[Jason.]

Originally Posted by Jason.

I'm saving Justine because she shares the same name as kween Justine Littlewood.

Darnell Swallow

BB9 is one of those series where the people you were rooting for initially end up being just as awful as the people you were rooting against and Darnell is the perfect example to support the above statement. So Darnell started off perfectly fine at first and I didn't really mind him. Well at least, I think I didn't (it's been almost ten years and I'm in desperate need of a BB9 re-watch, which probably won't happen anytime soon.) He was incredibly righteous during Spitgate, which is something you can't say for pretty much everyone else that was involved, so fair play to him for that.

But the main reason why I find Darnell so abhorrent was because he starred in a sex tape with Billi Bhatti. No really, I could just end this write-up now because that pretty much tells you all you need to know about this pond life. His disgusting treatment of Sara, like that time he called her the biggest slut in the house or a gold digger, and a really bad one at that because she's an "ugly bitch" or when he DEMANDED her cook him a meal only to immediately throw it out in front of her. His descent into misogynistic, insecure, self-pitying, sack of shit all because Sara supposedly "led" him on when she touched his forearm playfully that one time or s/t just made the latter half of BB9 sooo ****ing insufferable to watch and it didn't help that we had to put up with him until the ****ing end. WELL NO, NOT THIS TIME. PISS OFF!

.

[Jake.]

290th Place: Daley Ojuederie


I genuinely don't think I can muster up 100+ words on Daley... No, seriously.

I could go over him strangling Hazel and basically cheating on his girlfriend whilst blaming Hazel the second he realised the majority of the trashy viewers would be on his side, but there's Dailymotion if you really wish to relive that.

Instead, I'm going to quickly focus on something that wasn't broadcast on the highlights show (yet shown the night before on livefeed);

So, remember the safe house? It had a phone which BB could use to communicate with housemates as they wished. Well, one particularly eventful evening (the one mentioned above which led to his removal) after Hazel and Daley were voted in by the public to live in the safe house (good move), Hazel was in the garden speaking to whoever (it might have been Charlie idk), when Daley called Hazel into the bedroom:

"Big Brother said you've got to come inside, they're locking the door and closing the shutters"...

Big Brother did no such thing. Idk why it's something which I remember so vividly, but for someone to be that possessive after 20 something days is alarming.



Oh and he cried once.

[Babayaro.]

#FunFact

Daley and Nasty Nick, who were both ejected in week 5, did not receive any nominations during their time in the house.

[Shaun]

flashbacks to me and LemonJam lowkey stanning him all series and being very "no he actually seems very cool!" when deep down we were just dickpigs that jumped ship the second he grabbed ha neck </3

[Jake.]

Tbf I was gonna mention in my write up that I found him fine/maybe even a bit interesting before the nonsense started to take place

[Shaun]

I guess when the rest of the male cast are Dan, Sam, Dexter, Callum and the ****ing twins, you will look anywhere for a decent male

[Rufus]

Seeing Kayleigh, Darnell and Mikey being above the likes of Hannah, Deborah, Gina, Mark and Jayne makes me feel sick.

[Macie Lightfoot]

285. Gerry Stergiopoulos (BB8 - 9th Place)



sdufaopsdfjs;laf eugh Gerry is someone who I don't think has any redeeming qualities and is unquestionably one of the most annoying people of all time! His whole shtick was about being A Worldly And Intelligent Gay except he wasn't either of those things, but that didn't stop him from being pooooossibly the most smug and condescending HM ever? Like, he always insisted on his own intelligence bc he liked to go to museums and he has three degrees? And thought PAULINE was intelligent bc she came from Australia but knew that it was summer in England and then he just looked down his nose at people he didn't deem to be intelligent even though Nicky is definitely more intelligent and Charley definitely has more social smarts despite being insanely argumentative and off-putting Gerry was also a suuuuper frustrated self-victimizer who would constantly put on wounded productions like "*massive sigh* I WAS NOMINATED FOR BEING MYSELF" and "well Amy you're nominated and you just have to put it behind you!!!" even though someone like Gerry Lastname is physically incapable of putting ANYTHING behind him.

Oddly enough, and this is definitely a minor point but it bugged me a LOT, the Thing that actually pushed Gerry past Ziggy as my least favorite of BB8 was how ****ing creepy he was with Sam and Amanda? He infantilized them and fetishized them and it was not only patronizing but creepy as hell. Remember that whole fight he had with Ziggy because Ziggy kicked a ball over the wall and Gerry FLIPPED OUT bc the ball was a globe and he used it to teach the twins geography, and it's not about the ball but about MANNERS??????? Like imagine how bad you have to be in an argument to make me side with Ziggy and Liam.

And then sadly Gerry's eviction wasn't even a satisfying one because of the whole ~guru twist~ which just resulted on Gerry falling on his sword, volunteering to be evicted, and then parading himself in his interview as A Good Person and that's enough about Gerry GOODBYE

[Jamie89]

Aw John James, for the record if I'd have been a ranker I'd have given him my pass to the final Such an underrated housemate.

Originally Posted by Babayaro.

John James. Brilliant housemate

[Shaun]

Just waiting on the Cameron write up and I'll post jake's nominations this evening

[Daniel.]

The Gerry writeup

[Shaun]

Ahem miss reece!

[Black Dagger]

Originally Posted by Jamie89

Aw John James, for the record if I'd have been a ranker I'd have given him my pass to the final Such an underrated housemate.

Well thankfully you arent. He is a POS.

[Shaun]

Hmm... I'll allow this to continue on the proviso that reece does both writeups before round 5. If she doesn't she shall be replaced! You'll have plenty of time because I'm back on sunday and won't be writing a bio for whoever I eliminate on my phone

Jake's nominations were made this morning. And they are...




Aden (BB12) - Alison (BB3) - Charlie (BB10) - David (BB8) - Emma (BB5) - Jonathan (BB7) - Jonty (BB8) - Kimberly (BB15) - Laura (BB11)
Louise (BB12) - Narinder (BB2) - Saffia (BB10) - Sam (BB17) - Saskia (BB6) - Shievonne (BB13) - Spiral (BB7) - Sylvia (BB9) - Tania (BB4)

Everyone... get saving and eliminating... NOW! Y'all have 12 hours to make your decisions, otherwise someone else can step in.

[Shaun]

Saved Tania because there are FAR worse BB4 HMs that need axing before her shame on you Jake

283. Shievonne Robinson (BB13)


I've eliminated Shievonne because there are few housemates that I can recall who have gone into the house with such a determination and desperation to reel off a list of catchphrases. Shievonne was - for all intents and purposes - relatively volatile and ready to argue with anyone, and didn't really pick sides too much in what was one of the more obviously-divided series, but at the same time, I remember her with such a 2D finish that it's disappointing. Towards the end of her stay she tried it with Deana, Adam, Lydia and Lauren - ie. the series' best four - and she rightly became hated for never letting anything go. I think she's seriously underrated in how much of a ****ing terrible bitch she was.

She had a challenge to overcome a str8whitemale in a head to head eviction but given that it was Conor and that he beat her with around 80% of the vote (IIRC), you can't help but write Shievonne off as a failure. If you wake up and smell the hummus, that is.

[Jason.]

I save Saskia because hers are real.

Glen 'Spiral' Coroner

The trend of having a revolving door of housemates that would soon become standard in the later C4 years first started in BB7 and it gave us Spiral, as a result, who ****ing sucked. He was an aggressive bitch who would throw his toys out of the pram whenever things didn't go his way, for example, that time he randomly flipped out at Nikki just because Aisleyne refused to snog him during a game of spin the bottle. I mean I didn't really care for Nikki all that much in her BB7 stint, but you know you're in the wrong when you make me sympathise with a lunatic that cries whenever the room is too cold.

Spiral is mostly remembered for his weird relationship obsession with Aisleyne where he'd make these cringy raps like how she has an ass like a loaf of bread or how he'd do...everyting to her. But it did give us this underrated gem of a moment, where he one time told her that she was disrespecting herself for dressing too provocatively and she just stared him down and was like "...are you sure? are you sure about that statement, babes. Because I don't think you are." However, the main turning point was during the Prison Task where he just raged at Aisleyne for reasons I don't remember because it's Spiral and it's been like...what, 3 years since I re-watched BB7 but he truly was a bellend and he rightfully got evicted like a day later alongside the equally irrelevant and annoying Michael. He continued to be an even bigger prick outside the house, like when he was on Big Mouth with all the other evictees during the return twist and his campaign was something like "vote me back in so I can drag Aisleyne out of the house" while lapping up the anti-Aisleyne crowd, as if he'd be sat there if Aisleyne didn't save him over Jonathan in the first place, the tramp.

Oh and I didn't know where to mention this, but I really wanted to, and it's more of a Susie thing, but her obvious disdain for Spiral, where she'd look down on him just like the rest of us (ugh, relatable queen) was sf hilarious. <333

[Jason.]

Ugh I really wanted to save Narinder but I realised I'm like the only person that can appreciate Saskia so I had to save her because she doesn't deserve Lucas' foul-mouthed rant! (well not yet anyway and certainly not before Maxwell)

[Black Dagger]

Axe Emma and save Allison x

[Macie Lightfoot]

save Jonty cut Kimberly xx

[Babayaro.]

Save Jonathan cut Charlie

[Daniel.]

Save Sylvia Cut Charlie (I would have saved Saskia Jason)

[Daniel.]

Emma going before Jason is gross

[Jake.]

jesus can sam giffen be GONE

[Cal.]

Wait shaun i used my final pass on emma prior to this

[Cal.]

STOP THIS NOW help