[kirklancaster]

Originally Posted by XmasTurtle

See I go with the other coin. People do change, but more because they learn new things and their needs and wants grow/alter over the years. The initial core of them is still there that you knew and liked, but when new situations arise people adapt themselves (not always consciously) to it.

I look back at myself and I know I have changed, I used to be quite shy, reserved and generally a nice person who was a bit of a doormat, over the years from people taking advantage of that I have become a lot more blunt, closed down and to be honest a bit of a royal ****. The core of me is still in there.


Over time also you do "outgrow" some friends and they "outgrow" you, not in a bad way, but you just become different people with different needs, wants and perspectives. That is why you will have only have a handful of very good friends in life that will be there at all times, those are the ones you want to look after even if they are going through a phase of being a person you do not like (it's your job as their friend to try and reign them back in or at least make them aware of what they are doing/being like).

I agree.

We are all - to an extent - the product of what life makes us. I too have changed because of being taken advantage of throughout my life.

I have always had a (too) giving nature and was always ruled by my heart rather than my head. I always helped anyone, and I used to be 'oh so passionate' about causes - especially 'lost' ones - and had a tendency to fight for the 'underdog'.

Well, now I believe in the adage that; "No good turn ever went unpunished".

Because 99% of people I have helped turned out to be turds, and most of the 'good deeds' I have ever done came back to haunt and actually hurt me.

With one notable exception, no money which I have ever lent to 'friends' (some quite substantial amounts) have ever been 'voluntarily' repaid. Nothing I have ever lent to 'friends' in need who asked to borrow them - from new books, DVD collections, tools, even a very expensive drill - have ever been 'voluntarily' returned.

People do change as they grow older - and not always for the best - and we all 're-invent' ourselves or become 'other' types with different outlooks and attitudes at different stages of our lives.

This sadly, includes some - but thankfully, not all - 'friends'.