[Shaun]

Kosovo... go go go Kosovo...

It's time to go go go
To Kosovo...
Off to Kosovo
I go!
I know!
It snows!
With hoes!

You'll never knowwwwww
Until you goooo
Tooo Kosovo

I wont take no
from yo'
We're going to the show

The highs
The lows

When you gooooooOOooooOooo
To Kosovoooooooooo

Ko
so
vo!




hai/

[GypsyGoth]

[Maia]

........

[Tom4784]

[Maia]

Masterpiece

[Shaun]

We've embarked on the first Hungarian space program after reading that Kosovan...Kosovish...Koskoskoskosk... monstrosity. Earth is no longer satisfactory to us.

Quite, Georg. Whilst we escape your pathetic planet, try not to slit your throats over the next song from Sweden (Shaun)!

[Niamh.]

That was fantastic Greg

Marc................eh............super

[Maia]

Was just so funny how I said they always deliver and then they come out with that

[Shaun]

"Swede Dream", Shuyoncé

Youtube video

[During the intro, Shuyoncé is revealed on-stage accompanied by two male and two female dancers. Wearing a gold sequined leotard (as seen in the image at the bottom), she performs gentle thrusts to the beat.]
Every night I rush to my bed
With hopes that maybe I'll get to fuck a Swede guy when I close my eyes
I'm improving giving head
Spanking my rabbit tail,
Tie up my hands, take me for a ride?
Mouths open, tongues cover your flies
And I hope it rains
You're the perfect slutty guy,
[A dancer runs up to her with a vial of pale white fluid]
What kind of cream is this?

You can be a Swede dream or a Norwegian nightmare
Either way I, don't wanna wake up from you
[She slams herself inbetween the two male dancers provocatively.]
Swede dream or a Norwegian nightmare
Somebody pinch me, your cum's too good to be true
[She licks Dancer #1's bare chest before squatting and thrusting at the camera.]
My filthy vulva it ain't goin nowhere
Baby, long as you're here
I'll be gasping for air cause
[She stops thrusting and joins the female dancers for some choreography. It's really good, I can assure you.]
You can be a Swede dream or a Norwegian nightmare
Either way I, just wanna make out with you
[She suddenly snogs one of the girls, prompting several of the front row audience members to gasp, drop their glasses of vodka and, in the case of one young girl, cry.]


[She lunges forward, making a claw.]
I pounce on you when I reach the stairs,
I wrap you around all of my thighs
[She shakes her hair around madly.]
Boy, you're my man, don't you be shy
I wish that when I wake up you're there
To wrap your arms around me for real and tell me you're almost inside
[She runs a hand down the front of her leotard and stops, teasingly, at her mid-riff.]
Tongues filled with lust approach your flies
And I hope it drains
You're so perfect I could die
What kind of dream is this?

You can be a Swede dream or a Norwegian nightmare
Either way, ow, slow down, I'm gonna chafe from you
Swede dream or a Norwegian nightmare
[She squeezes her legs together, apparently suffering some form of irritation.]
Somebody stop me, you've turned my pussy to goo,
Followed your treasure trail, only found more hair
Babe, like a wig from Cher,
[She makes scissor symbols with her hands.]
I'll be trimming down there cause
You can be a Swede dream or a Norwegian nightmare
Either way I, am gonna sort out those pubes

[The stage goes dark and the screen is projected with an image of Noomi Rapace. Shuyonce stares, unblinking, into the camera for the entire bridge and occasionally snarls.]
(THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON!)
Tattoo your jizz across my heart
So it will remain....
Not even sweat can make us part
What kind of cheese is this?

You can be a Swede dream or a Norwegian nightmare
Either way I, need to rinse my vag in some shampoo
Swede dream or a Norwegian nightmare
Somebody scrub me, your love's infected me too
[She expresses an intense feeling of pain.]
My guilty pleasure I think you caused a tear
Baby, crabs in my hair
[She begins ascending the stairs at the back of the stage with some discomfort.]
A real H-I-V scare, cause
You can be a Swede dream or a Norwegian nightmare
[She turns around at the top of the stairs, turns around and wags her fingers at the screen of Noomi Rapace.]
Either way I, got the herpes from you

[Atop the stairway, now, she punches the air before shouting:]
Turn the lights out!

[Z]

[GypsyGoth]

[Kate!]

I've actually looked forward to this all day, and so far its had me in hysterics. Well done guys.

[Z]

Shaun omg

[Tom4784]

That was amazing, the pictures <3

[Niamh.]

Shaun you dirty bastard

[Maia]

LOL omg Shaun

[Shaun]

That was quite fierce, but not as fierce as Kathy Burke dressed as a nun. Hello everyone

Our next act is German (Nathan) and apparently that's okay now so let's hurry up before we accidentally make a Nazi joke. Say heilo to Doctor Joseph Gayballs and a very special guest!

[Shaun]

Dr. Joseph Gayballs ft. Michael21 - Is my tea ready yet?




In a far away kingdom, unbeknownst to man, a goose called Joseph lived on a pond in Zambia, accompanied by michael21, an avid clarinet enthusiast. Known for their awards in the music industry and services to jazz rock, they were approached to represent Germany, the place of Joseph's mother's birth.

*The sound of the clarinet engulfs the packed arena, chants of ''Gayballs! Gayballs! Gayballs!'' fills the air the heavenly sound of Dr Joseph Gayballs flows through the air*






Quack quack quack quack quack


Is my tea ready yet is my tea ready yet?
I've got clarinet practise tonight is my tea ready yet?
Is my tea ready yet is my tea ready yet?
I've got clarinet practise tonight is my tea ready yet?

hello, my name Joseph, I am goose
If you ask me to quack for you I will refuse
Here my friend michael21, he is man
He is my number 1 fan

We watch videe together all night long
We friends that why we make this song
You no like this song I will cry
You no like this song Mr Gayballs will die

Is my tea ready yet is my tea ready yet?
I've got clarinet practise tonight is my tea ready yet?
Is my tea ready yet is my tea ready yet?
I've got clarinet practise tonight is my tea ready yet?

Oh michael21 don't touch me there
Goose-man relationships are frowned upon aren't you aware?
There are many nice ladies out there that for you you see
So please michael21, get your hands off thee

Is my tea ready yet is my tea ready yet?
I've got clarinet practise tonight is my tea ready yet?
Is my tea ready yet is my tea ready yet?
I've got clarinet practise tonight is my tea ready yet?

Quack quack quack quack quack
Microwaveable badger popcorn
Oatcakes and coleslaw
Table salt and pony chowder
Quack



Quack.

[Shaun]

-genuinely crying-

[Z]

Wat.

[GypsyGoth]

[Niamh.]

OMG that was actually amazing. Michael21...............

[Tom4784]

*is in a state of deep confusion*

[Shaun]

Hi, we're Ninastar's groupies. We're backstage drinking with Alaniso Morrisseti and Oiks Aloud! But enough of our nipslips (ohay Eurovision 2009 reference), let's go and see what Finland (GypsyGoth) have come up with this time around!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Maia]

Nathan oh my god