[Ammi]

A mother-to-be has said she was left 'humiliated' after she was refused a small glass of wine because she is heavily pregnant.

Jane Hampson, 37, said she would usually enjoy one 125ml glass of red wine a week with a meal after reading research which suggested it was medically acceptable.

But the Deutsche Bank worker, who is overdue with her first baby, was left dumbfounded after a barman at Pi bar, in Liverpool, told her: 'Sorry, I can't serve you.'

When she asked him why, the bartender said: 'I refuse to have serving alcohol to pregnant women on my conscience.'

The exchange attracted the attention of other customers at the busy bar as Miss Hampson and her partner Alistair Townend, 37, asked for an explanation.

Miss Hampson said they eventually left the bar out of embarrassment and bought a glass of red wine elsewhere.

The NHS currently advises pregnant women should drink no more than one to two units of alcohol once or twice a week - the equivalent of a 125ml glass of wine.

As bar bosses today apologised for the snub, Miss Hampson, from Mossley Hill, Liverpool, said: 'I couldn’t believe it - it was so humiliating.

'There is no way I would endanger my unborn baby yet it was being insinuated that I was doing just that and being irresponsible.

'At the time the bar was packed and all the customers were looking over at us to see what all the commotion was about. We felt we had no choice but to leave because it was so embarrassing

'The fact I am pregnant was none of his business. I appreciate a bar’s management reserve the right not to serve customers but obviously I wasn’t drunk or misbehaving or under 18 - so he had no reason not to serve me.

'I am not some Vicky Pollard-type binge drinker. I have done extensive research on the effects of drinking alcohol when pregnant and the fact is there’s nothing wrong with having a small glass of wine every week.

'I have enjoyed a small glass of red wine with a meal once a week throughout my pregnancy but it’s not been every week

'I would describe myself as health-conscious. I have run two marathons in the past and I am not into filling my body with anything that shouldn’t be there.

'When you look at how much of an issue excess alcohol causes in this country, I really don’t feel that any establishment that chooses to profit from alcohol sales is in any position to judge anyone.'

The incident occurred after Miss Hampson decided to take a long walk with Mr Townend around Liverpool’s Sefton Park on Tuesday night. After their stroll the couple, who have been together for 10 months, headed to nearby Pi bar

Miss Hampson, who works as an intermediary business manager for Deutsche Bank and also runs her own website selling eco-friendly soaps and cosmetics, said: 'I asked the barman for a small glass of red wine and as soon as I said it I could see him pursing his lips as if taking a sharp intake of breath.

'I went to the toilet leaving Alistair at the bar and when I came back the barman came up to me and said he wouldn’t serve me because he couldn’t have serving a pregnant woman alcohol on his conscience. It was outrageous and embarrassing.

'We asked why but he wouldn’t budge. We went to another bar nearby and I drank a glass of wine there instead.'

She added: 'Throughout my pregnancy I have taken good care of myself and made the best choices for my baby. I eat five portions of fruit and vegetables a day and make a fresh carrot, ginger and apple juice every morning.

'I don’t even use normal deodorant because I am concerned about using environmentally friendly and ethical products.

'I have read numerous articles about the effects of drinking alcohol when pregnant and I believe one small glass of wine once a week is not harmful to me or my baby.

'I had no alcohol during first 12 weeks of pregnancy apart from one glass of bubbly and one wine in that 12 week period and then, at most one glass a week, but not every week.

'It was usually with a nice meal out or on the odd occasion, like that Tuesday just after as long-a-walk as I could manage. The barman who refused to serve me was only in his 20s. It’s not up to him to decide what I should and shouldn’t be putting in my body

'I felt like asking whether he refuses to serve fat people pies, or whether the bar checks how much caffeine a woman has consumed that day before they serve her a cup of coffee.

'There is recent research that suggests baldness is linked to alcohol consumption, are they going to start measuring people’s hairlines before they serve them a pint?'

Ben Reynolds, area manager of Pi Bar, described the incident as an 'unfortunate misunderstanding'.

He said: 'I would first and foremost like to apologise to Ms Hampson for any upset or embarrassment caused.

'I can fully understand her grievances and can completely understand why she felt upset.

'I would like to state that we have no company policy on the serving or not serving of alcohol to pregnant people. Why would we? It’s none of our business.

'What occurred was simply the result of a junior member of staff making a mistake and getting his wires crossed.

'He is deeply sorry for upsetting Ms Hampson and assures me that he was not, as I fear she believes, making a judgment on her, but rather thought for some reason, despite his training, that licensing laws forbade the serving of alcohol to pregnant people.

'However I can understand, given the unfortunate way he appears to have said it, why Ms Hampson felt he was insinuating otherwise. I would very much like to get in contact with Ms Hampson to apologise directly.'

[Ninastar]

i don't blame him tbh

[Tom4784]

He did nothing wrong, she sounds like an overacting silly bint.

[user104658]

I wouldnt have served her either. What she does herself is none of my business but that doesn't mean I have to be a part of it... Bars almost always reserve the right to refuse service at the staffs discretion so she should just lump it.

"no evidence" that it harms? so?? Is that a good enough reason to do it? what is it with people and alcohol, that they feel the need to have a sneaky half glass no matter what? how about just... Wait? Just incase? surely it's a completely irrelevant optional indulgence, or it bloody should be.

[Samm]

good for him

[MTVN]

Not his place to refuse her service when he knows none of the details, would be a different story if she was off her face drunk but she was only having a small glass with a meal, won't do any harm

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by MTVN

Not his place to refuse her service when he knows none of the details, would be a different story if she was off her face drunk but she was only having a small glass with a meal, won't do any harm

Exactly.

[Benjamin]

Originally Posted by MTVN

Not his place to refuse her service when he knows none of the details, would be a different story if she was off her face drunk but she was only having a small glass with a meal, won't do any harm

Actually it is. If something happened to her or the baby on premises because she was drunk he would be held liable for serving her.

[MTVN]

Originally Posted by Zee

Yeah but he's a barman, he has no way of knowing if this is her only drink of the day/week/last 9 months. For all he knows this is a woman who spends all day every day drinking despite being pregnant and evidently he didn't want to be involved in any potential problems. Why would he ask her? As Caitlin said, and I have been saying, most people, especially men, aren't really clued up about pregnancy because it's not something we go through personally.

If he refused service to someone who was blind drunk and they felt "humiliated" about being denied service, people wouldn't be against the barman; but because it's a pregnant woman people are getting all uppity about it... personally I think that you shouldn't be putting anything into your body that will intoxicate you if you're carrying a baby. The barman clearly feels the same way. The pregnant woman knows more than either of us and she feels differently - and that's fine, if she wants to have her glass of wine a week in the comfort of her own home then that's fine, but having it with dinner in a restaurant is naturally going to raise eyebrows not just from the bar staff but from people in the restaurant too.

But those would all be completely baseless presumptions, I mean should barmen always assume that unless it's proven otherwise everyone they're dealing with is spending "all day every day drinking"? He would ask her because that's the reasonable thing to do instead of making incorrect judgements, surely the fact that he would know less about pregnancy is even more reason for him not to make this call (though I kinda thought it was fairly common knowledge that pregnant women can drink - and smoke - in very small doses)

Originally Posted by Ben

Actually it is. If something happened to her or the baby on premises because she was drunk he would be held liable for serving her.

Ah come on, it's a massive leap to go from allowing one small glass of wine with a meal to being criminally liable for alcohol-related problems existing in the new born baby from drunkenness.

[Benjamin]

Originally Posted by MTVN

Ah come on, it's a massive leap to go from allowing one small glass of wine with a meal to being criminally liable for alcohol-related problems existing in the new born baby from drunkenness.

Matt, we live in a day and age where a lot of people if they can find a fault with someone else's actions and claim from it they will. I fully back this man's decision, I have and will continue to do the same because I don't want any repercussions coming my way.

If she is so desperate for a glass of wine then go have one at home.

[MTVN]

Originally Posted by Ben

Matt, we live in a day and age where a lot of people if they can find a fault with someone else's actions and claim from it they will. I fully back this man's decision, I have and will continue to do the same because I don't want any repercussions coming my way.

If she is so desperate for a glass of wine then go have one at home.

Well from the sounds of it the guy has been given a 'talking to' and the bar has had to apologise so it was really the decision not to serve her which has actually got them into trouble

[thesheriff443]

Originally Posted by MTVN

Not his place to refuse her service when he knows none of the details, would be a different story if she was off her face drunk but she was only having a small glass with a meal, won't do any harm

said it all for me!

[Ammi]

Originally Posted by MTVN

Not his place to refuse her service when he knows none of the details, would be a different story if she was off her face drunk but she was only having a small glass with a meal, won't do any harm

..To be honest that was my first thoughts as well Matt, unless she was 'obviously under the influence' when she tried to order the glass of wine..or then went on to order a second/third etc then it wasn't his judgement to make on one glass of wine...but I think it's probably a case of 'damned if you do and damned if you don't' because whether it should be the case or not, people do judge on pregnant woman smoking/drinking..I remember myself once seeing a heavily pregnant young lady smoking in the street and it just looked so wrong and I didn't feel comfortable with it at all..so it does attract judgement...

..if he had served her the wine, he could have felt that other customers in the bar wouldn't feel comfortable to be there and that it would cause them to 'judge' the bar itself as somewhere they would stop going to and that might have had a bearing on his decision....and yes, he could maybe have discreetly voiced his concerns to her and said that he would serve her this one glass of wine but only one because of how he felt...but I think he was quite new and we don't all always do 'the right thing'....so he made a decision and in doing that he upset one customer, perhaps he thought a different decision could have possibly upset much more..so right or wrong, I'm not sure I want to criticise or judge him either...maybe just a lack of communication all round but I'm not sure why she felt a need to talk to the media rather than to leave it with the communications and apologies she got from the establishment owners....

[GypsyGoth]

I think he owes that unborn baby a drink!

[Ninastar]

you tell em' GG

[GypsyGoth]

[AnnieK]

As someone said it's the bars discretion. I don't personally agree with it I don't think one glass would do any harm. A shop refuses to sell me castor oil when I was pregnant but the same shop sold me 20 fags (for a friend).

[james130]

I work at a bar and think I may have done the same.

[smudgie]

One step nearer a nanny state.

If she had asked for a bottle of wine to herself then maybe he could have asked if it was wise.

[user104658]

Originally Posted by smudgie

One step nearer a nanny state.

If she had asked for a bottle of wine to herself then maybe he could have asked if it was wise.

A bar is a private establishment and his refusal to serve her has absolutely nothing to do with a "nanny state", or the "state" at all. He was not legally obliged to refuse to serve her, he CHOSE to do so, and it is perfectly within his individual rights to do that.

My thoughts on it are - if a pregnant mother wants to risk her child's health (no matter how slight the risk) then that's her business... but that absolutely does not mean that I should feel obliged to help her do so.

"No evidence that it does any harm" is not the same as "it definitely does no harm". There's also very little evidence that it doesn't do any harm. Such things are almost impossible to measure with any degree of accuracy. I personally wouldn't take the risk (if I could get pregnant) and don't particularly understand anyone who would... there are necessary risks in life and then there are things like this. No one should "need" to drink, and if they do, they have much bigger problems to address. If it's just a case of her [i]fancying[/i[ a little wine to the potential detriment of her unborn child, then that's just straight up selfish parenting. Before the poor sap has even been popped out. What else is new .

[Z]

I agree with the barman, it's general knowledge that pregnant women shouldn't be smoking or drinking. Only a pregnant woman is going to know that it's okay to have a small glass of wine every now and then (I didn't know that until I read this) and seeing as she's nine months pregnant it's not like the barman could ignore the fact she was pregnant. I would have done the exact same thing - I wouldn't want to be knowingly giving alcohol to a pregnant woman - how am I supposed to know this is her one and only drink of the week and that it's not damaging to an unborn child? I've heard of foetal alcohol syndrome, I haven't heard her wisdom that it's fine for a baby every now and then...

Basically think she's being massively hysterical over something that she must know that most people have been taught that smoking and drinking are bad for unborn children. Have your glass of wine at home. You're nearly about to give birth, I'm sure you can go another week or two without having wine in a bar/restaurant.

[AnnieK]

Originally Posted by Zee

I agree with the barman, it's general knowledge that pregnant women shouldn't be smoking or drinking. Only a pregnant woman is going to know that it's okay to have a small glass of wine every now and then (I didn't know that until I read this) and seeing as she's nine months pregnant it's not like the barman could ignore the fact she was pregnant. I would have done the exact same thing - I wouldn't want to be knowingly giving alcohol to a pregnant woman - how am I supposed to know this is her one and only drink of the week and that it's not damaging to an unborn child? I've heard of foetal alcohol syndrome, I haven't heard her wisdom that it's fine for a baby every now and then...

Basically think she's being massively hysterical over something that she must know that most people have been taught that smoking and drinking are bad for unborn children. Have your glass of wine at home. You're nearly about to give birth, I'm sure you can go another week or two without having wine in a bar/restaurant.

I do get what you're saying Zee but why is that his call to make? It is neither illegal or actually dangerous. I didn't drink whilst pregnant but that was my decision. Pregnancy should not allow others to judge you.

[Z]

Originally Posted by anniek76

I do get what you're saying Zee but why is that his call to make? It is neither illegal or actually dangerous. I didn't drink whilst pregnant but that was my decision. Pregnancy should not allow others to judge you.

Well, it's his call to make in the same way that it's his call to make if someone's had too many for their own well being - the circumstances are different but the reasoning is the same. He said he didn't want that on his conscience. I'm sure he'd rather know that he pissed off a pregnant woman than potentially caused damage to an unborn foetus. Like most others (especially men) I'm sure he thought that it was considered a no-no for women to drink when they're pregnant; I know that's what I would have done.

[MTVN]

Originally Posted by Zee

I agree with the barman, it's general knowledge that pregnant women shouldn't be smoking or drinking. Only a pregnant woman is going to know that it's okay to have a small glass of wine every now and then (I didn't know that until I read this) and seeing as she's nine months pregnant it's not like the barman could ignore the fact she was pregnant. I would have done the exact same thing - I wouldn't want to be knowingly giving alcohol to a pregnant woman - how am I supposed to know this is her one and only drink of the week and that it's not damaging to an unborn child? I've heard of foetal alcohol syndrome, I haven't heard her wisdom that it's fine for a baby every now and then...

Basically think she's being massively hysterical over something that she must know that most people have been taught that smoking and drinking are bad for unborn children. Have your glass of wine at home. You're nearly about to give birth, I'm sure you can go another week or two without having wine in a bar/restaurant.

I would say that when you've gone out for a meal that's the logical time to have your weekly glass of wine though

[user104658]

Originally Posted by MTVN

I would say that when you've gone out for a meal that's the logical time to have your weekly glass of wine though

Yes, god forbid the poor woman should have to go without her weekly glass of wine for the aeons of her pregnancy.

I swear the world is actually mental.