[Pyramid*]

Story in the DM today.

How the lady on the right is still alive, beggars belief - both are bad, but she looks worse (if that's even a consideration) than her sister on the left.

Sad, heartbreaking and disturbing all at the same time. Both of these ladies are doctors.





http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/ar...maginable.html

[CharlieO]

I honestly don't see why people starve themselves to be that thin. It's not even attractive in any way.
Say someone overweight starved themselves to be of normal weight. I can understand that I don't think it's right but can understand it. But to be perfectly normal and want to be a skeleton basically is horrible. And people like that can't blame the media, no model or actress would be hired that skinny it's just horrible, they must have body dismorphia.

[Novo]

How can anyone live like that you would be ashamed to go out in public imagine being out in a strong wind surely you would get blown of balance being that skinny..

[Pyramid*]

Originally Posted by CharlieO

I honestly don't see why people starve themselves to be that thin. It's not even attractive in any way.
Say someone overweight starved themselves to be of normal weight. I can understand that I don't think it's right but can understand it. But to be perfectly normal and want to be a skeleton basically is horrible. And people like that can't blame the media, no model or actress would be hired that skinny it's just horrible, they must have body dismorphia.

It's psychological Charlie, that's the problem - there's a degree of body dysmorphia in that the anorexic 'sees' a very distorted vision of what they look like - in comparison to how they actually look. There's the issue of 'control' as well (ie; they can feel it's the one thing in life that they actually have control over).

Very hard illlness for all concerned and those around them.

[lostalex]

i think illness can be beautiful. Much more attractive than arrogant self-absorbed ignorant Jordan types.

I find the guys i'm attracted to are often very flawed and very insecure. like me.

[joeysteele]

Originally Posted by Pyramid*

It's psychological Charlie, that's the problem - there's a degree of body dysmorphia in that the anorexic 'sees' a very distorted vision of what they look like - in comparison to how they actually look. There's the issue of 'control' as well (ie; they can feel it's the one thing in life that they actually have control over).

Very hard illlness for all concerned and those around them.

Great post Pyramid, it's like a funfair crazy mirrors syndrome type of thing,they look in a mirror and somehow in their mind they imagine they are overweight,so that's what they see no matter what the reflection shows.

It is so sad,very scary too,even for the people around them who care it must be near soul destroying to see happen.

[Claymores]

I unfortunately had an ex (many years ago) who was slim but started to eat less + go to gym - you didn't need a psychology degree to see she was dying with mental health issue of weight.

I walked away from this relationship - hope she's well now and 14 stone and 3 kids.

[lostalex]

body dysmorphia is not like a fun house mirror. it's more that you focus on a specific part of your body as a guage, instead of seeing yourself objectively. For instance, a jewish person might focus on their nose, and be obsessed about their nose being too big, because of stereotypes, or a black person might focus on the colour of their skin, and focus only on how dark they are, or a woman might focus on her breasts and how big they are, because society creates stereotypes for us all, and in some cases, with body dysmorphia, we focus on one part of the body, one aspect, above all other aspects.

Anorexics know they are too skinny, but they often focus on one part of the body that they don't like and try to fix it, just like dark girls will over use skin bleach, or jewish girls would obsess over a nose job.

It's not as simple as saying it's like a carnival mirror, it's nothing like a carnival mirror.

It's more like a magnifying glass.

[GypsyGoth]

[Vicky.]

That looks awful. And anyone who takes advice from either of them as doctors...also needs help :/

[Livia]

I find it interesting how someone who is anorexic gets so much more sympathy than someone who is obese. In many cases they are similar in their psychosis, in that both have a freaked-out relationship with food and suffer from life-threatening mental illness. The anorexic though, is tiny, pixie like and more socially acceptable than someone who is obese. Obese people are fair game it seems for anyone who wants to have a pop at them and they are ridiculed mercilessly by society. People's heart bleeds for the tiny anorexic, while assuming the obese person is just greedy and lazy. Surely both are mentally ill and deserve understanding and treatment?

[Vicky.]

Originally Posted by Livia

I find it interesting how someone who is anorexic gets so much more sympathy than someone who is obese. In many cases they are similar in their psychosis, in that both have a freaked-out relationship with food and suffer from life-threatening mental illness. The anorexic though, is tiny, pixie like and more socially acceptable than someone who is obese. Obese people are fair game it seems for anyone who wants to have a pop at them and they are ridiculed mercilessly by society. People's heart bleeds for the tiny anorexic, while assuming the obese person is just greedy and lazy. Surely both are mentally ill and deserve understanding and treatment?

Definitely agree with all of this

[Claymores]

Originally Posted by Livia

I find it interesting how someone who is anorexic gets so much more sympathy than someone who is obese. In many cases they are similar in their psychosis, in that both have a freaked-out relationship with food and suffer from life-threatening mental illness. The anorexic though, is tiny, pixie like and more socially acceptable than someone who is obese. Obese people are fair game it seems for anyone who wants to have a pop at them and they are ridiculed mercilessly by society. People's heart bleeds for the tiny anorexic, while assuming the obese person is just greedy and lazy. Surely both are mentally ill and deserve understanding and treatment?

It does occur to me that obesity can be a long-term lifestyle choice in many cases, whereas starving yourself to death is a form of body dysmorphia which requires sympathy and intervention for the mental illness. It implies conscious angst rather than a love of food and fun over years. The two are incomparable and to mention the two extremes in the same breath is silly.

Nobody is going to stop the fatty having the chocolate pudding + enjoying themself at the dinner table while he/she engages with everyone..........I believe it is less torrible if another is not eating, having food issues and/or 'doing a Diana' down the toilet pan in mental anguish.

[Boothy]

Originally Posted by Claymores

It does occur to me that obesity can be a long-term lifestyle choice in many cases, whereas starving yourself to death is a form of body dysmorphia which requires sympathy and intervention for the mental illness. It implies conscious angst rather than a love of food and fun over years. The two are incomparable and to mention the two extremes in the same breath is silly.

Nobody is going to stop the fatty having the chocolate pudding + enjoying themself at the dinner table while he/she engages with everyone..........I believe it is less torrible if another is not eating, having food issues and/or 'doing a Diana' down the toilet pan in mental anguish.

I'd agree with this.

[Mystic Mock]

I think im going to be sick.

[Mystic Mock]

Originally Posted by Claymores

It does occur to me that obesity can be a long-term lifestyle choice in many cases, whereas starving yourself to death is a form of body dysmorphia which requires sympathy and intervention for the mental illness. It implies conscious angst rather than a love of food and fun over years. The two are incomparable and to mention the two extremes in the same breath is silly.

Nobody is going to stop the fatty having the chocolate pudding + enjoying themself at the dinner table while he/she engages with everyone..........I believe it is less torrible if another is not eating, having food issues and/or 'doing a Diana' down the toilet pan in mental anguish.

As long as there not to big I dont see why they should be made a fool out of.

[joeysteele]

Firstly bad example I used in that using a funfair mirror syndrome, I had a cousin who was heading towards this awful condition and she said if she looked in a mirror all she could see was someone very overweight,she used the funfair mirror thing it was not on my part a poor attempt to joke about the situation.
However the bulk of anorexics do not actually know they are too skinny,many don't even believe its a problem that may in time greatly harm them or be fatal for them.

Anyway,Pyramid summed it all up far better than myself, thankfully my Cousin got help and was sorted and is fine now.

I agree with jedward fever that no one should be made fun of whether way too thin or too obese. I would go further to say even those who we see on TV documentaries who are massively obese don't warrant being made fun of.

The picture posted at the start of this thread is a very sad one, these people need understanding and limitless support to help them identify their problem and seek help before its too late.

[Claymores]

cool JF + joey - I just feel that to pidgenhole sufferers of this mental illness with people who are overwight is wrong. I took exception to Livia's idea

[Vicky.]

However pidgeonholing all overweight people as just people who are just greedy and do not need help or have an illness is fine...

[Ammi]

I knew someone with anorexia years ago. She was a beautiful girl with a fantastic figure. Her parents had high expectations of her and she didn't have the same plans for her future that they did and felt as though she was being pushed into a direction she didn't want to go. When she stopped eating, for her, It wasn't about how she looked, it was about taking some control in her life. She said if she could use such self control in not eating the things that gave her pleasure, she felt more powerful and in control. She didn't think about or blocked out what her body started to look like because she wanted to keep that control. In fact she always avoided even looking in the mirror. She was ok in the end but it was after many years and a very supportive partner. Her parents however couldn't help because the more they tried to encourage her to eat, the more she felt they were trying to take away her control so she resisted more.

[Ammi]

I knew someone with anorexia years ago. She was a beautiful girl with a fantastic figure. Her parents had high expectations of her and she didn't have the same plans for her future that they did and felt as though she was being pushed into a direction she didn't want to go. When she stopped eating, for her, It wasn't about how she looked, it was about taking some control in her life. She said if she could use such self control in not eating the things that gave her pleasure, she felt more powerful and in control. She didn't think about or blocked out what her body started to look like because she wanted to keep that control. In fact she always avoided even looking in the mirror. She was ok in the end but it was after many years and a very supportive partner. Her parents however couldn't help because the more they tried to encourage her to eat, the more she felt they were trying to take away her control so she resisted more.

[Vicky.]

Originally Posted by rhino

I knew someone with anorexia years ago. She was a beautiful girl with a fantastic figure. Her parents had high expectations of her and she didn't have the same plans for her future that they did and felt as though she was being pushed into a direction she didn't want to go. When she stopped eating, for her, It wasn't about how she looked, it was about taking some control in her life. She said if she could use such self control in not eating the things that gave her pleasure, she felt more powerful and in control. She didn't think about or blocked out what her body started to look like because she wanted to keep that control. In fact she always avoided even looking in the mirror. She was ok in the end but it was after many years and a very supportive partner. Her parents however couldn't help because the more they tried to encourage her to eat, the more she felt they were trying to take away her control so she resisted more.

Yeah this seems quite common tbh. People assume its all about how they look, when its not in all cases.

[Pyramid*]

Originally Posted by lostalex

Much more attractive than arrogant self-absorbed ignorant Jordan types.

Now lostalex, that really is no way to refer to a fellow forum member: that's not nice. Oh wait.....that wasn't quite what you meant was it!!. (sorry, had to be done)

Originally Posted by lostalex

body dysmorphia is not like a fun house mirror. it's more that you focus on a specific part of your body as a guage, instead of seeing yourself objectively. For instance, a jewish person might focus on their nose, and be obsessed about their nose being too big, because of stereotypes, or a black person might focus on the colour of their skin, and focus only on how dark they are, or a woman might focus on her breasts and how big they are, because society creates stereotypes for us all, and in some cases, with body dysmorphia, we focus on one part of the body, one aspect, above all other aspects.

Anorexics know they are too skinny, but they often focus on one part of the body that they don't like and try to fix it, just like dark girls will over use skin bleach, or jewish girls would obsess over a nose job.

It's not as simple as saying it's like a carnival mirror, it's nothing like a carnival mirror.

It's more like a magnifying glass.

I'll beg to differ on the BIB. Anorexics don't often focus on one part of their body. There is a huge part of the illness that surround the issue on 'control' - as well as anorexic person seeing a very distorted vision/reflection of their body when they look in a mirror. What THEY see, is simply NOT how they are. In that sense: it is exactly as Joeysteele described - the distortion of image viewed by the anorexic person - compared to the real image of the anorexic person as seen by others.

Originally Posted by Livia

I find it interesting how someone who is anorexic gets so much more sympathy than someone who is obese. In many cases they are similar in their psychosis, in that both have a freaked-out relationship with food and suffer from life-threatening mental illness. The anorexic though, is tiny, pixie like and more socially acceptable than someone who is obese. Obese people are fair game it seems for anyone who wants to have a pop at them and they are ridiculed mercilessly by society. People's heart bleeds for the tiny anorexic, while assuming the obese person is just greedy and lazy. Surely both are mentally ill and deserve understanding and treatment?

Originally Posted by Claymores

It does occur to me that obesity can be a long-term lifestyle choice in many cases, whereas starving yourself to death is a form of body dysmorphia which requires sympathy and intervention for the mental illness. It implies conscious angst rather than a love of food and fun over years. The two are incomparable and to mention the two extremes in the same breath is silly.

Nobody is going to stop the fatty having the chocolate pudding + enjoying themself at the dinner table while he/she engages with everyone..........I believe it is less torrible if another is not eating, having food issues and/or 'doing a Diana' down the toilet pan in mental anguish.

I have to disagree with Litvia I'm afraid, and agree with Claymores: partly for the reasons Clays gave: but also, from the obese person's point of view: it can take many many years to get to such obesity without any immediate damage. The anorexic on the other hand, this can take hold and be a real threat to lasting damage to organs, and threat to life - in a far quicker period of time- in comparison to the 'average' obese/ morbidly obese person - who can take many years to reach the size they are before real lasting damage (or the probability of death) becomes a real threat.

That (I think) is one of the main reasons there is a very different 'sympathetic' view given to anorexics that doesn't apply to those obese.

These twins are not the best example of what I am trying to explain: we have read all sorts of stories about young teenagers suffering from organ failure and dying through anorexia - the death rate for obese teenagers simply doesn't come close. That's the diffference: Anorexia can be fatal, very quickly.

Originally Posted by joeysteele

Firstly bad example I used in that using a funfair mirror syndrome, I had a cousin who was heading towards this awful condition and she said if she looked in a mirror all she could see was someone very overweight,she used the funfair mirror thing it was not on my part a poor attempt to joke about the situation.
However the bulk of anorexics do not actually know they are too skinny,many don't even believe its a problem that may in time greatly harm them or be fatal for them.

.

I feel that your example of 'funfair mirrors' to highlight the distorted view as seen by anorexics was actually a very simple but highly effective and explanatory example.

Originally Posted by Claymores

cool JF + joey - I just feel that to pidgenhole sufferers of this mental illness with people who are overwight is wrong.

Totally agree ... for the reasons I've mentioned futher up in my post here.

As bad as it is for the anorexic: the feeling of complete and utter helplessness - not to mention frustration - angst, hurt etc for those who love them: that must be one of the most awful things to watch: knowing that you really can't do anything much other than be there, help them as much as they allow / want and be there to support.

[joeysteele]

Thank you very much indeed Pyramid, I was speaking from what I had seen with my Cousin and although cases obviously vary she,having been anorexic would have agreed with my interpetration of her condition at that time.

You however,I do think made the point very effectively and clearly with much greater understanding of it.
It is an awful condition/illness to have and it's crushingly painful too for loved ones to see happening,however at the time,my Cousin wore baggy jumpers etc to appear to have more weight than she actually had so hid it for a good while before the problem was realised.

[Claymores]

Originally Posted by joeysteele

Thank you very much indeed Pyramid, I was speaking from what I had seen with my Cousin and although cases obviously vary she,having been anorexic would have agreed with my interpetration of her condition at that time.

You however,I do think made the point very effectively and clearly with much greater understanding of it.
It is an awful condition/illness to have and it's crushingly painful too for loved ones to see happening,however at the time,my Cousin wore baggy jumpers etc to appear to have more weight than she actually had so hid it for a good while before the problem was realised.

Agreed joey - Pyr put the points across - wishes to yer family