[Kate!]

What do you do?

Do you persevere because the good person is surely still within them?

Or do you move on, after exhausting yourself trying to find redemption with them?

It's a situation I've experienced how bout you?

[Ammi]

…(…I think…)…there is no specific thing, we make our own call on such things…in my own personal experience…people don’t generally change as such, not in any bigger/significant ways, anyway…it’s more that our own perspective of them might change and there are various reasons why that could be…it’s just about making a personal choice of whether to go forward and continue a friendship or not…that’s only for you to say….

[Kate!]

Originally Posted by Ammi

…(…I think…)…there is no specific thing, we make our own call on such things…in my own personal experience…people don’t generally change as such, not in any bigger/significant ways, anyway…it’s more that our own perspective of them might change and there are various reasons why that could be…it’s just about making a personal choice of whether to go forward and continue a friendship or not…that’s only for you to say….

Not always Ammi. I've seen someone go from fun loving, lovable etc etc to extremely nasty in a short space of time. It's very sad and disillusionment. Any friendship is long gone.

[Mystic Mock]

It depends on what the person has done tbh.

[Glenn.]

No ones personality changes that drastically. There’s a lot a lot of factors that determine someone’s change in attitude towards people. I agree with Ammi on this.

[Kate!]

Originally Posted by Glenn.

No ones personality changes that drastically. There’s a lot a lot of factors that determine someone’s change in attitude towards people. I agree with Ammi on this.

It certainly does. It may not be common but it happens. I've experienced it twice in my lifetime. I can see what you mean about factors and influence yes, but sometimes it's pure and simple nastiness that develops which is a real shame. They go from hero to zero. And it's very hard to find any redeeming features once they've been bit by the nasty bug.

Best to have as little as possible to do with them anymore. It's too stressful and demoralising to deal with.

[Glenn.]

Originally Posted by Kate!

It certainly does. It may not be common but it happens. I've experienced it twice in my lifetime. I can see what you mean about factors and influence yes, but sometimes it's pure and simple nastiness that develops which is a real shame. They go from hero to zero. And it's very hard to find any redeeming features once they've been bit by the nasty bug.

Best to have as little as possible to do with them anymore. It's too stressful and demoralising to deal with.

You have to ask yourself what has changed to change the attitude. Like Annie said, people’s tolerance levels change. If someone treats you looks **** or talks to you like **** it’s probable that that persons attitude towards you will be negative which is completely justified.
A friendship is a two way street.

[Kate!]

Originally Posted by Glenn.

You have to ask yourself what has changed to change the attitude. Like Annie said, people’s tolerance levels change. If someone treats you looks **** or talks to you like **** it’s probable that that persons attitude towards you will be negative which is completely justified.
A friendship is a two way street.

I've plenty decent friends who've never changed towards me. Ever. And I'm 55. I think 2 bad apples in a lifetime doesn't reflect upon me. It really isn't a common occurrence. If it were so then I would look at myself. I invest a lot in friendships. Sometimes you have to walk away and come to terms with the fact there's.nothing left and it's not you, it's them.

[Glenn.]

Originally Posted by Kate!

I've plenty decent friends who've never changed towards me. Ever. And I'm 55. I think 2 bad apples in a lifetime doesn't reflect upon me. It really isn't a common occurrence. If it were so then I would look at myself. I invest a lot in friendships. Sometimes you have to walk away and come to terms with the fact there's.nothing left and it's not you, it's them.

I’m sure you have lots of friends and family around you.
I’m sure the two people who have changed their mind on you don’t pay you much mind. Probably best to take your own advice and move on.

[Cherie]

[QUOTE=Kate!;11625393]It certainly does. It may not be common but it happens. I've experienced it twice in my lifetime. I can see what you mean about factors and influence yes, but sometimes it's pure and simple nastiness that develops which is a real shame. They go from hero to zero. And it's very hard to find any redeeming features once they've been bit by the nasty bug.

Best to have as little as possible to do with them anymore. It's too stressful and demoralising to deal with.[/QUOTE]

Think you have answered your own question there Kate

[Ray.]

I leave them to it.

[AnnieK]

I find it easier to just move on to be honest. People's lives change and sometimes their opinions, likes/dislikes change too. Some people's tolerance levels change as they get older too.

It takes far less energy to just move on and let people get on with it than to dwelling and try and fight for something that isn't there anymore.

There is that saying, You have friends for a reason, friends for a season, and friends for a lifetime. I believe that's true too

[Livia]

People rarely change for nothing. Usually there's some kind of catalyst that makes them rethink their relationship with another person.

[Mitchell]

I relate to this a lot, there’s someone I used to be friends with (technically still am, but I’ve not met them in a long time) who went from a really compassionate person to the complete opposite, and I’m still clinging onto hope that they come out the other side, but I’m keeping a bit of a wide berth for now, which is a big shame really