[Shaun]

If we may, can we start now? I started running a bath a while ago. Oops.


LADIES AND GENTLEGAYS IT'S STU.

[MeMyselfAndI]

Whats wrong with staceyx she is

[CaraRawr]

i'm here :')

[Braden]

hi bbz

[Stu]

*gives a big gay wave when waiting for the studio audience to pour in*

[Twilight]

Originally Posted by MeMyselfandI

Whats wrong with staceyx she is

I though i was only gonna use this once but here goes again

[Shaun]

Hello Stuart.

I suspect I can't call you that for contractual reasons?

What do you have for us today?

[Stu]

Okay first on the elite hate list tonight is a species known collectively by the street term Topman Twatbags.

Oh don't give me that look. You know damn well what I am on about. I am on about the sentient, wallet equipped army of young adults who buy all their clothes from this grotesque bastion of bad style. Not just the odd pair of jeans and a bracelet. I am talking about the devout cock suckers of the Topman empire who for the past few years have been clogging up our streets with the following visual catastrophes :

Orange crucifixes.
Neon T-Shirts.
Dur hur funny slogans.
Overdone retro designs.
Whacky 'randomness'.
Tight neon pants.
Socks with star constellations.
Stupid scarf things that belong on dogs.
Pseudo 'classy' wear.
Things that Nadine Coyle would barely fit into.

Remember Scampi? Some of you young members wont, be he was our very own Topman Twatbag. One of the infected. He once even had an avatar of himself holding a Topman sign. What a douche. A virus who would willingly shill his oversized shades, pink T-Shirt's and Fruictis Maxi Megalomanic Unbreakable Hold gel right onto your kids.

Don't allow this to happen. Strangle these creatures with the very scarve neck things they have paid eighty four pounds for. The cunts.

Topman Twatbags. Show them the trap door.

[Smithy]

Did you have that preprepared? ^

[Z]

LOL agreed Stu!!

[Stu]

Originally Posted by Smithy

Did you have that preprepared? ^

I started writting it just a wee bit before the show started.

[CaraRawr]

YES. i thought i was the only one.

the worst are the ones who wear exactly the same polo shirt everyday in different colours :/

[\PJ/]

LOL Stu!

[Shaun]

How pretty!

Now. I am in total agreement...I occasionally go into Topman/New Look for a t-shirt or something, and am blinded by neon necklaces.

[Smithy]

Originally Posted by Judas Iscariot

I started writting it just a wee bit before the show started.

Oh, fair enough

[Shaun]

Jesus, I just noticed the price of those belts.

DO WE HAVE ANY TOPMAN TWATBAGS IN THE HOUSE TO DEFEND THIS?

[Braden]

I shop at Topman. But I am slowly seeing a dislike to it,as I can find no clothes at this moment

[Stu]

Originally Posted by Shaun

Jesus, I just noticed the price of those belts.

DO WE HAVE ANY TOPMAN TWATBAGS IN THE HOUSE TO DEFEND THIS?

They are too busy having an alcopopaholic, 3OH!3 blaring house party.

[\PJ/]

get it in1!!!!!!!! get it the **** in!!!!1111!!!1

[Smithy]

I dont think we have a topman

[Shaun]

Point noted, Stu.

In they're tossed.

Now - item 2 please.

[Stu]

Okay, next up tonight is GOD.



Look at him. The unkempt prick. Think of all the things he is guilty of. Don't think of sex, drugs and rock n' roll. Remember, those things are copyrighted to Satan. These are the things God is against. What has God given us?

God has given us Songs Of Praise, old people who still feel relevant, the anti abortion brigade, Miley Cyrus, Billy Ray Cyrus, the entire Fox News team, Nickelback and Creed.

God has also given LeatherTrumpet a platform. A stage to air his world views. Nuff said.

You know what to do ...

[Shaun]

I'll stick to the images thank you, otherwise I'm totally obsolete.

Controversial.

Any God-lovers in the house?

[Smithy]

Im not going against god

For item 3 you should go for womens right

[Twilight]

Get him in there.