[Benjamin]

Do you believe that children from single parent families are worse off than those from two parent ones?

[Kerry]

Afraid this will be another 'on the fence' kind of answer but it really depends on circumstances

On the whole, yes, I think children do benefit more from both parents in their lives. Of course they do. But equally a two parent family where there are nothing but arguments will soul destroy a child

[Jessica.]

My father died when I was three, my mother "raised" me, I am messed up.

[Shaun]

not necessarily. Two-parent families can have all sorts of problems - domestic violence, sexual abuse, divorce...

[Stacey.]

Yeah in general probably

And LOL at your sig Shaun

[Locke.]

No.

All depends on what the parent(s) is like.

[Angus]

Well I never set out to be a single parent; I got married, had two kids, and endured several years of domestic abuse till I finally left when my kids were aged 5 and 8. It was a hard slog as I had no financial support from my ex, and no moral support from family, my parents being dead and my siblings married and living far away, but it was also the most rewarding and challenging thing I ever did bringing up my boys and being both mum and dad to them. They are now aged 22 and 25 respectively and are both in full time work, with their own homes, own lives and own responsbilities. I think I did the best job I could, and they both tell me they had happy childhoods - we three are still very close as we were such a tight family unit for so long.

Not all single parents are feckless, sponging, teenagers: A lot of us are self supporting, responsible people who find ourselves single parents because of divorce, bereavement or whatever, and do the very best we can in difficult circumstances. It's not the quantity of parents that counts, it's the quality of the parenting.

[arista]

Originally Posted by Jessica.

My father died when I was three, my mother "raised" me, I am messed up.

No No

You are much more Stronger Jess.



Life In The City.

[Livia]

I would say it depends on the parent/s.

[CharlieO]

ive had both parents and it definitely hasn't been beneficial to me. my family is now mucked up. but yeah depends on parents.

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by angus58

Well I never set out to be a single parent; I got married, had two kids, and endured several years of domestic abuse till I finally left when my kids were aged 5 and 8. It was a hard slog as I had no financial support from my ex, and no moral support from family, my parents being dead and my siblings married and living far away, but it was also the most rewarding and challenging thing I ever did bringing up my boys and being both mum and dad to them. They are now aged 22 and 25 respectively and are both in full time work, with their own homes, own lives and own responsbilities. I think I did the best job I could, and they both tell me they had happy childhoods - we three are still very close as we were such a tight family unit for so long.

Not all single parents are feckless, sponging, teenagers: A lot of us are self supporting, responsible people who find ourselves single parents because of divorce, bereavement or whatever, and do the very best we can in difficult circumstances. It's not the quantity of parents that counts, it's the quality of the parenting.

This definitely. I mean in an ideal world you would have a wonderful mother and a wonderful father but life isn't always like that, having either a good mother or father is better than having two useless parents. And in your situation Angus you were probably a much better parent on your own then you would have been had you stayed in the relationship.

[Tom.]

It depends completely on the individual parent and how good their skills are.

[BB_Eye]

Most of the single parents I know had to leave the child's father, because he was either a deadbeat or an abusive arsehole. In both cases, the child is, by far, better off with the one parent.

[Jessica.]

Originally Posted by arista

No No

You are much more Stronger Jess.



Life In The City.

k

[Niall]

My Mum left when I was 5 and I think my Dad has done a pretty good job bringing me up.

Like Angus said, its the quality of the parenting that counts.

[Angus]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

This definitely. I mean in an ideal world you would have a wonderful mother and a wonderful father but life isn't always like that, having either a good mother or father is better than having two useless parents. And in your situation Angus you were probably a much better parent on your own then you would have been had you stayed in the relationship.

Oh, it was definitely the right thing for me to go it alone - the boys would have been really messed up if they had grown up in such an abusive relationship. I'm not exaggerating when I say that there were times when I feared my kids would be left without a mother. That experience motivated me to make sure my boys did not grow up to be abusive men, and I can proudly say, job done.

[Ninastar]

It definitely depends on the parent(s)

[Tom4784]

Quality over quantity. You could have a family that flourishes with a great single parent and another that's drowning under two bad ones and vice versa.

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by angus58

Oh, it was definitely the right thing for me to go it alone - the boys would have been really messed up if they had grown up in such an abusive relationship. I'm not exaggerating when I say that there were times when I feared my kids would be left without a mother. That experience motivated me to make sure my boys did not grow up to be abusive men, and I can proudly say, job done.

yeah, that's the danger of bringing your kids up with abuse going on, kids copy what they see. You definitely did the right and a brave thing getting yourselves out of there.

[Pyramid*]

Not necessarily. Single mums get banded - but I'd far rather someone be brought up in a loving, caring, kind 'single mum' relationship - than living with 2 parents that rowed, fought, argued, didn't get on and didn't give a damn for the child/ren.

Plenty of single parent families do their kids proud. Plenty of 2 parents - who aren't fit to look after an ant.

[Benjamin]

Originally Posted by Pyramid*

Not necessarily. Single mums get banded - but I'd far rather someone be brought up in a loving, caring, kind 'single mum' relationship - than living with 2 parents that rowed, fought, argued, didn't get on and didn't give a damn for the child/ren.

Plenty of single parent families do their kids proud. Plenty of 2 parents - who aren't fit to look after an ant.

Absolutely. My mother brought 3 of us up after my father passed away and did a great job of raising us.

[Vicky.]

Very much depends on the person/people I think.

[Angus]

When you think about it, there must have been thousands and thousands of single mothers during WW2, whose husbands were killed or missing. In fact even those whose husbands survived the war had been bringing up their kids for 4 or 5 years alone anyway. There was no song and dance made of it then, women just had to get on with it. The only difference being, and it is an important difference, is that there were closer knit communities and extended families living close by to help out.

I am certainly not suggesting it is the ideal scenario, two good parents is always going to be the ideal. It must be great to have a loving, responsible father around as you grow up. At least I always imagined so since I had an alcoholic, sometimes violent, irresponsible one whom I loved and hated in equal measure - that ambivalence towards a parent is not a good emotion to deal with.

[Benjamin]

Originally Posted by angus58

When you think about it, there must have been thousands and thousands of single mothers during WW2, whose husbands were killed or missing. In fact even those whose husbands survived the war had been bringing up their kids for 4 or 5 years alone anyway. There was no song and dance made of it then, women just had to get on with it. The only difference being, and it is an important difference, is that there were closer knit communities and extended families living close by to help out.

I am certainly not suggesting it is the ideal scenario, two good parents is always going to be the ideal. It must be great to have a loving, responsible father around as you grow up. At least I always imagined so since I had an alcoholic, sometimes violent, irresponsible one whom I loved and hated in equal measure - that ambivalence towards a parent is not a good emotion to deal with.

Luckily for my mother we lived in a really close-knit neighbourhood. I have always wondered what my life would be like or what I would be like if my father was still alive. It makes me sad sometimes thinking about that.

[LeatherTrumpet]

Looking at the big numbers, 2 parents are much better than one.