[Shasown]

A good few years ago, when I was lets say not as worldly wise, after a good night out i was chatting to a young lady(I use the term very loosely) anyways it turns out she lived quite close to my mothers house, so we walked home together, thats about all I can remember, the next morning I awoke with a young lady beside me , not realising where I was I decided to do something about the morning wood, - good times, unfortunately a few minutes into the dirty deed we were disturbed by my very strict Irish Catholic mother sticking her head round the door to see if I wanted a cuppa.

I have at various times woken up in storm drains, monsoon ditches, industrial tumble driers, various cars, a department store, someone's office,a swimming pool, a yank millionaires yacht, farmers fields, barns, hayricks, garden sheds, other peoples houses rooms beds and wives. All through alcohol fuelled nights.

However the most embarassing wake ups have to be laid beside arm chewers, you wake up and the dragon lady beside you is asleep and lying on your arm, in order to not wake her up and escape her place you start to chew through your own arm. You manage to extricate yourself without too big a scene but as always happens, a mate saw you leave the pub/nighclub with her.