[mr rochester]

Originally Posted by Livia

In other spider news... fears are growing tonight for Incy Wincy. He was last seen this morning attempting to climb a water spout but disappeared soon after a heavy shower hampered his progress. An shocked onlooker said, "The rain came down and just washed the spider out". More on this story at ten.

It's ten. We are proud to announce, viewers, that the sun (surprisingly) came out again and Incy Wincy showing great fortitude of mind and body gave it another go. He is now perched on the top of the water spout looking utterly bemused and claims to be awaiting further instructions from Spider H.Q. Unfortunately he appears to have lost his mobile phone and is (allegedly) bereft without it. NATO have been informed and are sending in the troops. We are reliably informed that an air strike is deemed unnecessary at the moment.