[Kyle]

Originally Posted by x-evenstar-x

Maybe a baby isn't all she wants, she might want other things first and a baby is the furthest thing from her mind. Maybe this is a conversation you should have with her to find out exactly how she feels.

Alright sorry.

[x-evenstar-x]

Originally Posted by ChristMASS EFFECT

Alright sorry.

It's fine,I guess it's interesting to hear everyone's opinion.

[james130]

Yeah, I know; without a doubt, that I want kids and a family.
If the woman I was with didn't share that aspiration, then I would find another; no matter how much I loved her. I doubt I would enjoy my life and would live with regret if I did not have kids and (sad but true) would grow to resent my partner for it.

[thesheriff443]

a spanner from me in the works,
you split with someone over wanting kids, then find out you cant have kids.

[Cherie]

Originally Posted by Ammi

..I don't think you can 'deprive' someone of being a parent, I think really the decision is up to them whether they want the relationship with that person more or to be a parent more...

True enough as long as you are not hiding the fact that you don't want kids or giving her the impression that you might change your mind in the future when you know in your heart that you won't then it is her choice.

My sisters husband never wanted kids, she would have liked some but she wanted to be with him more, they have a great relationship and I don't think she ever regretted it.

[Ammi]

Originally Posted by Cherie

True enough as long as you are not hiding the fact that you don't want kids or giving her the impression that you might change your mind in the future when you know in your heart that you won't then it is her choice.

My sisters husband never wanted kids, she would have liked some but she wanted to be with him more, they have a great relationship and I don't think she ever regretted it.

..yeah, I think that’s it, Cherie..not everyone wants children anyway, but even if one of the people in the partnership does and the other doesn’t, it can still be a great/long lasting relationship and isn’t necessarily ‘doomed to fail’...what we want/our directions etc change through our lives anyway and couples can start going in different directions/not want the same things at any point in time and any point in their relationship... it’s just that with children there is an association that females will want to become mothers but that isn’t always the case, some prefer not to be... but even if the female does want a child, maybe that would change for her if the having of that child meant a ‘sacrifice’ of the person she loved and wanted to be with, that can put a whole new spin on it....

...I don’t think there is anything that my OH could have said that would have made me feel, uh uh, I can’t be with you then if that’s how you feel because my feelings for the guy I knew and loved was a much stronger emotion than any need or want for a child that I had yet to know and love at the time, you only love them (children) when you have them/become pregnant etc .... anyway, it’s lovely that your sister and her husband are happy and so much in love with each other, that’s always nice to hear.... and yeah, openness and honesty...always....

[AnnieK]

I have always known I wanted children and when we split I didn't know if I could but i knew that i had to keep trying....I loved my OH enough to let him go rather than get pregnant and make him resent me for making him do something he didn't want to do but I could not envisage my life without having a child (or doing all I could to get there)