[Stu]

FRIDAY, 27TH NOVEMBER, 2009
CHANNEL 4 HEADQUATERS
SOMEWHERE IN ENGLAND I CAN'T BE BOTHERED GOOGLING
2200 HOURS



? : Are we all satisfied?

Executive : Satisfied with what?

? : Satisfied with the deal!

Executive : Yes, yes.

? : So you will sell your shares?

Executive : Of course.

? : What do you mean of course, is Channel 4 even a public company?

Executive : I'm not sure, but for the sake of the narrative, let's assume it is. Does the pope **** in the woods?

? : What?

Executive : Nothing.

? : And the creative control?

Executive : All yours, of course.

? : Then you may have your money. Me? I'm driven by more things than money.

Executive : Such as?

? : Down on your knees.

Executive : Now? Here?

? : I don't see the complications that you do, obviously. I called a meeting between the network executive and my humble self for no apparent reason on a weekend night at ten.

Executive : I see. Well, let me use the bathroom first.

? : As you wish. Just one more thing...

Executive : Yes?

? : From now on, you are my minion, and so are your co-workers.

Minion : Understood. Just hand me the money.

? : Come here, you tiger. Channel Four is mine now.

Minion : Just before we start, uh...

? : ...first time?

Minion : Not at all!

? : Not at all?

Minion : No, it's just, you know, your creative commitments start with Celebrity Big Brother, in January.

? : Celebrity Big Brother? Whats that then?



*SCENE FADES OUT, SCENES OF FORBIDDEN LUST OCCUR AS HIGH UP IN CHANNEL FOUR TOWERS, A WINDOW GETS QUIET FOGGY.*