[Daniel-X]

Beryl Cheryl Meryl Streep Fernandez-Versini is the supermarkets go to girl. Beryl grew up with forty brothers so it's no wonder she's a dyke and loves carpet. She also had a sister but Beryl killed her because she wanted to be the only dyke in the famalam. Beryl used to be dating former colleague Pavlo Cheesynachos in an attempt to fleece him of £5 but he found out about her plan and dumped ha leading ha to having a breakdown.

Doreen is old and everyone tells her. People are waiting for her to die so they can get their hands on her money. Everyone is trying to seduce her to get into her will. Doreen is a coffin dodger like no other and everyone prays together in the staff room that hopefully she will die.

Elroy Williams is a fierce man eating slut. Elroy used to go by the name Ellie but had a sex change because he kept getting pregnant. Elroy then found God and now is a bible basher. He and fellow bible basher Danielle McMahon are best friends and they both should 'Stop shagging Jesus!' Elroy is secretly LaDaysha's mum.

Jale Burrito has lead a fairly normal life. She's been in two car crashes, been married seven times, had thirteen children, been in a fire, been shot and been in the big brother house where she gained thirty pounds and went by the name Karaturp.

Maureen is everyone's favourite pin up girl. A former playboy bunny Maureen retired from this job at seventy six after she broke her hip during sexual intercourse. She is the fun loving and sexier sister of Doreen. Maureen's high sex drive has lead to five prison sentences.

Kathy/Deb is Norah Lickmeout's old flame but their passion never died. Kathy has recently changed her name to Deb in the store and chopped off all her hair after the ghost of Adjoa Mensah who she resurrected threatened to put a deadly curse in her if she didn't lick Adjoa's pussay. Kathy stayed faithful to Norah and said 'There's only one woman for me' so had to change her name before Adjoa tracked her down and cursed ha.

Do you remember Linda? No? Do you remember Tyra Banks? Yes! Well Linda is Tyra's fat sister who made nothing of her life and ended up looking like a fat mess. Tyra sends a dollar bill to Linda every Christmas.

[Crimson Dynamo]

Originally Posted by Will1999

terrible weather outside the supermarket today

and windy. I noticed that Abdul was having a problem with some of the trolleys blowing to the west side of the car park. One nearly hit a Ford Focus and the driver told Abdul to "******* off back to where ever you came from" which would be Leicester in the case of Trolley Assistant Abdul.

I told Abdul to get the reg number and report it to Mrs Cumberbatch in HR








Fanny Cumberbatch has been Head of HR for 2 years and is a Lesbian seductress and a local Hockey player.

[Daniel-X]

Fanny adding some diversity slé sis

[Will.]

Queen Fanny, Can we have a longer bio LeatherTrumpet and I'll ad her in!

DANIEL THE BIOS ARE AMAZING

POOR DOREEN!

[Will.]

New Customer adviser Pov has joined the store...

[Crimson Dynamo]

Fanny Wanger Axewound Cumberbatch is 32 and has been employed for 2 years at the top of the HR pile.

Born in Singapore to a mother who was a common street prostitute and a father who was in and out of jail for reckless rape of animals she has fought and climbed her way to the top. With little formal schooling she left home at 16 and hitchhiked across Europe to settle in England where she started as a shelf stacker in Netto.

A voracious lesbian from an early age Fanny has scissored her way around the North of England and her hockey prowess has come in handy when dealing with the occasional angry bull dyke who she has cheated on. (not that there is anythiung wrong with bulldykes)

A gifted Flautist she has performed at Chorley Town Hall and does private lessons for anyone who wishes to improve their performances on the skin flute.

Fanny has a phobia of spiders and rice and musically is really into White Power groups like Angry Aryans', Brainwash, Chaos 88 and Youth of tomorrow. She describes herself as a mild racist and supports Manchester Citeh.

She has a tattoo of Jamelia on her inner thigh with a scroll with the words "no pussy will be spared" in chinese writing.

For the future Fanny hopes that one day all eastern Europeans in the UK will be repatriated and that history will look kinder on the achievements of the 3rd Reich and "not just endlessly focus on the bad stuff"

She weights 8 stone and is 5 foot six. her breasts have been enhanced at considerable cost.

[Crimson Dynamo]

merge will merge

[Will.]

Originally Posted by LeatherTrumpet

merge will merge

Yours is better, I'm using yours.

[Daniel-X]

Maybe Fanny can have a sissy called Kelly Rowland who works at the supermarket?

[Will.]

she could

[Crimson Dynamo]

I hope Chaos will take to Fanny?

[Will.]

Fanny iconic

[Will.]

BREAKING: POV has died after tripping outside on his way into the store.

[Crimson Dynamo]

Originally Posted by Will1999

BREAKING: POV has died after tripping outside on his way into the store.

Its not Abduls fault

Someone better page fanny pronto

[Daniel-X]

Norah and Kathy marry in cereal aisle

Today the public of Britain wondered why they were getting a bank holiday. It was because of the Royal wedding of Norah and Kathy. After being engaged for three days the couple finally tied the knot in the cereal aisle and are now happily married and enjoying their honeymoon in Butlins. Norah and Kathy decided to have their venue at the supermarket as Will walked Norah down the aisle to her favourite song 'We are the cheeky girls'

Fanny was the ring bearer but somehow managed to get two hula hoop crisps stuck up their vaginas. The couple enjoyed a ceremony later in the staff room. The meal consisted of pickled onion monster munch for starters, tesco value chicken korma for their main and Kathy's homemade fishy fanny trifle for desert.

The couple also revealed to OK that they are expecting their first child! May the newly wed couple lead a new happily married life.

[Jason.]

What is this thread actually supposed to be?

[Will.]

Originally Posted by BB6

What is this thread actually supposed to be?

My supermarket

[Will.]

Originally Posted by Daniel-X

Norah and Kathy marry in cereal aisle

Today the public of Britain wondered why they were getting a bank holiday. It was because of the Royal wedding of Norah and Kathy. After being engaged for three days the couple finally tied the knot in the cereal aisle and are now happily married and enjoying their honeymoon in Butlins. Norah and Kathy decided to have their venue at the supermarket as Will walked Norah down the aisle to her favourite song 'We are the cheeky girls'

Fanny was the ring bearer but somehow managed to get two hula hoop crisps stuck up their vaginas. The couple enjoyed a ceremony later in the staff room. The meal consisted of pickled onion monster munch for starters, tesco value chicken korma for their main and Kathy's homemade fishy fanny trifle for desert.

The couple also revealed to OK that they are expecting their first child! May the newly wed couple lead a new happily married life.

Iconic wedding

[Crimson Dynamo]

Monster Munch

what a romantic addition

[Will.]

Youtube video

[Crimson Dynamo]

[Will.]

Norah and Kathy are having a lovely time at Butlins.

[Daniel-X]

I can't believe they tied the knot love them both so much

[Will.]

Norah and Kathy

[Morgan.]

I love Wills Supermarket.