[T*]

why is this in SD&N

[arista]

Originally Posted by Tom!

why is this in SD&N

Maybe the mods can not work it out?

[Kyle]

To find a girl's my beck and call
Cos someone burst my blow up doll
My dear Monica rest in tatters
I loved our midnight chitter chatter
I say we talked, only I had words
You weren't like all the other birds
That nag and nag the night away
And make me wish I was born gay
Enough of that cos now your gone
I'll probably have to watch some porn
Until I find a girl I like
I'll get her drink of which I'll.......

....Only joking I'll just be cool
Maybe have a laugh and play some pool
And at the end I'll try to cop off
And then she'll tell me to **** off
So another night, I'm all alone
No blow up doll to soothe my bone

Fin

[kirklancaster]

Paradise Lost (definitely not Milton’s version)

You seek me here, you seek me there
Oh Waterhog you seek me everywhere

Give up this hunt – you must be bent
You stupid Cnt – you’re the reason I went

I lay there each night my charms exposed
Where were you? Composing prose.

In bed I lay naked ten thousand times
Where were you? - Scribbling rhymes.

I’d shout downstairs “I need you”
You’d shout back “I’ll come up later”

But as your fingers switched on the typewriter
Mine switched on my vibrator

They say “There’s only so much a girl can take”
But with me that truth’s untested
‘Cos even though I begged you for some
You were never interested.

I'd lay butt naked, legs akimbo, oil upon my belly
But all you ever dabbled in was Byron, Keats and Shelley

When we wed and I said “I do”, I should have said “I don’t”
Because you said “I do” too, but since then you simply won’t.

So now I’ve gone my darling, at last now I am free
To find a poetry-hating stud to make sweet love to me.

Though I’m not alone on my quest- I just thought you ought to know
I have twin sex slaves at my service – one Dil the other Doe.

So continue with your poetry Waterhog – scribble at your leisure
For your ex is finally now, discovering ways of gaining pleasure.

For example, I make love now on a mirror
(I just thought you should be knowing)
And my orgasms are so incredible
I don’t know whether I’m coming or going.

Anyway my love, ‘tis in vain you’ll search this land
I’ve gone to ground, I won’t be found
So take yourself in hand.