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Old 11-08-2011, 01:39 AM #1
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Im in love with my bed, but my alarm clock wont let us be together
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Old 11-08-2011, 03:59 PM #2
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"You go on holiday and leave Nick Cleg in charge for five minutes..." - I laughed so hard when I saw that.
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Old 11-08-2011, 04:33 PM #3
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Fist pumping in church when your favorite hymn comes on
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Old 12-08-2011, 07:08 PM #4
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Next week on jeremy kyle - 'i fink my gf cheated whilst i was out rioting
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Old 12-08-2011, 07:39 PM #5
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Frank Gallagher to sort out the Manchester riots cause then they'll scatter
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Old 13-08-2011, 12:22 AM #6
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Roses are red. FB is blue. You look bangable, so I'll add you
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Old 14-08-2011, 03:48 PM #7
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Gluing coconuts to your dog's feet so neighbours think you have a horse
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Old 14-08-2011, 03:59 PM #8
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Old 14-08-2011, 04:12 PM #9
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Old 14-08-2011, 05:53 PM #10
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Lying naked on your floor screaming Adele lyrics at your 27 cats
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Old 16-08-2011, 02:02 PM #11
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Wearing a grim reaper suit while standing outside a nursing home
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Old 16-08-2011, 03:32 PM #12
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Emotionally breaking down after playing a magnificent triangle solo.
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Old 16-08-2011, 03:33 PM #13
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Not looting cause my mum didnt bring me up on turkey dinosaurs and stella.

If her shoes light up, she too young for you bro.

Sticking your dick in a Bread Bag 'cos Condoms don't fit

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Emotionally breaking down on Jeremy Kyle when Graham comes out
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Old 16-08-2011, 07:08 PM #14
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The moment of heartbreak when your pet jumps off your bed & leaves the room
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Old 16-08-2011, 07:22 PM #15
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Don't worry, I'm an artist...now get naked
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Old 16-08-2011, 07:34 PM #16
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Using Wd-40 as lube during sex cus ur a ****in machine

Having absolutely no self-control at a buffet.
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Old 16-08-2011, 07:37 PM #17
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'How many drinks have you had tonight sir', "Yeah good thanks"
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Old 17-08-2011, 04:15 PM #18
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Moon Walking Through A Riot Because You're A Smooth Criminal

Slags who slag off other slags for being slags
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Old 17-08-2011, 04:20 PM #19
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Moon Walking Through A Riot Because You're A Smooth Criminal

Slags who slag off other slags for being slags
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Old 17-08-2011, 07:01 PM #20
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Here's my cup of give a ****, \_/ Oh look it's empty, so jog on.
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Old 17-08-2011, 07:33 PM #21
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Being a top African and getting the water in for the boys
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Old 17-08-2011, 09:51 PM #22
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Violently fist pumping to Adele.

Emotionally breaking down after playing a magnificent triangle solo.

Sometimes i lay on the kitchen floor and pretend to be a crumb.
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Old 17-08-2011, 09:52 PM #23
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Painting your child blue so your neighbours think you own a smurf.
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Old 17-08-2011, 09:57 PM #24
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Not caring about your education because you fully expect to win the Lottery
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Old 17-08-2011, 09:59 PM #25
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