[Ronald.]

Hello forum

Here's one for you. Each morning I pop to the shop to fetch a paper, some milk and any other odd groceries we are running low on. On my journey there and back each day I must walk past a few homeless people and a big issue seller. I'm asking it is wrong to ignore and blank beggars and people who try and talk to you? This applies also to people trying to sell you stuff or asking to donate money to charity . I'm a compassionate and polite man but the number of times I get stopped, especially in the city is out of control now. I know I never would, but sometimes I just want to keep my head down and ignore everybody!

Especially with homeless people. There's so many homeless people in the city centre I feel like an awful people to say no to every single person who stops me but I can't donate to everyone! Its somewhat demoralizing! I just apologise and wish them a good day, but I feel bad even doing that . Just the other week, one replied "I probably won't I've got no food or shelter" . I felt awful!

As for people handing out flyers I suppose it's not so bad to walk past them but I still feel rude doing so!


What do you think forum? Do you blank people on the streets , homeless or sales/ flyers people ?

Ron

[ebandit]

...free country...............do as ya choose

.....i'm always ignoring people...previous friends...neighbours i don't care for etc

Mark L

[waterhog]

very good debate Ronald - it is a tricky one but one thing you failed to mention was the scam - and there are scammers.


correct advice is not to give to them and give to charity - but even I fail at this sometimes. especially when its freezing.

[Ronald.]

Originally Posted by waterhog

very good debate Ronald - it is a tricky one but one thing you failed to mention was the scam - and there are scammers.


correct advice is not to give to them and give to charity - but even I fail at this sometimes. especially when its freezing.

Very true. Lots of people are sceptical about giving money to homeless people as they think they will spend the money on cigarettes or drink. However, I can't help but feel if they're sitting on the streets in the freezing cold, with dirty blankets begging for money... whatever they want the money for, the fact they're on the street alone means they're worse off than me.

Most homeless people (the ones in Cardiff and Swansea at least) are always very polite too. When I say no, they wish me a good day and they thank for me my time . Makes me feel bad as i walk off! My wife doesn't give money to the homeless either - she says the homeless are a symptom of inequality in society, and treating a symptom doesn't heal the "disease." R.

[Ronald.]

My wife has no qualms about walking past people on the street. Homeless folk, big issue sellers, charity workers... whoever, she blanks them all. I'm the opposite, i can't help but stop, even if it is to say i'm not interested. R.

[user104658]

It's difficult really. In a smaller town where there are not many people I'd never ignore anyone. But in some places there are so many homeless people that if you talked to them all, you wouldn't ever stop.

If spoken to directly though I always at least acknowledge them though, like if asked for money I'd say "no, sorry"... Straight up blanking someone when you've clearly heard them is a step too far. You can't just pretend that people don't exist because it makes you uncomfortable to acknowledge them as human.

[Ronald.]

Originally Posted by Toy Soldier

It's difficult really. In a smaller town where there are not many people I'd never ignore anyone. But in some places there are so many homeless people that if you talked to them all, you wouldn't ever stop.

If spoken to directly though I always at least acknowledge them though, like if asked for money I'd say "no, sorry"... Straight up blanking someone when you've clearly heard them is a step too far. You can't just pretend that people don't exist because it makes you uncomfortable to acknowledge them as human.

That's true and that's how i feel about it. No matter how much it tempts me, living in a big city full of homeless people, I couldn't walk past a homeless if they called out for me it just because i felt uncomfortable. They are human too and must feel like pieces of crap when people walk past them like they're rubbish on the street. R.

[Kizzy]

Chuggers no, nor anyone attempting to give me leafelets about windows/credit cards. But the homeless I give eye contact and smile, if I have change I'll give something but not always and it's usually about 50p.
I wouldn't want to dehumanise anyone by acting like they don't exist, I am well aware that like many I'm prob 3 wage slips away myself.

[Kazanne]

I always give to buskers,sometimes the homeless,depends on whether I have change on me,I used to give to The Big issue every week but it ended up where he started following me and shouting after me to buy one,so I try to avoid him as much as possible and don't buy one at all now,I do find people on the street who stop you for the surveys though do annoy me a lot and I try not to make eye contact,lol.

[DemolitionRed]

A lot of these people aren’t technically homeless. They often live in hostels but don’t get enough social to survive without begging. Observe how many more beggars there are towards the end of the week and the weekend than at the beginning of the week. These people must find a way to make ends meet when the money runs out. Also consider that a lot of homeless or critically poor people suffer from mental illness and rely on self-medicating (which often doesn’t work when a persons mentally ill) and or have addictions and being an ex smoker, I know how hard it is to kick an addiction; especially if you are feeling low.

Then there are scammers who just see begging as a means to make tax free money. Scammers often ask for bus fare or a cigarette so I always deny them but I do give to people who look genuinely down and out. I also give a couple of quid to my local Big Issue guy but don’t take the magazine and I’ve been known to buy multi packs of socks in Primark and give those to someone who looks like they need them more than I do.

[armand.kay]

I feel really rude when i ignore beggars so I guess it is bad. Big issue i have no problem ignoring them.

The trouble is though I'm an extremely awkward in public and i can't even begin to tell you the anxiety that sudden on the street encounters gives me.

[Cherie]

Originally Posted by Kizzy

Chuggers no, nor anyone attempting to give me leafelets about windows/credit cards. But the homeless I give eye contact and smile, if I have change I'll give something but not always and it's usually about 50p.
I wouldn't want to dehumanise anyone by acting like they don't exist, I am well aware that like many I'm prob 3 wage slips away myself.

Chuggers, I say not today, they are generally students trying to make a few quid, generally take leaflets and then bin them as again they are doing a job, homeless, depends on the situation I buy food, or small change, or I say sorry no change if I'm in a rush, I buy the Big Issue now and again, don't see her very often though.

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by Toy Soldier

It's difficult really. In a smaller town where there are not many people I'd never ignore anyone. But in some places there are so many homeless people that if you talked to them all, you wouldn't ever stop.

If spoken to directly though I always at least acknowledge them though, like if asked for money I'd say "no, sorry"... Straight up blanking someone when you've clearly heard them is a step too far. You can't just pretend that people don't exist because it makes you uncomfortable to acknowledge them as human.

Yeah i agree with this, I would be more inclined to give money to a big issue seller though than someone who is just begging

[Kizzy]

Originally Posted by Cherie

I see your little snide face.

I meant I don't give them money or take a leaflet...not that I deny their existence

[Cherie]

Originally Posted by Kizzy

I see your little snide face.

I meant I don't give them money or take a leaflet...not that I deny their existence

its not snide, its : suspect: and you know that

[Ronald.]

That's always my concern about big issues sellers. I do the same route every day and feel if i buy a copy one day, they might recognise my face and i might be expected to buy another the next time. R.

[Kizzy]

Originally Posted by Cherie

its not snide, its : suspect: and you know that

Oh yeah.... silly me

[Braden]

I always feel bad walking past homless people, Ronald. There are many where I live at university, but normally when they ask I say "No, sorry." with a smile—they seem to appreciate that I acknowledge them rather than just ignoring them completely.

[Ronald.]

There is one beggar who sits by the cash point on St Marys Street in the centre and he tries to start a conversation with you if you use it. Before you've even had a chance to collect your cash from the ATM he's asking for some. That makes me extremely uncomfortable, so I use a different ATM now if i'm in the area. That's more avoiding than ignoring though. R.

[Braden]

Originally Posted by Ronald.

There is one beggar who sits by the cash point on St Marys Street in the centre and he tries to start a conversation with you if you use it. Before you've even had a chance to collect your cash from the ATM he's asking for some. That makes me extremely uncomfortable, so I use a different ATM now if i'm in the area. That's more avoiding than ignoring though. R.

Yeah, same with where I live at uni. I have discussions with my flat-mates who say they feel intimidated by those near the ATM machines. Also, there's one guy in particular who I've came across more than once who lies about having an allergic reaction and the 'need for money to get home'; I felt bad the first time but the second I just ignored completely. I guess circumstance and context plays a part.

[Ronald.]

Originally Posted by Braden

Yeah, same with where I live at uni. I have discussions with my flat-mates who say they feel intimidated by those near the ATM machines. Also, there's one guy in particular who I've came across more than once who lies about having an allergic reaction and the 'need for money to get home'; I felt bad the first time but the second I just ignored completely. I guess circumstance and context plays a part.

Yes i agree, it is intimidating in a sense. You feel cornered a bit, especially those with more social anxiety. R.

[Livia]

I never give time to chuggers, sales people etc. but I always buy a Big Issue, usually from the same chap... although I'll sometimes pay for a Big Issue from someone else and not take it. Homelessness is a shame on this country and I support Shelter, I don't tend to give money in the street though, apart from the Big Issue thing.

[smudgie]

Thankfully I live in my own bubble.
We don't have any beggars or homeless in our little village/estate, I have never seen any in our nearest town.
There are plenty in the bigger towns around but I don't really frequent them.
I am afraid I would just say "not today thanks" if I was approached on the street.
Same as the charity chuggers, or door knockers.
We donate to charity through choice not by demand.

[Ronald.]

I see a few of those Christian pop up stands around the place. I like the people on those because they don't hassle you, they don't even try to grab your attention and interrupt your day. You simply approach them should you wish to chat about their stall and what they have to talk about. R.

[Brillopad]

Originally Posted by Ronald.

I see a few of those Christian pop up stands around the place. I like the people on those because they don't hassle you, they don't even try to grab your attention and interrupt your day. You simply approach them should you wish to chat about their stall and what they have to talk about. R.

That is the way to do it. The more someone attempts to hassle me on the street the less I will listen. I prefer to contribute to charities the proper way and don't feel obliged or inclined to respond to the pushy ones.