[Ammi]

Originally Posted by Toy Soldier

So its the "when Harry met Sally" question then (I think it's Harry that insists men and women can't be just friends). I'm not convinced though - I don't think "fancying" someone is a huge deal and it's a million miles from having something actually happen beyond just that... I also tend to think that anyone who claims that during a long term relationship they have NEVER even vaguely fancied anyone else is probably not being entirely honest .

I've been thinking a lot lately, about life, about how really it's all about connections, about how I don't have as many as I'd probably like at this point and about some really good connections that I've had in the past and let go of carelessly. I think a lot of the world is pretty lonely, I guess, and that ironically part of the cause of that is insecurity and jealousy. I've even seen plenty of people get insecure about their partners having deep connections with old friends of the same sex. Jealous of time spent with them, etc. Which I understand when people have generally busy lives but I dunno. Just wish I properly "knew" more people beyond superficial niceties.

..that to me really is the 'meaning of life', the connections that we make and the lives we touch/those who touch ours etc....because when we're gone, that's really (for me) all there is for our time here on earth....(just getting a bit deep and thought-filled as you seem to have..)...I recall when my dad died and I saw him and thinking that this wasn't my dad, this was an 'empty person'..so where was his spirit, where was that thing that made him, him..that sparkle/that energy..I mean it had to be somewhere because it wasn't a body that made him who he was...anyways..(because I haven't got much time, sorry/these are just quick thoughts..)...at his funeral, there were so many people who came, who he had 'connected with' in his life and I hadn't realised that those connections were so meaningful....and some from so long ago and yet those people felt that they wanted to spend some of their time coming to show him respect that day....that to me was his life, the meaning of it all and that he was still there in a way because he was there in the people he had connected to and in their hearts and in what he had meant to them...so yeah, I believe connections that we make are the meaning of our lives...for me anyway...(because I know meaning is different for everyone..)...


...you've had connections in the past, you say and have let go of them (carelessly..)...but maybe they were meant to be let go of and just 'passing through' a part of your life but not meant to stay..?.../connections also naturally change and evolve as well but I think that we often lose more than we keep...I don't have lots and lots of friends/people I'm close to and connect with but the ones I do have are all very long term friends..but some of those connections have changed slightly in that we can't always see each other so much etc and our lives often divert off on different roads but we still connect at that 'meeting point' whenever we're able to....the 'jealousy/insecurity' of any friendships, I have..is not really something that I've experienced from my partner but that's the trust thing as well, isn't it and a full circle around to 'dating married people'....if it is just close friendships those are people's own individual insecurities and lacking in confidences and maybe based on life experiences as well....