must be pretty desperate to actually go through with it. They must see no other way of getting out of the pain they are in. On the other hand, it can be quite a cowardly thing to do. The "easy option" if you like. Just end it all because things are so bad. It is an easier way out than to try and get things back on track. IMO, it depends on the situation a person is in. A broken heart can lead a person to do irrational things for instance.

It is a selflish act too. Imagine the pain that is left with other people to deal with, especially if you have a spouse, siblings and family. Friends too. It remains with them for the rest of their lives. Questions that are unanswered. Self torment on other people.

It may be a cry for help, but sometimes a cry can go too far.

You may be able to help people by talking to them, and reassuring them, and in a lot of cases, it does help for them to speak to someone impartial, like a doctor, or a councilllor. The main thing is to try and get them as much help as possible, in order to avert their demise.

[Jack]

Originally posted by Mrluvaluva
I think suicide is quite a courageous thing to carry out, and a person must be pretty desperate to actually go through with it. They must see no other way of getting out of the pain they are in. On the other hand, it can be quite a cowardly thing to do. The "easy option" if you like. Just end it all because things are so bad. It is an easier way out than to try and get things back on track. IMO, it depends on the situation a person is in. A broken heart can lead a person to do irrational things for instance.

It is a selfless act too. Imagine the pain that is left with other people to deal with, especially if you have a spouse, siblings and family. Friends too. It remains with them for the rest of their lives. Questions that are unanswered. Self torment on other people.

It may be a cry for help, but sometimes a cry can go too far.

You may be able to help people by talking to them, and reassuring them, and in a lot of cases, it does help for them to speak to someone impartial, like a doctor, or a councilllor. The main thing is to try and get them as much help as possible, in order to avert their demise.

Do you mean selfish?

[Mrluvaluva]

Originally posted by Jack

Do you mean selfish?

Yes sorry. I will amend, but it is also a selfless act too.

[Jackie]

Originally posted by Mrluvaluva
I think suicide is quite a courageous thing to carry out, and a person must be pretty desperate to actually go through with it. They must see no other way of getting out of the pain they are in. On the other hand, it can be quite a cowardly thing to do. The "easy option" if you like. Just end it all because things are so bad. It is an easier way out than to try and get things back on track. IMO, it depends on the situation a person is in. A broken heart can lead a person to do irrational things for instance.

It is a selflish act too. Imagine the pain that is left with other people to deal with, especially if you have a spouse, siblings and family. Friends too. It remains with them for the rest of their lives. Questions that are unanswered. Self torment on other people.

It may be a cry for help, but sometimes a cry can go too far.

You may be able to help people by talking to them, and reassuring them, and in a lot of cases, it does help for them to speak to someone impartial, like a doctor, or a councilllor. The main thing is to try and get them as much help as possible, in order to avert their demise.


I agree its the people left behind that suffers the most,when my daughter died i never once thought about suicide,i couldnt imagine my family without me,and how they would cope.But some people are so desperate theres no other way out for them.

[Mrluvaluva]

Yeah. You have to think about what it would do to others. You have to carry on. I suppose it depends on how strong the person is though?

[natjake2504]

I dont beleive in it and think anyone that considers it are selfish and cowards but at the same time you get alot of people killing themselves while they have had mental health problems so is this the NHS failing them!!!!!!

[northcircular]

just like what has happened to these people from (bridgend) when you make the final decision to end your own life; your fate is in your own hands; from the moment you take a drugs overdose or slash your wrists or hang yourself or any other way you choose to end your life; basically it is up to the individual to choose.

anyone can get depressed at any time in their lives. sometimes it can be losing a loved one or a stressful situation which you can no longer handle or basically just getting fed up with life in general. you could find yourself losing your house; going bankcrupt; even going to a casino and gambling away everything you have got then walk out and shoot yourself. the reasons can be many; but the choice is yours at the time you decide.

the best thing to do is when you are in that situation whereby you are feeling suicidal is to think of what makes you happy in life. it's funny how the little pleasures in life which we seem to forget about because we are busy living a pretty routine lifestyle and there are many things which we fail to do; as we just don't bother anymore.

things like (riding a bicycle) or (going to a theme park) or (going to a zoo) I could list hundreds of examples of pleasurable things which many of us just don't do; either because we feel we have moved on from those sorts of pleasures; or like I said earlier; we get into a routine and tend to leave behind those past pleasures from past times.

I find it sad when I hear of teenagers who are still at school or at college/uni/doing a course; and some choose to kill themselves at such an early age; because they just can't handle the pressures of life. there is always light at the edge of the tunnel and no matter how bad you ever feel; there is always help available. even if it means joining a forum or if you don't have access to a computer; there is always the (samaritans) they will always listen to you and there job is to help you; but ultimately you have to find it within yourself to keep your chin up and get through those bad times and if life seems hard or you are a victim of bullying or even if you are having problems with your family; there is always help available and if one door doesn't open; find another that does.

suicide is something which is always available to all of us; but it's not the answer. life is precious; so enjoy every moment. if someone wishes to upset you then find a way past them. take it from me; it's yourself and the people you care about and care about you that is most important. but if someone is thinking of suicide; then offer them the right advice if you can or point them in the right direction.

if they say (don't pity me; leave me alone) then you may have to get help for them without asking them.

[Sunny_01]

Originally posted by natjake2504
I dont beleive in it and think anyone that considers it are selfish and cowards but at the same time you get alot of people killing themselves while they have had mental health problems so is this the NHS failing them!!!!!!

I respect your right to this opinion but certainly dont share it. If you have truly read some of the things people have said in this thread you might think differently about things and may show a little tact with your response.

I agree with your end comment about the NHS failing people with mental health issues BUT I also know how hard it is to get someone with mental health problems to engage with professionals. I suppose it is a viscious circle really. Services are limited and people dont want to be labelled, maybe the way people are approached and supported could change to lift some of the stigma from menatl health treatment.

[Ruth]

I don't think anyone can condemn someone for committing suicide - how do we know what other people are going through? I do feel sorry for the people left behind, who often feel guilty and wonder if there's anything they could have done (I believe that there usually is nothing that they could have done).

People who are feeling suicidal need help and understanding, not someone calling them selfish and cowardly. It's all too easy to make judgements when it's not you in that situation.

We were actually talking about this at work the other day...everyone should have the right to do what they want with their own life, and if that is the case, and someone is determined to commit suicide - should someone intervene? If I thought a friend or family member of mine was feeling suicidal, I would definitely want to help in any way I could, but I know that the Samaritans are not allowed to act if they believe that someone is at risk of killing themselves - should we let people kill themselves, if that is what they want?

[Sunny_01]

Yep you are right there Ruth the samaritans are not in the position to talk you out of suicide, they will support you through a difficult time but also support your right to choose. They do hope that their support will allow people to feel a little less helpless and more in control of their emotions and in turn less likely to attempt or to actually succeed at suicide.

I have been one of those friends left behind and watched the suffering that her family went through, however I still respect her decision. That of course wasnt my immediate reaction, my immediate reaction was one of complete anger, but that feeling quickly changed.