[optimisticcynic]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

You're right no one should raise a hand to anyone absolutely but I think it seems worse when it's a man against a woman because of the obvious physical differences, that's biological and never going to be equal, men, generally speaking are alot stronger than women and a woman would find it very difficult to defend herself against a man who was attacking her

Some women are bigger than men. Is it ok for a short man to ht a tall woman? I think the sentiment behind the notion is exactly the one that people complain is misogynistic. If I made an announcement that women shouldn't be in the army as they would be disadvantaged in hand-to-hand combat, I would rightly be set-upon. If people are going to live by their holier-than-thou diatribe, they shouldn't be selective. People shouldn't abuse people, but I refuse to accept that I have less right to be vocal obstinate and invasive of another's personal space than a woman (Luisa) due to the fact that I am male. Dappy's tiny anyway, but stature clearly wasn't the consderation when he was lambasted. Even Luisa mocked him for being a "little man rying to be a gangster".

[Kyle]

Originally Posted by Kazanne

I would think he's been dealt with by the law,so who am I to keep judging him?Why is he not allowed to try and right his mistakes?

Maybe so but we are judged as people by our deeds in life. In my eyes there is no excuse for what he did to that and that is why I don't like him.

Originally Posted by Kazanne

I'll be honest here,I had a couple of fights with an ex boyfriend years ago and in that situation you just don't think,I had a shiner and he had lump on his head when I hit him with a empty milk bottle,I was mortified I had done that as I think myself as a peaceful person,but sometimes anger does strange things to people,We still bump into each other sometimes and laugh about the fact the bottle didn't break! don't see any point in holding hate for him as I was as bad.

We all have had moments in the heat of the moment. Everybody has been in situations where things can boil over but it's a poor defence for a man for 'the red mist' to suddenly descend on him.

Originally Posted by optimisticcynic

Some women are bigger than men. Is it ok for a short man to ht a tall woman? I think the sentiment behind the notion is exactly the one that people complain is misogynistic. If I made an announcement that women shouldn't be in the army as they would be disadvantaged in hand-to-hand combat, I would rightly be set-upon. If people are going to live by their holier-than-thou diatribe, they shouldn't be selective. People shouldn't abuse people, but I refuse to accept that I have less right to be vocal obstinate and invasive of another's personal space than a woman (Luisa) due to the fact that I am male. Dappy's tiny anyway, but stature clearly wasn't the consderation when he was lambasted. Even Luisa mocked him for being a "little man rying to be a gangster".

Great point. Hitting big women is cool. I try to only punch women who are over 6ft1", because those bitches deserve it the most.

[Kyle]

Originally Posted by optimisticcynic

Some women are bigger than men. Is it ok for a short man to ht a tall woman? I think the sentiment behind the notion is exactly the one that people complain is misogynistic. If I made an announcement that women shouldn't be in the army as they would be disadvantaged in hand-to-hand combat, I would rightly be set-upon. If people are going to live by their holier-than-thou diatribe, they shouldn't be selective. People shouldn't abuse people, but I refuse to accept that I have less right to be vocal obstinate and invasive of another's personal space than a woman (Luisa) due to the fact that I am male. Dappy's tiny anyway, but stature clearly wasn't the consderation when he was lambasted. Even Luisa mocked him for being a "little man rying to be a gangster".

This is why Niamh said in general. You can't discount the obvious physical differences IN GENERAL between women and men just because one woman out of the hundred is 6 ft 4 and one other man happens to be 5 ft 3 and in a wheelchair so she could beat him up.

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by optimisticcynic

Some women are bigger than men. Is it ok for a short man to ht a tall woman? I think the sentiment behind the notion is exactly the one that people complain is misogynistic. If I made an announcement that women shouldn't be in the army as they would be disadvantaged in hand-to-hand combat, I would rightly be set-upon. If people are going to live by their holier-than-thou diatribe, they shouldn't be selective. People shouldn't abuse people, but I refuse to accept that I have less right to be vocal obstinate and invasive of another's personal space than a woman (Luisa) due to the fact that I am male. Dappy's tiny anyway, but stature clearly wasn't the consderation when he was lambasted. Even Luisa mocked him for being a "little man rying to be a gangster".

I did say generally speaking and it's not just size, it's muscle mass, men have more whether they're tall or small or whatever, that's a fact. Again, i do agree with you that no one should hit anyone, but I do think it's worse when a stronger person attacks someone weaker yeah, and *generally* speaking most men are stronger then most women

[optimisticcynic]

Originally Posted by Simple Minds

This is my view on it. And wether never laying a hand on a woman is an outdated sentiment or not nowadays to me it is still a noble one and I am quite happy to conform to it.

Dappy could extend that sense of nobility to the belief that the female sex is a more precious and morally pure gender than males and thus, their sexual conduct is expected to reflect this. But that would be misogynistic. When is it permissible to reject implications of current/modern political correctness? I struggle with aspects as well so this is no assault SM, but it does befuddle me at times as to how we attack others, oblivious to the implications of what we ourselves do and say everyday. I open doors for women and let them sit if I'm standing, but am always aware of what I'm ultimately suggesting and would think they were right if they did bollock me for being a rude arse.

[Ammi]

Originally Posted by optimisticcynic

Some women are bigger than men. Is it ok for a short man to ht a tall woman? I think the sentiment behind the notion is exactly the one that people complain is misogynistic. If I made an announcement that women shouldn't be in the army as they would be disadvantaged in hand-to-hand combat, I would rightly be set-upon. If people are going to live by their holier-than-thou diatribe, they shouldn't be selective. People shouldn't abuse people, but I refuse to accept that I have less right to be vocal obstinate and invasive of another's personal space than a woman (Luisa) due to the fact that I am male. Dappy's tiny anyway, but stature clearly wasn't the consderation when he was lambasted. Even Luisa mocked him for being a "little man rying to be a gangster".

..but this is about specifics about Jim and what he's done and the physical injuries to his wife, who wasn't far bigger than him or able to overpower him...

[Ammi]

Originally Posted by Jesus.

Great point. Hitting big women is cool. I try to only punch women who are over 6ft1", because those bitches deserve it the most.

..yeah, they shouldn't really grow above 5'6''.....

[Kyle]

Originally Posted by optimisticcynic

Dappy could extend that sense of nobility to the belief that the female sex is a more precious and morally pure gender than males and thus, their sexual conduct is expected to reflect this. But that would be misogynistic. When is it permissible to reject implications of current/modern political correctness? I struggle with aspects as well so this is no assault SM, but it does befuddle me at times as to how we attack others, oblivious to the implications of what we ourselves do and say everyday. I open doors for women and let them sit if I'm standing, but am always aware of what I'm ultimately suggesting and would think they were right if they did bollock me for being a rude arse.

I understand the concept you are arguing mate and I have been conflicted with this on occasion too.

The way I see it now is it's just good manners and noble for me to open doors for women or let them have your seat on a bus. Ok you might get the odd woman have a go and call you a chauvinist (never happened to me personally) but I think the vast majority of women will see it for what it is which is good decorum and virtue. Don't you ever get women tell you that not enough men are like this nowadays?

I personally have no problem with the rule of never hitting a woman mostly for the reasons Niamh has elegantly put forward. We may strive for equality between the sexes and that's great but ultimately there will still be physical discrepancies between the genders and that's the way I look at it now mate.

[optimisticcynic]

Originally Posted by Ammi

..but this is about specifics about Jim and what he's done and the physical injuries to his wife, who wasn't far bigger than him or able to overpower him...

I disapprove of what he did to another person, not on the man-to-woman basis, as I feel it would be equally as disgraceful had it been to another man. I intentionally make this decision to see if I can practice the equality that I preach and it is exhausting. Next step, I will tell my missus to take the rubbish out herself as it's her blimming week.

I hope he has learnt or is learning from what he was, but he may/may not. Giving him the benefit of the doubt, I have not yet been disappointed. Maybe further down the line, maybe not.

[coolface]

Originally Posted by Simple Minds

I understand the concept you are arguing mate and I have been conflicted with this on occasion too.

The way I see it now is it's just good manners and noble for me to open doors for women or let them have your seat on a bus. Ok you might get the odd woman have a go and call you a chauvinist (never happened to me personally) but I think the vast majority of women will see it for what it is which is good decorum and virtue. Don't you ever get women tell you that not enough men are like this nowadays?

I personally have no problem with the rule of never hitting a woman mostly for the reasons Niamh has elegantly put forward. We may strive for equality between the sexes and that's great but ultimately there will still be physical discrepancies between the genders and that's the way I look at it now mate.

do you seriously give up your set on the bus just because it's a woman?

lmao strong white knight

[Kyle]

Originally Posted by coolface

do you seriously give up your set on the bus just because it's a woman?

lmao strong white knight

Women, elderly, very young kids, people with lots of shopping. Just seemed the right thing to do.

[optimisticcynic]

Originally Posted by coolface

do you seriously give up your set on the bus just because it's a woman?

lmao strong white knight

"strong white knight" - there's a whole new thread! Am reading "blink" by macolm gladwell and it has me all obsessed with the power of language and its implications. Always food for thought on this forum. Need Big Brother all year round!

[Ammi]

Originally Posted by optimisticcynic

I disapprove of what he did to another person, not on the man-to-woman basis, as I feel it would be equally as disgraceful had it been to another man. I intentionally make this decision to see if I can practice the equality that I preach and it is exhausting. Next step, I will tell my missus to take the rubbish out herself as it's her blimming week.

I hope he has learnt or is learning from what he was, but he may/may not. Giving him the benefit of the doubt, I have not yet been disappointed. Maybe further down the line, maybe not.

...oh, I hope she takes her turn and takes the rubbish out next week, then.....

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by Simple Minds

Women, elderly, very young kids, people with lots of shopping. Just seemed the right thing to do.

aww Kyle, such a gent

[optimisticcynic]

Originally Posted by Ammi

...oh, I hope she takes her turn and takes the rubbish out next week, then.....

If I disappear after today, you need to tell the authorities what happened.

[Kyle]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

aww Kyle, such a gent

Thanks fair maiden

There was this one time I was going to college and I had a bad morning and I didn't get up near the back, leaving this elderly woman to stand for the remainder of the journey. Felt guilty all day, I probably just did it so i didn't need to feel bad

[BigBrotherfan4ever]

Originally Posted by Simple Minds

To me there are few things worse a man can do than lay a finger on a woman. Alcoholism or not there is no excuse. I find it very hard to attach myself to a man that has done that I don't care how long ago it was and what he does in the house.

Very well said absolutely agree

[Kyle]

Originally Posted by optimisticcynic

If I disappear after today, you need to tell the authorities what happened.

Just don't you lay a finger on her!

Take your impending murder with manly dignity.

[arista]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

Slap? :

BEAT her regularly, leaving her black and blue and bloodstained.

KICKED her down a flight of stairs in a drunken rage.

SMASHED up their flat while wearing full Army combat uniform.

SLAMMED a weight-lifting bar- bell into her ribs.

THREW her out of their car miles from home.

Yes he did not get on with that one
He now has a Younger Lady

So thats all in the past.

[optimisticcynic]

Originally Posted by Simple Minds

Just don't you lay a finger on her!

Take your impending murder with manly dignity.

Will even chop some wood and build a fire beforehand in case she decides to burn my corpse. She can wash the knives once she's pulled them out of me as that's her job...

[Kyle]

Originally Posted by optimisticcynic

Will even chop some wood and build a fire beforehand in case she decides to burn my corpse. She can wash the knives once she's pulled them out of me as that's her job...

That's the spirit.

[Z]

Originally Posted by Jesus.

Great point. Hitting big women is cool. I try to only punch women who are over 6ft1", because those bitches deserve it the most.

I properly just LOLed at this

[jet]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

Slap? :

BEAT her regularly, leaving her black and blue and bloodstained.

KICKED her down a flight of stairs in a drunken rage.

SMASHED up their flat while wearing full Army combat uniform.

SLAMMED a weight-lifting bar- bell into her ribs.

THREW her out of their car miles from home.

I personally think that a man who could do those things to the mother of his children has an intrinsically nasty nature that can maybe be curbed, but not changed. Not to mention his self confessed chauvinism, his 'past' homophobia and racism etc.
However, I can understand that some want to give him the benefit of the doubt and that is fine.
What I don’t get is the over – the – top support for him and how to some he can do no wrong in the house. I have seen him being snide, manipulative and two faced yet his supporters never see this – as I said in another thread:

His unpopularity in the house is Linda's fault, Luisa's fault, Jasmine's fault, Lionel's fault. It's a lack of sleep, it's the noise etc etc etc.
Nothing is ever Jim's fault. He is never responsible for the way others perceive him. Everything they do is wrong and he is always right.
Poor Jim.

He is being made out as some kind of poor saintly victim. For a man with his history it’s quite incomprehensible to a lot of people that he isn’t just given the benefit of the doubt but is admired and applauded for what exactly? – keeping his temper under control and not lashing out at someone? What a changed man!
It’s not as if he is even that likeable – he’s miserable and not very entertaining. The other HM’s obviously aren’t keen on him as they have nearly all nominated him. So what is making people support him so passionately and part with their hard earned money to vote for him?

It’s puzzling for sure.

[Bojangles]

Originally Posted by Chuck

How long ago did It happen?

Nearly 40 years ago.