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Old 07-06-2011, 11:24 PM #1
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Default Do You Ever Wonder?

This is for those that only have one parent/no living parents, but do you ever wonder what your life would be like if they hadn't have passed away?


I sometimes wish my father was here, and what my life would have been like if he was still around. Would he be proud of me, would I be the same person.


The only thing I do know is that I would have moved to Australia just before he passed away, he got a job there. So I imagine I would be completely different.
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Old 07-06-2011, 11:25 PM #2
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I think mine would probably still be the same, but then again its only been just over 1 year.
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Old 07-06-2011, 11:29 PM #3
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I think mine would probably still be the same, but then again its only been just over 1 year.
Oh, sorry to hear that matey. I lost my father when I was 4, so in some ways I never had to deal with the complete heart breaking pain, but then I never got as many memories. I suppose there is never a good time to lose a parent.

You seem to be holding up well though.
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Old 07-06-2011, 11:30 PM #4
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Never had a Father, never missed having one.

My Mother died a few months ago and that was really hard. My life was already on its own path so it won't affect it other than me not having her there as a comfort and safety net. But my character was shaped already. She did her job.
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Old 07-06-2011, 11:31 PM #5
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Never had a Father, never missed having one.

My Mother died a few months ago and that was really hard. My life was already on its own path so it won't affect it other than me not having her there as a comfort and safety net. But my character was shaped already. She did her job.
That is a really nice sentiment to have.
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Old 07-06-2011, 11:33 PM #6
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Maybe I'd be more confident with the world and I know I'd have been happier over the last few years.

Also getting to know him as a person would change me I think, all I have is stories from other family members.

And I would have traveled more.
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Old 07-06-2011, 11:35 PM #7
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My Dad is alive, I just never see him.

But yeah, I would probably not have as many feminine traits and I would probably be a chav and would never of joined TiBB or got into Big Brother, oh my god.

I have some feminine traits because I was raised by 2 Woman, no my Mum isn't a lesbian - I mean her and my Aunt; so for years I was missing a father figure.

I'd be a chav because I wouldn't of moved house so I'd of stayed in the same crazy area all my life.
I may of been happier though, because I wouldn't of been alone and got depressed and eventually went slightly insane on my own.

I wouldn't of joined TiBB because I would be out drinking every night and wouldn't know how to work a computer - and I wouldn't of liked BB, because I first watched BB in 2002 when I was in a hostel after my Dad and Mum broke up.



So yeah - Jesus, Butterfly Effect much?

My Dad's came pretty close to death loads of times though.
He's tried to kill himself - whilst I was in the house rofl; He's been shot, Ran over and most recently stabbed.


But if he did die - I probably wouldn't be that concerned. [Feels mean].
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Old 07-06-2011, 11:41 PM #8
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My Dad is alive, I just never see him.

But yeah, I would probably not have as many feminine traits and I would probably be a chav and would never of joined TiBB or got into Big Brother, oh my god.

I have some feminine traits because I was raised by 2 Woman, no my Mum isn't a lesbian - I mean her and my Aunt; so for years I was missing a father figure.

I'd be a chav because I wouldn't of moved house so I'd of stayed in the same crazy area all my life.
I may of been happier though, because I wouldn't of been alone and got depressed and eventually went slightly insane on my own.

I wouldn't of joined TiBB because I would be out drinking every night and wouldn't know how to work a computer - and I wouldn't of liked BB, because I first watched BB in 2002 when I was in a hostel after my Dad and Mum broke up.



So yeah - Jesus, Butterfly Effect much?

My Dad's came pretty close to death loads of times though.
He's tried to kill himself - whilst I was in the house rofl; He's been shot, Ran over and most recently stabbed.


But if he did die - I probably wouldn't be that concerned. [Feels mean].

I grew up with my mother and two sisters. I like my feminine traits, as I see them as extra skills that help me adapt and interact with a wider variety of people.

But you should not say that about your father, you only get one lot of parents. When they are gone, they are gone for good.
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Old 07-06-2011, 11:42 PM #9
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Not a clue but know VERY different. I lived in a "well to do" area. Was set for the finest schools money could buy. All that bollocks. Mam died, Dad pissed it up the wall. I got to live with the best Nan ever on a council estate (after being moved from pillar to post) and, well voila A working class Sheffield lass and proud as punch

I'd have loved to have known my Mam better but I don't know of anything else
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Old 07-06-2011, 11:43 PM #10
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Only Patrick could squeeze a rofl into a sentence about his dad trying to kill himself!
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Old 07-06-2011, 11:49 PM #11
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This thread sorta applies to me. Both of my parents are still alive and I regularly see both of them its just my Mum has always lived abroad since I was 5. I've always wondered what my life would've been like had my parents actually stayed together. I missed my Mum so much sometimes, 'cause no matter how hard my Dad can try, he can't really supplement her whilst she's not here.

If my parents were still together I guess I'd be a little less shy and I probably wouldn't have had separation anxiety when I was younger. Everytime I had to go to the airport I knew I'd have to leave one parent behind for another and I'd always be in floods of tears and I'd literally do anything to avoid going to the airport. I hated the idea of leaving one parent to see the other. Whenever I'd be with my Mum the first full day I'd be with her, it'd take me that full day to adjust and lose the feelings of sadness I'd feel from leaving Dad. The same thing would happen at home (only with the parents reversed) and it'd usually take me longer to recover.

So I'd probably be a more confident and outgoing person which means I'd probably have never discovered this wonderful website and you guys and probs be some chavvy mong who just cares about getting ****faced every weekend. :/
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Old 07-06-2011, 11:57 PM #12
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I grew up with my mother and two sisters. I like my feminine traits, as I see them as extra skills that help me adapt and interact with a wider variety of people.

But you should not say that about your father, you only get one lot of parents. When they are gone, they are gone for good.
Same; It's like they get you made fun of in school and that - but I suppose you're right they help you in life.

So it's all good.

I know I shouldn't, I want to like him and that - but over the years he's ******ed up too many times and it's like if he died, It wouldn't effect me as much as it should do, which is a shame.
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Old 08-06-2011, 03:42 PM #13
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Out of control...
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Old 08-06-2011, 03:43 PM #14
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This is for those that only have one parent/no living parents, but do you ever wonder what your life would be like if they hadn't have passed away?


I sometimes wish my father was here, and what my life would have been like if he was still around. Would he be proud of me, would I be the same person.


The only thing I do know is that I would have moved to Australia just before he passed away, he got a job there. So I imagine I would be completely different.
I'm really sorry to hear about that.
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Old 08-06-2011, 03:44 PM #15
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I couldn't imagine my life without them to be honest. god knows how you all survived, but my hats off to you all.
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Old 08-06-2011, 03:50 PM #16
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I actually think (well know really) that if my dad had been around, my life wouldn't have been as good as it has been.
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Old 08-06-2011, 03:53 PM #17
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All fathers love their sons

never forget that
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Old 08-06-2011, 03:59 PM #18
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And yes Ben, I think he would have been very proud of you.
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Old 08-06-2011, 04:02 PM #19
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My Father died when I was 3, I think my life would be so different if he hadn't died, I don't think I would be as messed up tbh. :S I'm not sure though.
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Old 08-06-2011, 04:05 PM #20
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I know I don't fit in to this category because my parents aren't dead but I no longer live with my father.

My dad never made an effort with me and made it very verbally clear that I was not the son he wanted, he travelled for work a lot and I hardly ever saw him as a child. So in teenage years we never really spoke other than hello.

He has always been really angry and not able to control his temper but it never seemed to be a problem until recently.

In april 2010 he got angry at me because I said f off to him. He then broke my arm. He had gone into this mode where he was almost possessed. It scared me so much and I could no longer live with him so my mum agreed to make him move out.

I know if I had had a father who cared I would be so different. My story is clearly very selfish compared to those who have lost family members but being abused by a parent isnt just physical pain. It has mucked me up so much. Everytime I hear his voice I cant help but cry and shake with fear. My mum understands how it has affected me but he doesnt. He used to come to the house pretty much when ever he wants and laughed at me and called me a panzy.

Then in october I was home alone and he came round and threatened me. He basically said about how I had ****ed up his marriage and how unless I gave up this 'act' he would hurt me even more. I thought he was bluffing and tried to get away. Then he threw a knife and me and it went deep in my leg. I have a massive scar from it.

After that my mum wouldn't let him come to the house but she always sees him and so do my two sisters and they act like its all my fault most of the time so yea.
I actually wish I had a father figure because I also have several feminine traits that i get bullied at school because of and I wish I had a dad that would actually be there for me and care.
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Old 08-06-2011, 04:07 PM #21
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Jesus Charlie!
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Old 08-06-2011, 04:08 PM #22
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OMG Charlie, that's horrific. I'm sure your sisters don't really think it's your fault and if they do then they are very wrong
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Old 08-06-2011, 04:09 PM #23
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Oh, sorry to hear that matey.[B] I lost my father [/B]when I was 4, so in some ways I never had to deal with the complete heart breaking pain, but then I never got as many memories. I suppose there is never a good time to lose a parent.

You seem to be holding up well though.
I lost my father when I was a lot older. He was an amazing person and I felt that I not only lost a loved one, but I lost my inspiration in life as well. I know he would be proud of me because I am what he inspired me to be. I miss being able to tell him lots of things but I know he did everything he needed to do so I try not to be too sad.
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Old 08-06-2011, 04:13 PM #24
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I know I don't fit in to this category because my parents aren't dead but I no longer live with my father.

My dad never made an effort with me and made it very verbally clear that I was not the son he wanted, he travelled for work a lot and I hardly ever saw him as a child. So in teenage years we never really spoke other than hello.

He has always been really angry and not able to control his temper but it never seemed to be a problem until recently.

In april 2010 he got angry at me because I said f off to him. He then broke my arm. He had gone into this mode where he was almost possessed. It scared me so much and I could no longer live with him so my mum agreed to make him move out.

I know if I had had a father who cared I would be so different. My story is clearly very selfish compared to those who have lost family members but being abused by a parent isnt just physical pain. It has mucked me up so much. Everytime I hear his voice I cant help but cry and shake with fear. My mum understands how it has affected me but he doesnt. He used to come to the house pretty much when ever he wants and laughed at me and called me a panzy.

Then in october I was home alone and he came round and threatened me. He basically said about how I had ****ed up his marriage and how unless I gave up this 'act' he would hurt me even more. I thought he was bluffing and tried to get away. Then he threw a knife and me and it went deep in my leg. I have a massive scar from it.

After that my mum wouldn't let him come to the house but she always sees him and so do my two sisters and they act like its all my fault most of the time so yea.
I actually wish I had a father figure because I also have several feminine traits that i get bullied at school because of and I wish I had a dad that would actually be there for me and care.

don't feel any of that is your fault
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Old 08-06-2011, 04:15 PM #25
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Jesus Charlie!
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OMG Charlie, that's horrific. I'm sure your sisters don't really think it's your fault and if they do then they are very wrong
Thanks guys.

No they don't think its entirely my fault but they don't seem to understand how I couldn't live with him and think I was just being ridiculous.

But due to it I have gone quite crazy. Im better now, but the last year did consist of some dark times. I wont go into details as I don't want to seem as if I'm fishing for sympathy. I just got major depression from home life and then being bullied at school.

But in the long run it will make me stronger, already has to an extent.
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