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Old 09-02-2014, 06:57 PM #1
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Default Man responsible for olympic malfunction found dead

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The man responsible for operating the Olympic Rings during last night’s Winter Olympics opening ceremony in Russia was found dead today.

According to local reports the body of Boris Avdeyev was found his hotel room early this morning with multiple stab wounds.

Avdeyev was a technical specialist responsible for the Olympic Ring spectacle, which embarrassingly malfunctioned last night. Five animatronic snowflakes were supposed to transform into Olympic Rings. The first four functioned properly but the fifth snowflake failed to change shape.

Although his body was badly mangled and the wounds were consistent with a struggle, so far officials say they don't suspect foul play.

“Sure there were stab wounds and bruises all over the body,” admits the lead investigator on the case. “But who knows what caused them. Maybe he tripped and fell on a set of knives. Right now we’re ruling this an accidental death.

“It’s terrible when accidents like this happen. But then again, maybe Mr. Avdeyev should have thought twice before he screwed up the Olympics. Accidents tend to happen to people who betray Russia.”

Despite the government’s story, fellow hotel guests reported hearing a struggle in Avdeyev’s room around 3 a.m. local time.
fell on a set of knives.. are they serious [IMG]http://exhalecdn.breatheheavy.com/public/style_emoticons/default/***********[/IMG]
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Old 09-02-2014, 06:58 PM #2
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It's a hoax
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You're giving me a million reasons about a million reasons

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Old 09-02-2014, 06:59 PM #3
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Satire
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Old 09-02-2014, 06:59 PM #4
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omfg [IMG]http://exhalecdn.breatheheavy.com/public/style_emoticons/default/***********[/IMG]
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Old 09-02-2014, 06:59 PM #5
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Wouldn't more than 1 person have been working on it though?
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Old 09-02-2014, 06:59 PM #6
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gotta love the onion. <3
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Old 09-02-2014, 07:01 PM #7
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Hahaha I love these funny fake news stories.


The one the other week about North Korea claiming they had an astronaut land on the sun at night had me in stitches
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Old 09-02-2014, 07:02 PM #8
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I actually believed this
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Old 09-02-2014, 07:07 PM #9
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Quote:
Accidents tend to happen to people who betray Russia
They call not opening one Olympic Rings betraying Russia [IMG]http://exhalecdn.breatheheavy.com/public/style_emoticons/default/***********[/IMG]

I know it's a hoax but seriously
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Old 09-02-2014, 07:09 PM #10
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Remember the hoax about the girl who Justin Beiber called a beached whale being found dead lying in greasy foods and dirty mattresses
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Old 09-02-2014, 07:15 PM #11
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lmao I can't at @ "Accidents tend to happen to people who betray Russia". I wish this was real
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Old 09-02-2014, 07:17 PM #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Petemitch123 View Post
They call not opening one Olympic Rings betraying Russia [IMG]http://exhalecdn.breatheheavy.com/public/style_emoticons/default/***********[/IMG]

I know it's a hoax but seriously
But the fact it's a hoax means that's not a real statement..
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Old 16-02-2014, 08:30 AM #13
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I bet he really is dead though
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