[Livia]

I only slept with Leather Trumpet because he said he worked in Hedge Funds. Turns out he doesn't even have a hedge. B*stard...

[user104658]

Originally Posted by Livia

I only slept with Leather Trumpet because he said he worked in Hedge Funds. Turns out he doesn't even have a hedge. B*stard...

He did, but he cut it down so that he could get a better view at the ladies sunbathing in the next door garden.

[smudgie]

Originally Posted by Livia

I only slept with Leather Trumpet because he said he worked in Hedge Funds. Turns out he doesn't even have a hedge. B*stard...

Trumpets Strumpet

[Livia]

Working on the lawsuit even as we speak...

[user104658]

Kirk told me that he was Nigel Farage but he had actually just put on an old spitting image mask. I wanted to be close to the power, but all I got were broken dreams and a broken coccyx.

[Livia]

A woman cannot be convicted of rape in the UK unless she has a penis. She can be convicted of accessory to rape, or she can be convicted of sexual assault.