[Nedusa]

Originally Posted by kirklancaster

Dedicated to LIVIA and NINASTAR – two women with balls of steel. An excerpt from:

'ISIS – THE MUSICAL' (With apologies to ‘Chicago’)

INT. THE TIBB LOUNGE. DAY.

LIVIA’, NINASTAR, LOSTALEX and KIRK and JOEYSTEELE are chatting.

NINASTAR(Spoken)
Those ISIS bastards have beheaded another poor victim. I’m feckin sick of it.

LOSTALEX(Spoken)
We gotta get real with these murdering demons, they’re a cancer on humanity. .

LIVIA(Spoken)
We need to eradicate these ISIS bastards once and for all. Bomb them all to oblivion.

JOEYSTEELE (spoken) I agree. It doesn’t matter what it takes, we need to wipe them from the face of the Earth.

KIRK (Spoken)
You’re all absolutely right. This war- this whole murdering terrorist business – It’s easily solved. We’ve just got to stop playing and really mean business with them.

KIRK (Singing)
Give 'em the old frazzle dazzle
Frazzle Dazzle 'em
Give 'em a bomb with lots of flash in it
take off the gloves and let’s be passionate
Give 'em the old plutonium
The only way is to be nuking ‘em.
How can they kill, when they’re vapourised?

What if, your demise is imminent?
Because being PC is fecking impotent??
Then, Frazzle dazzle 'em
Blow ‘em up to the skies.

Give 'em the old Frazzle Dazzle

KIRK, LIVIA, NINASTAR, LOSTALEX & JOEYSTEELE (singing)
Frazzle dazzle 'em
Nuclear bombing is so splendiferous

KIRK
And the free world’s praise will be quite vociferous

KIRK, LIVIA, NINASTAR, LOSTALEX & JOEYSTEELE
Give 'em the old Enola Gay stuff
Let ‘em know we’ve had e-fecking-nough

KIRK
How can they kill when they ‘aint here no more?

KIRK, LIVIA, NINASTAR, LOSTALEX & JOEYSTEELE
ISIS propaganda is all just a finagle
to be swallowed with Sahlav and a warm bagel,

KIRK
Frazzle dazzle 'em
And they'll murder no more!

KIRK, LIVIA, NINASTAR, LOSTALEX & JOEYSTEELE
It gets ya nowhere just despising ‘em
Ya gotta get busy vapourising ‘em
Ever since the days of old Methuselah
Everyone loves the big bangbooz-a-ler

Don’t be arresting, charging and trying ‘em
The only way is nuclear frying ‘em
If ya wanna beat ‘em, then don’t give ‘em a chance

Mercy and Justice, they never heard a
Their only intention is to murder
So, frazzle dazzle 'em
It’s the sensible stance.

LIVIA, NINASTAR, LOSTALEX & JOEYSTEELE(over KIRK)
Give 'em the old
Frazzle Dazzle

KIRK
Give 'em the old Frazzle Dazzle
Frazzle dazzle 'em
Give ‘em all that we’re worth.
It aint rash making ash of all of ‘em
If ya don’t the West will fall for them
So frazzle Dazzle 'em

KIRK, LIVIA, NINASTAR, LOSTALEX & JOEYSTEELE
Frazzle Dazzle 'em
Frazzle Dazzle 'em

Then we’ll have Peace On Earth.

Is this coming to a Theatre near me any time soon ?




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