[WOMBAI]

Originally Posted by InOne

icecakes, can you explain to me why women often remain in abusive relationships? Is it love or what?

Several reasons - sometimes they are idiots who like violent, aggressive men, sometimes they are simply too scared, but for the most part it is economics - many stay at home mums with young children would find it very hard to cope financially - which is why young women today, who have any sense at all, should acquire a good education and skills - and never make themselves totally dependent on a man - as relationships go wrong all the time - noone knows what the future holds! Skill up girls - and you will never have to tolerate such behaviour!

[InOne]

Originally Posted by WOMBAI

Several reasons - sometimes they are idiots who like violent, aggressive men, sometimes they are simply too scared, but for the most part it is economics - many stay at home mums with young children would find it very hard to cope financially - which is why young women today, who have any sense at all, should acquire a good education and skills - and never make themselves totally dependent on a man - as relationships go wrong all the time - noone knows what the future holds! Skill up girls - and you will never have to tolerate such behaviour!

So I guess you're not too fond of this underclass of girls who's only aim in life is to get pregnant, get the house and benefits ect. Sadly it's happening more often these days. I know what you mean about women who like 'The bad boy', seems a good idea at the time for a bit of fun, then they end up left alone with 3 kids who'll never know their dad.

[Shasown]

Originally Posted by InOne

icecakes, can you explain to me why women often remain in abusive relationships? Is it love or what?

Its not only women who are abused in domestic relationships, and often men stay in an abusive relationship just like women do.

[icecakes]

Originally Posted by InOne

So emotional manipulation basically? But sometimes it gets to a point where they don't even pretend to be sorry, they just do it and carry on as normal. They must've completely broken the women down by then. But there is always somewhere to go, especially if kids are involved.

there is places ,for battered women,but the kids usually love him, they dont understand,its there home, with there things,friends,school etc,many women will stick it out for the kids sake.

[InOne]

Originally Posted by Shasown

Its not only women who are abused in domestic relationships, and often men stay in an abusive relationship just like women do.

Yeah I know, a lot of it is unreported I guess. I'd say men might be quite embarrassed if you get me even though it might happen a lot, there is still stigma for men in that department. I know full well women can be just as abusive and volitile.

[InOne]

Originally Posted by icecakes

there is places ,for battered women,but the kids usually love him, they dont understand,its there home, with there things,friends,school etc,many women will stick it out for the kids sake.

Yes but surely once the kids reach a certain age they gonna realise what type of man their father is? And they will ask questions and often suffer abuse themselves.

[WOMBAI]

Originally Posted by InOne

So I guess you're not too fond of this underclass of girls who's only aim in life is to get pregnant, get the house and benefits ect. Sadly it's happening more often these days. I know what you mean about women who like 'The bad boy', seems a good idea at the time for a bit of fun, then they end up left alone with 3 kids who'll never know their dad.

I don't think 'underclass' is the right word - as often such girls have come from very disadvantaged backgrounds through no choice of their own - but I do think that girls should have learned by now that education is the key to power as well as a comfortable life - and we all get access to education in Britain! They should rely on themselves and not on a man! If you rely on someone else - you remain vulnerable, fact of life!

And let's not forget that for every irresponsible young mother - there is an irresponsible father somewhere - and both should be judged accordingly! One is no better than the other!

[Smithy]

Wombai why do you keep deleting your posts?

[InOne]

Originally Posted by WOMBAI

I don't think 'underclass' is the right word - as often such girls have come from very disadvantaged backgrounds through no choice of their own - but I do think that girls should have learned by now that education is the key to power as well as a comfortable life - and we all get access to education in Britain! They should rely on themselves and not on a man! If you rely on someone else - you remain vulnerable, fact of life!

And let's not forget that for every irresponisble young mother - there is an irresponsble father somewhere - and both should be judged accordingly! One is no better than the other!

That Underclass does exist though, not saying it's just full of young mothers lol

Yeah obviously they are both as bad as eachother, I'm not one who is bothered about the nuclear family, but kids having kids for the sake of having kids will get this country nowhere. And don't see how it can be solved at the moment

[icecakes]

Originally Posted by InOne

Yes but surely once the kids reach a certain age they gonna realise what type of man their father is? And they will ask questions and often suffer abuse themselves.

they dont usually abuse the kids,and what he does to the women ,is all kept secret, because deep down they are cowards.

[InOne]

Originally Posted by icecakes

they dont usually abuse the kids,and what he does to the women ,is all kept secret, because deep down they are cowards.

They do usually abuse the kids, that is the thing. And you think the kids wouldn't notice constant arguing and violence? That is abuse in itself.

[Shasown]

Fear of failure of the relationship, moving on, the unknown, hope that the person they fell in love with will resurface, hope they can change the person or the person will change themselves. Its very rarely about love,

Love is just the excuse to avoid moving out and on.

[icecakes]

Originally Posted by InOne

They do usually abuse the kids, that is the thing. And you think the kids wouldn't notice constant arguing and violence? That is abuse in itself.

they usually do it in secret,anyway, every battered wife should be sent round a big bouncer to sort him out,[break his legs maybe]

[Shasown]

Originally Posted by Smithy

Wombai why do you keep deleting your posts?

Fear of the unknown, not wanting to move on past 10,000.

Its such a lovely number.

[InOne]

Originally Posted by Shasown

Fear of failure of the relationship, moving on, the unknown, hope that the person they fell in love with will resurface, hope they can change the person or the person will change themselves. Its very rarely about love,

Love is just the excuse to avoid moving out and on.

Yeah that is true. If a relationship becomes like than then obviously the love (if any) was lost a long time ago.

[Shasown]

Originally Posted by icecakes

they usually do it in secret,anyway, every battered wife should be sent round a big bouncer to sort him out,[break his legs maybe]

What about battered husbands, what should they have to sort out the wife?

[InOne]

Originally Posted by icecakes

they usually do it in secret,anyway, every battered wife should be sent round a big bouncer to sort him out,[break his legs maybe]

Hmmm, bit of an odd way to solve it, do you have a thing for bouncers?

[Ninastar]

Originally Posted by Captain.Remy

great deep explanation from our friend Nina. Always helpful.

(I'm kidding babe, I like you)

thanks :')

[icecakes]

Originally Posted by Shasown

Fear of failure of the relationship, moving on, the unknown, hope that the person they fell in love with will resurface, hope they can change the person or the person will change themselves. Its very rarely about love,

Love is just the excuse to avoid moving out and on.

Your so good at expressing things.

[Shasown]

Originally Posted by icecakes

Your so good at expressing things.

Been there with this particular subject, so I have a little inside knowledge.

[icecakes]

Originally Posted by shasown

what about battered husbands, what should they have to sort out the wife?

chuff me dizzy, sounds capable

[Shasown]

Originally Posted by icecakes

chuff me dizzy, sounds capable

Violence in this sort of case solves nothing. Only resentment and further violence.

Maybe Wombai and Chuff should be sent round to the abusive husbands who then have to listen to them for a few days.

[WOMBAI]

Seems to me there are some very dippy girls on this forum whose heads are full on nothing but romance, even those of strangers on a tv show, and are very likely candidates for finding themselves in such an undesirable position! Everything is pink and fluffy in their world - not realistic! We need to educate some girls in life skills!

[WOMBAI]

Originally Posted by Shasown

Violence in this sort of case solves nothing. Only resentment and further violence.

Maybe Wombai and Chuff should be sent round to the abusive husbands who then have to listen to them for a few days.

Stating the obvious doesn't always make you popular! I can live with that!

[Shasown]

Originally Posted by WOMBAI

Seems to me there are some very dippy girls on this forum whose heads are full on nothing but romance, even those of strangers on a tv show, and are very likely candidates for finding themselves in such an undesirable position! Everything is pink and fluffy in their world - not realistic! We need to educate some girls in life skills!

Good idea.

They say the way to a mans heart is through the stomach.







A six inch bread knife is more than adequate if you angle it correctly.(Bet you thought I meant cookery lessons).