[Z]

My uncle left my auntie for a younger woman, had four kids with the younger woman and then 10 years later it finally ended when he found out she was cheating on him. He's a rich man, she essentially had four insurance policies with him, by all accounts she's not much of a mum - nannies this and babysitters that. He abandoned my cousins (then aged 14 and 12) and wasn't there for them, would just deposit money in their bank accounts every so often and fight with their mum. Now that his fancy piece has left him he's popping back up in their lives.

The lesson I take from that is that your dad has fallen for someone who is exciting and new - she is part of his healing process in getting over the break up with your mum; this new woman can more or less do what she wants to your dad and his life because he's just wanting to put the past behind him at the cost of his future. I don't know why your sister has chosen to live with him instead of your mum; I think she's made a poor choice and she ought to come home and leave them to it - the three of you will always be your dad's little girls no matter how old you are and, sadly, this woman is going to do her absolute best to isolate him from everyone. One day he'll wake up and realise what she's done and he'll stand up for himself, but that has to come from him - you trying to get him to wake up and smell the coffee is just going to make him turn on you and play into her game, which you already know. By all means tell him that you're worried for your sister, with her issues, and that you think it's important that she's surrounded by people as much as possible - that's about the most you can hint to him that you think he needs to get away from his monster bride, anything else will just play into her victim card.

One thing you could try doing is being impossibly nice to his wife. Give her absolutely no reason to justifiably bitch about you and cut you out. Insist on talking to her in front of your dad and making a huge show of trying to speak to her - that forces her to either be nice to you or openly be a bitch to you in front of your dad; and he will definitely notice that she's not being nice to his kids, it'll be mentally logged and when he does eventually stand up for himself, that'll be one of the main points of contention. He has three daughters, he doesn't need his new partner trying to cut them out of his life - his marriage ended, he still has a family though. Just be glad that you have both your sisters and that whatever you're feeling and thinking, they will be too. Lots of love to you Caitlin xxxxxxxx