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Old 20-07-2009, 07:49 PM #1
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Default Chuck Norris
Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever the **** he wants.
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Old 20-07-2009, 07:51 PM #2
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Quote:
Originally posted by lili
Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever the **** he wants.
Lmao

Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.
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Old 20-07-2009, 07:51 PM #3
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The moon is actually a comet that was once on course to hit earth... then Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked it into orbit.
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Old 20-07-2009, 07:51 PM #4
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Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
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Old 20-07-2009, 07:52 PM #5
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Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
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Old 20-07-2009, 07:52 PM #6
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I hate Chuck Norris.
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Old 20-07-2009, 07:54 PM #7
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If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.
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Old 20-07-2009, 07:56 PM #8
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The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked one of the corners off.
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Old 20-07-2009, 08:07 PM #9
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Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
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Old 20-07-2009, 08:15 PM #10
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When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
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Old 20-07-2009, 08:17 PM #11
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Chuck Norris can put humpty dumpty back together again.
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Old 20-07-2009, 10:19 PM #12
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Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
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Old 20-07-2009, 10:20 PM #13
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Chuck Norris can slam revolving doors.
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Old 20-07-2009, 10:27 PM #14
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Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.
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Old 20-07-2009, 10:50 PM #15
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When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.
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Old 20-07-2009, 10:52 PM #16
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Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.
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Old 20-07-2009, 10:53 PM #17
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Before Chuck Norris was born, the martial arts weapons with two pieces of wood connected by a chain were called NunBarrys. No one ever did find out what happened to Barry.
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Old 20-07-2009, 10:54 PM #18
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Chuck Norris is the only person that can punch a cyclops between the eye.
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Old 20-07-2009, 10:54 PM #19
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LOL
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Old 20-07-2009, 10:56 PM #20
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a miracle in order to split the ocean. He just walks in and the water gets the **** out of the way.
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Old 20-07-2009, 11:09 PM #21
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Jesus can walk on water. Chuck Norris can swim on land
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Old 20-07-2009, 11:10 PM #22
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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at burger king and got it.
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Old 21-07-2009, 08:48 AM #23
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Best.
Thread.
Ever.




On a high school math test, Chuck Norris put down "Violence" as every one of the answers. He got an A+ on the test because Chuck Norris solves all his problems with Violence.
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Old 21-07-2009, 08:49 AM #24
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If it looks like chicken, tastes like chicken, and feels like chicken but Chuck Norris says its beef, then it's ****ing beef.
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Old 21-07-2009, 08:55 AM #25
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Chuck Norris knows where Carmen Sandiego is.
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