[user104658]

I love socialising when I'm socialising but I also find it draining and need to hide away to recharge. At Uni, a couple of times I told everyone in my halls I was going home for the weekend, got in a stash of food that didn't need refrigerating or cooking, and hid in my room in the dark with the curtains drawn watching DVD box sets . Like bloody Gollum in his cave...

[Redway]

Originally Posted by Soldier Boy

I love socialising when I'm socialising but I also find it draining and need to hide away to recharge. At Uni, a couple of times I told everyone in my halls I was going home for the weekend, got in a stash of food that didn't need refrigerating or cooking, and hid in my room in the dark with the curtains drawn watching DVD box sets . Like bloody Gollum in his cave...

I know how it feels when it comes to needing that space in flat/house-shares but seldom having a free kitchen (happens in uni, happens beyond). I didn’t mind it so much to begin with but at one point I’d do most of my cooking at night or quiet Friday evenings/Saturdays when they’d either be asleep or out. We got on fairly well (although it soured in those last few days, mostly because they’d just pissed me off so much by that point) and I was the ghost cleaner who’d leave snacks on the table more Fridays than not (when I could afford to) but I wasn’t too interested in actively socialising or making friends with them. So I’d just stay in my room or eat out if the kitchen was jam-packed with them and their mates and I wasn’t up for kitchen small talk, and sometimes you’re not. You might have a high-energy job or demanding course (or both) that leaves you with depleted desire to be more socially on than necessary to people who you’re not that close to, no matter how nice and helpful you are. When it’s like that you tend to want your peace and quiet and a freer space to cook, but when the kitchen’s getting hogged for hours and hours that can be difficult. Doesn’t mean you won’t ever want to do things with them ever (whether that’s pizza/movie night and a spliff, a good day/night out, study sesh, a meal trade-off, whatever) but it does mean you value your space more than they do.

[Redway]

Anyway, listen, here we are: https://youtu.be/o1Y4Z0oh1GE?si=SVVi9of9GmdnSlT2 https://youtu.be/5CXFO--p590?si=qOq7Cd1jGzJx-5Kp

Introversion and extroversion have tons of definitions (from stuff like this to full-blown Jungian stuff) but on this level it’s just about kicking in with those natural preferences of yours and realising that there’s nothing wrong with being a little more if one than the other. Those videos might help if you feel a little worried that you’re not quite where you want to be social presence-wise. So by all means tap in if it helps.