[bots]

A man put out a fire on the world's longest pleasure pier by urinating on it.

Thomas Watson noticed a small fire on the deserted Southend Pier and took matters into his own hands by relieving himself over the flames.

The council thanked him for his "quick-thinking tinkling" but said it was confident its own sprinkler system would have worked, as The Sun reported.

Essex Fire Service confirmed it was called but no action was required.

Mr Watson, 22, from Houghton Regis in Bedfordshire, was visiting the 1.3 mile (2.1km) pier with his partner and daughter on Friday at about 19:30 BST, when he noticed smoke and small flames on the wooden planks.

The weather had turned and "we were literally the last people there", he told the BBC.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-essex-45018213

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Saving our historical structures

[hijaxers]

Yes with his own private hose pipe

[Saph]

[Cherie]

Parmy?

[Alf]

It wouldn't surprise me if they fined him for urinating in public.

[Beso]

Originally Posted by Cherie

Parmy?

No...im still traumatised from my pigeon experience in a pub on the seafront.

[user104658]

Originally Posted by parmnion

No...im still traumatised from my pigeon experience in a pub on the seafront.

Why would you piss on a pigeon

[kirklancaster]

Fire? I'm pissing myself

Without one moment's hesitation,
This man's quick act of micturition,
Saved this landmark for the nation.

I don't want to jeer, or boo and hiss
But is someone trying to take the piss?
For what size of blaze can be put out
By a stream of piss, I have my doubt.

Exaggeration might be the key,
and it was only a fire in name?
To be extinguished by a pee.
It can only have been just a flame.

[Beso]

Originally Posted by Toy Soldier

Why would you piss on a pigeon

Cause i couldnt hold it down to **** on it

[Cherie]

Originally Posted by kirklancaster

Fire? I'm pissing myself

Without one moment's hesitation,
This man's quick act of micturition,
Saved this landmark for the nation.

I don't want to jeer, or boo and hiss
But is someone trying to take the piss?
For what size of blaze can be put out
By a stream of piss, I have my doubt.

Exaggeration might be the key,
and it was only a fire in name?
To be extinguished by a pee.
It can only have been just a flame.

[Cherie]

He is on 5 Live now being interviewed, lol he just said first attempt it was a bit windy so he got on his knees

[kirklancaster]

Originally Posted by Cherie

He is on 5 Live now being interviewed, lol he just said first attempt it was a bit windy so he got on his knees

Roasting his exposed nuts in the heat from the raging inferno no doubt while he 'jetted' his way into the history books.

[Maru]

Originally Posted by kirklancaster

Fire? I'm pissing myself

Without one moment's hesitation,
This man's quick act of micturition,
Saved this landmark for the nation.

I don't want to jeer, or boo and hiss
But is someone trying to take the piss?
For what size of blaze can be put out
By a stream of piss, I have my doubt.

Exaggeration might be the key,
and it was only a fire in name?
To be extinguished by a pee.
It can only have been just a flame.

After slow-rapping in my head while reading this, I have to say this would go with a good beat...

[Maru]

I approve of this man's eco-friendly approach

[user104658]

Originally Posted by parmnion

Cause i couldnt hold it down to **** on it

[kirklancaster]

Originally Posted by Maru

After slow-rapping in my head while reading this, I have to say this would go with a good beat...

I'm working on it, Maru.