[Z]

Originally Posted by Jack_

His points are fair but his methods are wrong, it's that simple really. You do not humiliate your own daughter at all, let alone in front of the entire world.

But it's okay for her to humiliate her parents on Facebook? And hey, it's not like he hasn't been humiliated either by this going viral - perhaps they've both learned a lot from this experience. He's got people thinking he'll kill his daughter or something and she's got people thinking she's the most spoiled brat in existence.

[Ammi]

...Oh, I see Jack's already posted what I was going to say
Zee, I am not the girl's age, I have children older than the girl myself, so I see it from the young persons viewpoint and from a parents. I think he has very valid points, I don't think that can be argued with. But he didn't just take the computer away from her, did he. I think he would be justified to do that. For me, he has invalidated his reasoning by his actions. Sometimes we may feel so p*ssed off and frustrated by someone's ingratitude that we feel like getting down to their level in our actions...we mat feel like it and people wouldn't necessarily blame us...but it doesn't make it right. Two wrongs never make a right.
I do think he's probably a good parent though...but that was a display of bad parenting though

[Ammi]

Originally Posted by Zee

But it's okay for her to humiliate her parents on Facebook? And hey, it's not like he hasn't been humiliated either by this going viral - perhaps they've both learned a lot from this experience. He's got people thinking he'll kill his daughter or something and she's got people thinking she's the most spoiled brat in existence.

No it's not....but imo he didn't act very maturely either.
...but I agree, I hope they've both learned from this....I think they both acted badly

[Z]

Originally Posted by Ammi

...Oh, I see Jack's already posted what I was going to say
Zee, I am not the girl's age, I have children older than the girl myself, so I see it from the young persons viewpoint and from a parents. I think he has very valid points, I don't think that can be argued with. But he didn't just take the computer away from her, did he. I think he would be justified to do that. For me, he has invalidated his reasoning by his actions. Sometimes we may feel so p*ssed off and frustrated by someone's ingratitude that we feel like getting down to their level in our actions...we mat feel like it and people wouldn't necessarily blame us...but it doesn't make it right. Two wrongs never make a right.
I do think he's probably a good parent though...but that was a display of bad parenting though

But clearly taking it away from her in the past didn't work, because of the rant she posted about him online for all her friends to see. That's why I agree with his actions, more than anything. This is a man who was pushed into taking a more serious stance, it's just that we, the audience online, have only seen him at this stage and so it's quite easy to assume he must be like that all the time.

[Kizzy]

only in the land of the yee haws...haha no offence Americans but if that happened here ther would be Social Services, an armed response, local and national news, several MPs and one of the loose women round within 5 minutes.

[Ammi]

Originally Posted by Zee

But clearly taking it away from her in the past didn't work, because of the rant she posted about him online for all her friends to see. That's why I agree with his actions, more than anything. This is a man who was pushed into taking a more serious stance, it's just that we, the audience online, have only seen him at this stage and so it's quite easy to assume he must be like that all the time.

...but that's the whole point....we've only been given a small part of the picture, so I'm not assuming anything. From the father's point of view (and we haven't been given a balance to that), I would agree with and understand the points he is making in terms of what they provide from her and what is expected in return. I would like to know how the 'previous incident' he referred to was dealt with. I'd like to know whether it was one strike then I'll bow the s*it out of your laptop or whether she has continually and consistantly disrespected her parents and everything they do for her...I'm not assuming anything, there's so much we don't know. What we do know, from his information only, is that it appears a punishment was required...I do not feel that punishment was in anyway mature or showed to me a parent who had firm control of a situation. Apart from anything else, he paid for it with his hard earned dollars......not the brightest thing to do imo

[Jack_]

Originally Posted by Lee.

When I was a kid, cheek or insolence resulted in a slapped arse. Humiliating, but I have ended up a respectful being who is endlessly thankful for how my mum brought me up.

And when I was a kid I wasn't (well, maybe a couple of times), and I certainly haven't ever had my laptop blown apart by a gun. And I've turned out fine...

Originally Posted by Zee

But it's okay for her to humiliate her parents on Facebook? And hey, it's not like he hasn't been humiliated either by this going viral - perhaps they've both learned a lot from this experience. He's got people thinking he'll kill his daughter or something and she's got people thinking she's the most spoiled brat in existence.

She hardly humiliated him, she's entitled to her opinion. Her dad, you and most people are forgetting that most teenagers vent their frustration at their parents to their friends and online on sites like Facebook and Twitter, I don't know about you but I see it all the time. It's all part of growing up...it's puberty, you get annoyed and frustrated at the tiniest of things. You trick yourself into believing that your parents are the worst, most annoying people in the world. But they're not, and deep down you know they're not...and one day you realise how stupid you were for getting so annoyed, but during that time you can't help it. It happens. People go through it and parents should just let it pass, I hardly doubt she means it, she's just got a bit annoyed and stressed with her life that's all. Yeah, she might not have it that hard...but to her she does, and she doesn't understand the difference. That doesn't make it right for her dad to embarrass her in front of the world and take a gun to her laptop.

There are plenty of other avenues in which he could have ventured down to get his problem across. Perhaps if he'd sat her down and explained to her in great detail his upset, then she might have got he message. I know from experience that when my mum used to get upset at how I behaved during puberty, I felt really bad and changed my ways. It's a learning curve. But if my parents had humiliated me in such a way, and done that to my laptop...I'd have never spoken to them again.

[Ammi]

Originally Posted by Jack_

And when I was a kid I wasn't (well, maybe a couple of times), and I certainly haven't ever had my laptop blown apart by a gun. And I've turned out fine...



She hardly humiliated him, she's entitled to her opinion. Her dad, you and most people are forgetting that most teenagers vent their frustration at their parents to their friends and online on sites like Facebook and Twitter, I don't know about you but I see it all the time. It's all part of growing up...it's puberty, you get annoyed and frustrated at the tiniest of things. You trick yourself into believing that your parents are the worst, most annoying people in the world. But they're not, and deep down you know they're not...and one day you realise how stupid you were for getting so annoyed, but during that time you can't help it. It happens. People go through it and parents should just let it pass, I hardly doubt she means it, she's just got a bit annoyed and stressed with her life that's all. Yeah, she might not have it that hard...but to her she does, and she doesn't understand the difference. That doesn't make it right for her dad to embarrass her in front of the world and take a gun to her laptop.

There are plenty of other avenues in which he could have ventured down to get his problem across. Perhaps if he'd sat her down and explained to her in great detail his upset, then she might have got he message. I know from experience that when my mum used to get upset at how I behaved during puberty, I felt really bad and changed my ways. It's a learning curve. But if my parents had humiliated me in such a way, and done that to my laptop...I'd have never spoken to them again.

I don't agree parents should let bad or selfish behaviour 'pass' Jack...Under reacting would be as bad as over reacting imo. It's a parents responsibility, I think, to have a conversation with their kids if they observe any selfish or bad behaviour and point out how it effects others and if that doesn't work and the behaviour persists...other punishments...withdrawing privelages would be condsidered...I just think this particular act and the public way in which he did it were extreme and all he proved to me was that he can get fairly p*ssed off too....what does that tell me....like father like daughter perhaps

[Z]

Originally Posted by Jack_

She hardly humiliated him, she's entitled to her opinion. Her dad, you and most people are forgetting that most teenagers vent their frustration at their parents to their friends and online on sites like Facebook and Twitter, I don't know about you but I see it all the time. It's all part of growing up...it's puberty, you get annoyed and frustrated at the tiniest of things. You trick yourself into believing that your parents are the worst, most annoying people in the world. But they're not, and deep down you know they're not...and one day you realise how stupid you were for getting so annoyed, but during that time you can't help it. It happens. People go through it and parents should just let it pass, I hardly doubt she means it, she's just got a bit annoyed and stressed with her life that's all. Yeah, she might not have it that hard...but to her she does, and she doesn't understand the difference. That doesn't make it right for her dad to embarrass her in front of the world and take a gun to her laptop.

There are plenty of other avenues in which he could have ventured down to get his problem across. Perhaps if he'd sat her down and explained to her in great detail his upset, then she might have got he message. I know from experience that when my mum used to get upset at how I behaved during puberty, I felt really bad and changed my ways. It's a learning curve. But if my parents had humiliated me in such a way, and done that to my laptop...I'd have never spoken to them again.

She hardly humiliated him? What? She bitched him out over Facebook to all of her friends. She tried to prevent him from seeing it by blocking him from reading her updates - so clearly she knew what she was doing wasn't smart or clever, but she wanted to post it online for some kind of applause from her friends. Not most teenagers, some teenagers, and that's only nowadays. Our parents didn't have the internet. They knew better than to advertise their bad mouthing in places where their parents could find out about it. And that one day of realising you were stupid, for this girl, was the day she found out about what her dad had done and when things escalated to the point of social services getting involved. How's that for consequences? I would put money on her never doing anything like this again, it'll make her grow up and change her attitude towards her parents. Isn't that precisely what her father wanted? That's a brilliant outcome if you ask me. But clearly sitting her down and talking to her hasn't worked, you don't go and shoot up a laptop if you haven't already tried talking sense to the girl, I refuse to believe that he wasn't pushed into doing something drastic. You'd have never spoken to your parents again for breaking your laptop? Doesn't that say a lot about how we place so much importance on material goods? A laptop is a piece of technology that we have as a luxury, families are what make us who we are. If you'd rather value a laptop over your family, then clearly you'll never see the point of this father's message.

Can we also bear in mind the fact he mentions that the mother of the girl agrees with him, she asked him to put a bullet in the laptop too? I'd have thought the views of two people would somewhat reinforce the fact that the daughter's pushed them to the limit.

[arista]

Originally Posted by Ammi

No it's not....but imo he didn't act very maturely either.
...but I agree, I hope they've both learned from this....I think they both acted badly

Enough to get on all US TV News
for sure

[Jack_]

Originally Posted by Ammi

I don't agree parents should let bad or selfish behaviour 'pass' Jack...Under reacting would be as bad as over reacting imo. It's a parents responsibility, I think, to have a conversation with their kids if they observe any selfish or bad behaviour and point out how it effects others and if that doesn't work and the behaviour persists...other punishments...withdrawing privelages would be condsidered...I just think this particular act and the public way in which he did it were extreme and all he proved to me was that he can get fairly p*ssed off too....what does that tell me....like father like daughter perhaps

I guess so, and I suppose what I said there contradicts what I said at the end of my post.

However, is it really selfish? I don't know. She does the chores...she just got stressed and expressed her frustration about it online, as most young people do. We all had to do things we didn't want to when younger, and complained about them and got upset over them, but it doesn't mean we actually mean it. Looking back I'm embarrassed about how I acted some times. I'd get annoyed/upset over the most pointless of things, I snapped at my parents over nothing. But it's all part of growing up, my parents didn't like it and occasionally pulled me up on it, but a lot of the time they just let me get on with it because they knew it was just part of puberty. And I've not turned out bad as a result of that. I don't know...it's a difficult one.

His methods of 'discipline' were unacceptable though, that's the bottom line of it. So I agree there.

[Kizzy]

Originally Posted by InOne

I think you should all log off facebook and sort your issues out over a game of scrabble.

anyone fancy a game of scrabble?

[Jack_]

Originally Posted by Zee

She hardly humiliated him? What? She bitched him out over Facebook to all of her friends. She tried to prevent him from seeing it by blocking him from reading her updates - so clearly she knew what she was doing wasn't smart or clever, but she wanted to post it online for some kind of applause from her friends. Not most teenagers, some teenagers, and that's only nowadays. Our parents didn't have the internet. They knew better than to advertise their bad mouthing in places where their parents could find out about it. And that one day of realising you were stupid, for this girl, was the day she found out about what her dad had done and when things escalated to the point of social services getting involved. How's that for consequences? I would put money on her never doing anything like this again, it'll make her grow up and change her attitude towards her parents. Isn't that precisely what her father wanted? That's a brilliant outcome if you ask me. But clearly sitting her down and talking to her hasn't worked, you don't go and shoot up a laptop if you haven't already tried talking sense to the girl, I refuse to believe that he wasn't pushed into doing something drastic. You'd have never spoken to your parents again for breaking your laptop? Doesn't that say a lot about how we place so much importance on material goods? A laptop is a piece of technology that we have as a luxury, families are what make us who we are. If you'd rather value a laptop over your family, then clearly you'll never see the point of this father's message.

Can we also bear in mind the fact he mentions that the mother of the girl agrees with him, she asked him to put a bullet in the laptop too? I'd have thought the views of two people would somewhat reinforce the fact that the daughter's pushed them to the limit.

But teenagers do that, it doesn't mean they mean what they say...their hormones are all over the place (not to mention she's a girl...periods), they'll get angry over the tiniest of things. My younger brothers have reached that stage now and they get frustrated over such small things that me or my parents do, but I just accept it because I went through that stage once, and know how it felt, and know how I didn't mean anything I said. I don't think it's humiliation at all myself, and, the fact that he went out of his way to try and find out what she'd been 'hiding' is just creepy if you ask me. That's like trying to read your children's diary or texts, just on a different medium. Why would you do that?

Clearly though they weren't trying hard enough. Just because they haven't got through to her once, or twice, it doesn't mean that they can embarrass her in front of the world. I made a point earlier in this thread about how such actions could severely affect someone's self-esteem, and it's true...it's unacceptable, especially from her own parents. There's plenty of traditional methods that have worked for years when you keep trying, but going out of your way to embarrass your own daughter is just disgusting, whether it's to a few people, or in this case...the whole world.

And no, maybe that part of my post was a bit confusing. The laptop...I'd be a bit upset about. But the fact that I had been publicly humiliated on such an extraordinarily large scale would be my biggest problem. Millions of people around the world judging me, abusing me and laughing at me. That's awful, I can't even begin to comprehend how I'd feel, it'd be like the entire world was against you. Some people may be fine with that, others wouldn't, and I'm one of that. I would never forgive them. Parents are the only people in the world that you should be able to trust not to do things like this, and to have them do it...that's just awful.

[Ammi]

Originally Posted by Zee

She hardly humiliated him? What? She bitched him out over Facebook to all of her friends. She tried to prevent him from seeing it by blocking him from reading her updates - so clearly she knew what she was doing wasn't smart or clever, but she wanted to post it online for some kind of applause from her friends. Not most teenagers, some teenagers, and that's only nowadays. Our parents didn't have the internet. They knew better than to advertise their bad mouthing in places where their parents could find out about it. And that one day of realising you were stupid, for this girl, was the day she found out about what her dad had done and when things escalated to the point of social services getting involved. How's that for consequences? I would put money on her never doing anything like this again, it'll make her grow up and change her attitude towards her parents. Isn't that precisely what her father wanted? That's a brilliant outcome if you ask me. But clearly sitting her down and talking to her hasn't worked, you don't go and shoot up a laptop if you haven't already tried talking sense to the girl, I refuse to believe that he wasn't pushed into doing something drastic. You'd have never spoken to your parents again for breaking your laptop? Doesn't that say a lot about how we place so much importance on material goods? A laptop is a piece of technology that we have as a luxury, families are what make us who we are. If you'd rather value a laptop over your family, then clearly you'll never see the point of this father's message.

Can we also bear in mind the fact he mentions that the mother of the girl agrees with him, she asked him to put a bullet in the laptop too? I'd have thought the views of two people would somewhat reinforce the fact that the daughter's pushed them to the limit.

Even if I accept that his daughters behaviour was so extreme that drastic measures were called for (and I'm not assuming anything as all I've seen is this few minute video and one persons viewpoint). I would certainly say the 'lesson' to teach her would involve depriving her of the lapto,p as it is appropriate with the fact that she used the laptop to 'attack' her parents but I will never feel that destroying an expensive possession and giving her a smug 'commentary' while doing it is either mature or intelligent. As I've said, all it shows me is they can both get p*ssed off with stuff...and if a parent is trying to teach a child that getting p*ssed off and posting disrespectful stuff isn't clever....it's a fairly screwed way to do it imo

[Jords]

Ammi

[Visage]

I'll never understand why a lot of parents seem to get off on humiliating their children as a form of discipline, and then wonder why they turn out to be messed up adults. This should have been handled privately and in a less extreme manner.

Instead, the father chose to publicly humiliate his daughter and is getting tons of praise in the process. Obviously the daughter was being disrespectful, but how does he expect her to become mature and respectful when his style of parenting is to act like some gangster?

While I'll never pretend to know the answers on parenting, I can only go on how I was raised and how I have brought my daughter up.


I also think Kids today are more disrespectful BECAUSE of the parents, not because they're inherently rotten. Who bought the kid her iPod, laptop, cell phone, etc? Not her apparently. And by not reinforcing that to live in a materialistic society you have to actually earn things, they created their own monster who rants on facebook.

[Jords]

Originally Posted by Jack_

But teenagers do that, it doesn't mean they mean what they say...their hormones are all over the place (not to mention she's a girl...periods), they'll get angry over the tiniest of things. My younger brothers have reached that stage now and they get frustrated over such small things that me or my parents do, but I just accept it because I went through that stage once, and know how it felt, and know how I didn't mean anything I said. I don't think it's humiliation at all myself, and, the fact that he went out of his way to try and find out what she'd been 'hiding' is just creepy if you ask me. That's like trying to read your children's diary or texts, just on a different medium. Why would you do that?

Clearly though they weren't trying hard enough. Just because they haven't got through to her once, or twice, it doesn't mean that they can embarrass her in front of the world. I made a point earlier in this thread about how such actions could severely affect someone's self-esteem, and it's true...it's unacceptable, especially from her own parents. There's plenty of traditional methods that have worked for years when you keep trying, but going out of your way to embarrass your own daughter is just disgusting, whether it's to a few people, or in this case...the whole world.

And no, maybe that part of my post was a bit confusing. The laptop...I'd be a bit upset about. But the fact that I had been publicly humiliated on such an extraordinarily large scale would be my biggest problem. Millions of people around the world judging me, abusing me and laughing at me. That's awful, I can't even begin to comprehend how I'd feel, it'd be like the entire world was against you. Some people may be fine with that, others wouldn't, and I'm one of that. I would never forgive them. Parents are the only people in the world that you should be able to trust not to do things like this, and to have them do it...that's just awful.

Spot on Jack.

I think a few members feel all grown up now theyre no longer teens and are no longer willing to understand. I mean Im not a great moaner, and people like the girl would probably piss me off tbh. However I can relate to the tiredness and even though yeah shed get on my nerves and I disagree with how she voiced her opinion that doesnt make what her dad did automatically right. I can see where shes coming from to a degree and imo what he did was a lot uncalled for and contradicting.

And if parents got humilated everytime their children moaned and bitched about them no parent would ever show their face
Parents will not give a damn what school friends think of them, and if they do theyre certainly not very mature.

[Marc]

I agree with this guys frustrations. I had chores when I was a kid and I might have thought they were harsh when I was younger but now looking back on them, they were nothing!! Hardly any effort at all.

Well played to this guy for doing what he's done. She sounds like a spoilt brat who's parents have just had enough.

[Ammi]

Originally Posted by Visage

I'll never understand why a lot of parents seem to get off on humiliating their children as a form of discipline, and then wonder why they turn out to be messed up adults. This should have been handled privately and in a less extreme manner.

Instead, the father chose to publicly humiliate his daughter and is getting tons of praise in the process. Obviously the daughter was being disrespectful, but how does he expect her to become mature and respectful when his style of parenting is to act like some gangster?

While I'll never pretend to know the answers on parenting, I can only go on how I was raised and how I have brought my daughter up.


I also think Kids today are more disrespectful BECAUSE of the parents, not because they're inherently rotten. Who bought the kid her iPod, laptop, cell phone, etc? Not her apparently. And by not reinforcing that to live in a materialistic society you have to actually earn things, they created their own monster who rants on facebook.

That is a very appropriate point...to shower your children with every current technology and then be appalled by their lack of gratitude does not make sense at all to me.

[Jords]

Originally Posted by Marc

I agree with this guys frustrations. I had chores when I was a kid and I might have thought they were harsh when I was younger but now looking back on them, they were nothing!! Hardly any effort at all.

Well played to this guy for doing what he's done. She sounds like a spoilt brat who's parents have just had enough.

She will most likely think this too, looking back.
Just not now.

f/

[Jords]

Originally Posted by Visage

I'll never understand why a lot of parents seem to get off on humiliating their children as a form of discipline, and then wonder why they turn out to be messed up adults. This should have been handled privately and in a less extreme manner.

Instead, the father chose to publicly humiliate his daughter and is getting tons of praise in the process. Obviously the daughter was being disrespectful, but how does he expect her to become mature and respectful when his style of parenting is to act like some gangster?

While I'll never pretend to know the answers on parenting, I can only go on how I was raised and how I have brought my daughter up.


I also think Kids today are more disrespectful BECAUSE of the parents, not because they're inherently rotten. Who bought the kid her iPod, laptop, cell phone, etc? Not her apparently. And by not reinforcing that to live in a materialistic society you have to actually earn things, they created their own monster who rants on facebook.

Very good post Visage.

[Marc]

Who are you f/ing?

She totally disrespected her parents on Facebook and clearly doesn't show any gratitude for the stuff her parents do for her. This girl, Hannah, got what she deserved.

[Ammi]

Originally Posted by Marc

I agree with this guys frustrations. I had chores when I was a kid and I might have thought they were harsh when I was younger but now looking back on them, they were nothing!! Hardly any effort at all.

Well played to this guy for doing what he's done. She sounds like a spoilt brat who's parents have just had enough.

Oh, I totally relate to his frustrations and feeling something had to be done....he could either escalate the whole situation by adding further to the wrong or he could behave like an adult and apply himself to parenting his daughter....whether 'all's ended well' or not...the end does not always justify the means imo

[Harry!]

All I could think was while watching in that video: "Only in America..."

[Ammi]

Originally Posted by Marc

Who are you f/ing?

She totally disrespected her parents on Facebook and clearly doesn't show any gratitude for the stuff her parents do for her. This girl, Hannah, got what she deserved.

..there's two ways to look at it though Marc...they have an ungrateful, disrespectful, lazy daughter....yet they keep showering her with gifts and dad takes time off work to fix her laptop...and they thought that would make her a better person

...he better pace himself if he's going to get through the next 4 teen years...otherwise he'll run out of bullets....maybe he'll grenade her first car
...the car he'll probably buy her....even though she's an ungrateful daughter