[Mrluvaluva]

There are not many questions that can shock a journalist into writer’s block, but Mumsnet managed that this morning by asking whether its Facebook followers owned a, wait for it, penis beaker.

We have a slightly, ahem, delicate question from the boards.
"We have a dedicated post-sex cleanup area on the bedside table. A box of tissues, a small bin, and a beaker of clean water for temporary cleaning/dunking while the bathroom is occupied by me.
Apparently our penis beaker is strange and not the done thing. "...


A message board user had posed the same question in a bid to find out whether she and her husband were alone in this most unusual of unhygienic practices.

Well it turns out the internet can be a lonely place as the overwhelming answer went something like: Stunned silence, spluttering laughter, realisation of the icky implications of such a question then an adamant ‘no’.

The author of the original post later went on to write: ’No I’m not a troll. I have only ever slept with my H [husband] and we’ve always done this! Might have started when we were teens and couldn’t make a dash to the bathroom in our parents’ houses. Luckily my drinking water is in a sports bottle!’

It’s rude to answer a question with a question, but the Mumsnet poster, who seemed confused by the fact that ‘apparently our penis beaker is strange and not the done thing’, inadvertently threw up more questions than answers.

Here are some of the most pertinent:

What happens if you want a drink in the middle of the night?
How can you be prepared to share a room with your husband which contains a penis beaker but not be in the bathroom at the same time?
Have you never heard of baby wipes?
Can you foresee any circumstances where a penis beaker could represent something of a mood killer?
What happens when, as is their wont, your kids run into your room in the morning?
How do you clean said penis beaker? Surely not in the dishwasher?
Also, who really has a post-sex clean up area?
Is romance dead?
But most of all: Seriously, a penis beaker?


Metro


Well that's a new one for me.

[arista]

why No Lid?

[Holly Christmas]

[Mrluvaluva]

Originally Posted by arista

why No Lid?

You're supposed to "dunk" Arista.

[Scarlett.]

Originally Posted by Mrluvaluva

You're supposed to "dunk" Arista.

and not biscuits.

[smudgie]

I have heard it all now.

Brings a new meaning to "dipping your wick".

[Good King Glennceslas]

The Internet can be a strange place at times

[Marc]

I think I need a grown up

[Josy]

I have no words

[Marc]

But do you have a penis beaker?

[Kazanne]

Originally Posted by smudgie

I have heard it all now.

Brings a new meaning to "dipping your wick".

[arista]

Originally Posted by Josy

I have no words

mumsnet know
from all the mums that put up with
their Older Husband who use them

[Santa's NaughtiNess]

[In the Drunk Tank]

If this lady's smart she will patent this idea right away

[Candy Annie Cane]

Originally Posted by MTVN

If this lady's smart she will patent this idea right away

[Vicky.]

Read this title multiple times as penis breaker

[ChristmasNeeve]

Originally Posted by Vicky.

Read this title multiple times as penis breaker

Same

[anne666]

Originally Posted by Vicky.

Read this title multiple times as penis breaker

Me too, but what followed was even more startling OCD?????

[mizzy25]

saw this on fb before and have to say I was pmsl even more so @ some of the answers people put.

[Kazanne]

I thought it said 'breaker' at first was gonna say I got a hammer under the bed

[lostalex]

as a man, i'm embarassed to say, but after sex i don't think i could "dunk it" my little friend shrivels back into something that is definitely not dunkable...

i'm a grower not a shower! stop judging me.

[Kizzy]

Katie Hopkins was right mumsnet are all warped

[lostalex]

seriously though, how nasty is her vagina that he needs a penis beaker after sex? it really shouldn't be getting that dirty in there.

[King Gizzard]

I have a penis sock that looks like Beaker from Muppets yes

[The Human Santapede]

What is wrong with the partner licking it clean?