[Tony Montana]

A hospital has been forced to apologise after a nurse called a transgender woman dressed in an Ann Summers Mrs Claus outfit a man.
Chantelle Saunders, 34, said she was "very, very upset" by the remark from a nurse at Royal Devon and Exeter hospital.She claims the nurse said "er... it's a man" and replied with "erggh" after Chantelle told her she is actually transgender.
Chantelle, from Exeter, is transitioning from male to female and had visited the hospital on Christmas Eve last year in full make-up, wig and costume to spread some festive cheer.
In a letter the hospital told Chantelle that the nurse thought she was male because "you had a full beard and were dressed in male attire".
But bosses have now apologised and said they are keen to speak to Chantelle to see if they can "explore how we can resolve any remaining issues she has". Chantelle said she has never had a beard, even before she began her three year transition, and blasted the nurse's actions.
She said: "I was very, very upset. I'm a transgender woman - transitioning from male to female.
"I went to visit my friend in hospital on Christmas Eve on one of the RD&E ward.
"She was in having an operation and there was a nurse in the cubicle. I said 'Happy Christmas' and the nurse replied 'Er... it's a man'.
"I said 'No I'm a transgender woman' and she said 'errgh'.
"I complained at first to the NHS PALS (Patient Advice and Liaison Service) and I received a comment back from the assistant head of nursing who said they apologised for saying 'Happy Christmas Sir'.
"But I appealed and made another complaint about that because they didn't speak to me or speak to my two witnesses."Now I have had a letter back from the deputy chief executive/chief nurse which basically says that the nurse involved has no recollection of making the comment - but again they never spoke to my two witnesses."
The letter said: "All our staff undergo equality and diversity training as standard. Any form of discrimination is unacceptable to us as an organisation.
"If a patient is admitted we always enquire how they wish to be addressed (Mr, Mrs or by first name)'.
"The bit of the letter that has really upset me is this bit, it says 'However when a person is visited we are advised to address the person as they are seen.
"In your case I understand you had a full beard and were dressed in male attire."
Chantelle said if the hospital had contacted her witnesses they would all testify that she was dressed as a woman, as she has for the last three years since she began transitioning and taking female hormones.
She said: "I am always dressed as a woman. I had full make-up. I had my hair on. I am on female hormones and do not have a beard.

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-new...calls-14252377

[bots]

i can understand confusion on a busy ward when someone is dressed up as Santa

Yeah, it's unfortunate, but I think this is more of a publicity crusade more than anything else.

[chuff me dizzy]

I smell a rat here Why would the nurse say "Sir" ? Ive never had anyone in the same position call me "Madam " you say "Merry Christmas" no need for the title

[Lostie!]

She claims the nurse said "er... it's a man" and replied with "erggh" after Chantelle told her she is actually transgender

[Livia]

Good that they take the time to make a grovelling apology to a transsexual woman, while elderly people are sitting in their own piss and not being given enough to eat or drink. Nice to see the NHS has it's ducks in a row when it comes to grovelling apologies and who gets them.

[chuff me dizzy]

Originally Posted by Livia

Good that they take the time to make a grovelling apology to a transsexual woman, while elderly people are sitting in their own piss and not being given enough to eat or drink. Nice to see the NHS has it's ducks in a row when it comes to grovelling apologies and who gets them.

The world has gone mad Livia, time the NHS got its priorities right !!

[user104658]

Originally Posted by Livia

Good that they take the time to make a grovelling apology to a transsexual woman, while elderly people are sitting in their own piss and not being given enough to eat or drink. Nice to see the NHS has it's ducks in a row when it comes to grovelling apologies and who gets them.

I mean I agree to an extent but surely it should be that care, compassion and apology is forthcoming to ALL... nit that "if the most deserving don't get one then NO ONE gets one".

[Livia]

Originally Posted by Toy Soldier

I mean I agree to an extent but surely it should be that care, compassion and apology is forthcoming to ALL... nit that "if the most deserving don't get one then NO ONE gets one".

My late husband and his mates dressed up in women's clothes for a couple of drunken stag nights... you know what straight blokes are like, can't wait to get into a pair of tights and a sock-stuffed bra. How is anyone supposed to tell the difference between them, and a man who identifies as a woman but is still physically, a man. And really, is it worth a news story and a grovelling public apology?

No.

[joeysteele]

Originally Posted by Livia

Good that they take the time to make a grovelling apology to a transsexual woman, while elderly people are sitting in their own piss and not being given enough to eat or drink. Nice to see the NHS has it's ducks in a row when it comes to grovelling apologies and who gets them.

Very forcefully put.
I'm in full agreement

I was visiting a relative in Hospital a couple of weeks ago.

Another old person in the bay with them, said they needed the toilet.

The Nurse said, we only took you an hour ago, we are busy now, we'll take you in half an hour.
Staggering and unacceptable.

[Matthew.]

Originally Posted by joeysteele

I was visiting a relative in Hospital a couple of weeks ago.

Another old person in the bay with them, said they needed the toilet.

The Nurse said, we only took you an hour ago, we are busy now, we'll take you in half an hour.
Staggering and unacceptable.

Are you serious

That’s disgraceful

[joeysteele]

Originally Posted by Matthew.

Are you serious

That’s disgraceful

Deadly serious.
I and the person visiting with me have raised the issue which will likely get lip service only, it disregarded as we are not that person's next if kin or relative.

It is actually, although a minority of instances, terrifying what loved ones are treated like in some Hospitals by some staff.

I'm sorry but for me being overworked and understaffed doesn't cut it with me as an excuse for the removal of anyone's dignity.

[AnnieK]

Originally Posted by joeysteele

Very forcefully put.
I'm in full agreement

I was visiting a relative in Hospital a couple of weeks ago.

Another old person in the bay with them, said they needed the toilet.

The Nurse said, we only took you an hour ago, we are busy now, we'll take you in half an hour.
Staggering and unacceptable.

I agree its unacceptable but the nurses could have been dispensing time critical meds, assisting other patients, the lady who said she needed the toilet could say that every 5 minutes....nurses are stretched to the limits due to budget cuts, there could have been.more pressing things.on the ward at that time, they cannot split themselves in half.

The day my mum was told she had terminal cancer and had weeks to live, bearing in mind at her admission to hospital, she thought she had pulled something in her back, when we left for the evening, she had a massive panic attack, the nurses sat with her to calm her breathing and did not leave her until she was calm. If another patient had needed the bathroom they would have had a judgement call to make....its not always that they are uncaring, sometimes they need to prioritise.

[joeysteele]

Originally Posted by AnnieK

I agree its unacceptable but the nurses could have been dispensing time critical meds, assisting other patients, the lady who said she needed the toilet could say that every 5 minutes....nurses are stretched to the limits due to budget cuts, there could have been.more pressing things.on the ward at that time, they cannot split themselves in half.

The day my mum was told she had terminal cancer and had weeks to live, bearing in mind at her admission to hospital, she thought she had pulled something in her back, when we left for the evening, she had a massive panic attack, the nurses sat with her to calm her breathing and did not leave her until she was calm. If another patient had needed the bathroom they would have had a judgement call to make....its not always that they are uncaring, sometimes they need to prioritise.

We were there visiting just under an hour and that patient hadn't asked in all that time, until the instance I highlighted.

Furthermore, even had they offered a bedpan would have been more acceptable.

Livia was right.
Literally people are left lying in wet beds, which ends up being even more time consuming for staff to deal with.
Then they likely moan at said patient.

Would you like to think your Parent got treated like that in hospital.

[Marsh.]

Originally Posted by AnnieK

I agree its unacceptable but the nurses could have been dispensing time critical meds, assisting other patients, the lady who said she needed the toilet could say that every 5 minutes....nurses are stretched to the limits due to budget cuts, there could have been.more pressing things.on the ward at that time, they cannot split themselves in half.

The day my mum was told she had terminal cancer and had weeks to live, bearing in mind at her admission to hospital, she thought she had pulled something in her back, when we left for the evening, she had a massive panic attack, the nurses sat with her to calm her breathing and did not leave her until she was calm. If another patient had needed the bathroom they would have had a judgement call to make....its not always that they are uncaring, sometimes they need to prioritise.

Yeah. This.

It's terrible, but not necessarily the staff themselves at fault. There should be more of them, but that's not on them.

[Ammi]

...misgendering ...(..in the context of this story and we can’t ever tell on the accuracy of media stories..)...is something which awareness should be being raised...it is something which is of extreme importance to the person going through their transformation...I do believe an apology was probably appropriate and that apology was made...and in giving that apology...?...it hasn’t stretched further the NHS service as it is at the moment...which is already very stretched with everyone or most people doing their very best...it isn’t a one thing or another situation for me though....an apology is completely in the control of a person/organisation to do...so when it’s required it should be done...other issues within the NHS and its struggles as mentioned in the thread are a lot more difficult to tackle...but yeah, I don’t see why one thing has any bearing on another....

[Amy Jade]

The nurse was wrong for responding the way she did to be fair but is it really worth complaining about?

[Livia]

Considering the terrible things that have happened to LGBT community in the past, I think if someone, accidentally or on purpose, misgenders them, it doesn't really warrant this whole hysterical backlash over someone's momentarily hurt feelings..

[Ammi]

....for many things change only happens though when awareness is raised...when concerns are raised and issues are raised...that’s not hysterical, there’s nothing hysterical about this case so far as I can see...she wrote to the hospital administration which was completely appropriate...I mean I just can’t see that ‘blokes in frocks’ can and will be moved on from in trans awareness because this is not dress up stuff..yeah I do understand in some situations it may not always be easier to tell the difference...?....but that’s surely why it’s important that these things do become highlighted...

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by Ammi

....for many things change only happens though when awareness is raised...when concerns are raised and issues are raised...that’s not hysterical, there’s nothing hysterical about this case so far as I can see...she wrote to the hospital administration which was completely appropriate...I mean I just can’t see that ‘blokes in frocks’ can and will be moved on from in trans awareness because this is not dress up stuff..yeah I do understand in some situations it may not always be easier to tell the difference...?....but that’s surely why it’s important that these things do become highlighted...

Sure, yet anytime women raise concerns around trans issues, specifically self Iding, that's exactly what we're called. Shouldn't it work both ways?

[user104658]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

Sure, yet anytime women raise concerns around trans issues, specifically self Iding, that's exactly what we're called. Shouldn't it work both ways?

Only if it's hysterical?

"This is a sensitive issue on all sides that needs careful consideration before making new policies than may affect women"... fair and not hysterical.

"Blokes are dressing up as women to assault them and there are going to be sexual attacks right, left and centre!!!" ... needless and hysterical.

[Ammi]

Originally Posted by Toy Soldier

Only if it's hysterical?

"This is a sensitive issue on all sides that needs careful consideration before making new policies than may affect women"... fair and not hysterical.

"Blokes are dressing up as women to assault them and there are going to be sexual attacks right, left and centre!!!" ... needless and hysterical.

...raising potential concerns before any incident or issue... ‘prevent’..is also not hysterical though...only hysterical is hysterical...as in uncontrolled and unreasonable and negatively emotional etc..l

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by Toy Soldier

Only if it's hysterical?

"This is a sensitive issue on all sides that needs careful consideration before making new policies than may affect women"... fair and not hysterical.

"Blokes are dressing up as women to assault them and there are going to be sexual attacks right, left and centre!!!" ... needless and hysterical.

Anytime a story bringing anything about trans issues is posted here it's called a smear campaign, anytime any concerns are raised it's hysteria or just transphobia .

In regards to your first example, the "reasonable one", unfortunately nobody seems to be consulted at all before policies (such as allowing transwomen in womens sports) are put through, so alot of times it's too late for lets discuss this first

[Ammi]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

Sure, yet anytime women raise concerns around trans issues, specifically self Iding, that's exactly what we're called. Shouldn't it work both ways?

...yeah of course it should be a balanced field...I’m not sure which women have been called hysterical and for what reason....but when I find out, there’ll be trouble to pay.....

[Ammi]

...or not..

[Livia]

Originally Posted by Ammi

....for many things change only happens though when awareness is raised...when concerns are raised and issues are raised...that’s not hysterical, there’s nothing hysterical about this case so far as I can see...she wrote to the hospital administration which was completely appropriate...I mean I just can’t see that ‘blokes in frocks’ can and will be moved on from in trans awareness because this is not dress up stuff..yeah I do understand in some situations it may not always be easier to tell the difference...?....but that’s surely why it’s important that these things do become highlighted...

She was wearing an Ann Summers Mrs Santa outfit.

When I worked for an MP, we had countless cases come to surgery, families who were appalled by the neglect of their loved ones in hospitals, almost always elderly people who were left hungry, dehydrated, covered in bedsores, suffering unexplained injuries injuries. Because the families had got themselves Power of Attorney for finance, but not for medical care, there was little they could do. Social services couldn't provide a care place, nor would they allow the person home, so they were kept in the geriatric ward and treated like scum. I never ever saw a letter of apology from a hospital.