Home Menu

Site Navigation


Notices

Chat and Games Looking for forum games, and completely off topic banter - this is your place! (includes Virtual Big Brother type forum games)

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 14-03-2012, 11:07 AM #26
Benjamin's Avatar
Benjamin Benjamin is offline
Like a fine whiskey
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Wales
Posts: 66,614

Favourites (more):
BB2024: Sarah
CBB2024: Marisha Wallace


Benjamin Benjamin is offline
Like a fine whiskey
Benjamin's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Wales
Posts: 66,614

Favourites (more):
BB2024: Sarah
CBB2024: Marisha Wallace


Default

What do you call a woman with a tile on her head?

Spoiler:

Ruth


What do you call a man with no arms and legs in water?

Spoiler:

Bob
__________________

It's never too late to be who you once could have been...

Spoiler:



Quote:
Originally Posted by MTVN

Anyway there's an explanation and I don't really appreciate your tone. It's very aggressive so I'm going to close this, sorry for killing the internet mate
Quote:
Originally Posted by Crimson Dynamo View Post
Here iv made a wee paper plane


Benjamin is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 14-03-2012, 11:08 AM #27
Jessica. Jessica. is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Portugal
Posts: 24,821


Jessica. Jessica. is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Portugal
Posts: 24,821


Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by ukturtle View Post
What do you call a man with no arms and legs in water?

Spoiler:

Bob
__________________
Jessica. is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 14-03-2012, 11:09 AM #28
Niamh.'s Avatar
Niamh. Niamh. is offline
I Love my brick
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Ireland-The peoples Republic of Cork!
Posts: 148,511

Favourites (more):
BB19: Cian
IAC2018: Rita Simons


Niamh. Niamh. is offline
I Love my brick
Niamh.'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Ireland-The peoples Republic of Cork!
Posts: 148,511

Favourites (more):
BB19: Cian
IAC2018: Rita Simons


Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Josy View Post
My dad used to tell me lots of jokes like that when I was a kid

What do you call a man with dirt on his head?
Spoiler:

Pete

What do you call a man with a spade on his head?
Spoiler:

Doug

What do you call a man with a toilet on his head?
Spoiler:

Lou

What do you call a man with leaves on his head?
Spoiler:

Russel

What do you call a woman with a radiator on her head?
Spoiler:

Anita

What do you call a man with a scratch on his face?
Spoiler:

Claude


I can't remember any more atm.
What do you call a man with no spade on his head?

Spoiler:

Douglas
__________________

Spoiler:

Quote:
Originally Posted by GiRTh View Post
You compare Jim Davidson to Nelson Mandela?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jesus. View Post
I know, how stupid? He's more like Gandhi.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Isaiah 7:14 View Post



Katie Hopkins reveals epilepsy made her suicidal - and says she identifies as a MAN
Quote:
Originally Posted by Livia View Post
Just because she is a giant cock, doesn't make her a man.
Niamh. is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 14-03-2012, 11:15 AM #29
Ammi's Avatar
Ammi Ammi is offline
Quand il pleut, il pleut
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 76,305


Ammi Ammi is offline
Quand il pleut, il pleut
Ammi's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 76,305


Default

What do you call a man with a car on his head.....jack
..actually I'd call him ****ed
Ammi is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 14-03-2012, 11:16 AM #30
Niamh.'s Avatar
Niamh. Niamh. is offline
I Love my brick
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Ireland-The peoples Republic of Cork!
Posts: 148,511

Favourites (more):
BB19: Cian
IAC2018: Rita Simons


Niamh. Niamh. is offline
I Love my brick
Niamh.'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Ireland-The peoples Republic of Cork!
Posts: 148,511

Favourites (more):
BB19: Cian
IAC2018: Rita Simons


Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ammi View Post
What do you call a man with a car on his head.....jack
..actually I'd call him ****ed
__________________

Spoiler:

Quote:
Originally Posted by GiRTh View Post
You compare Jim Davidson to Nelson Mandela?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jesus. View Post
I know, how stupid? He's more like Gandhi.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Isaiah 7:14 View Post



Katie Hopkins reveals epilepsy made her suicidal - and says she identifies as a MAN
Quote:
Originally Posted by Livia View Post
Just because she is a giant cock, doesn't make her a man.
Niamh. is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 14-03-2012, 11:19 AM #31
Ammi's Avatar
Ammi Ammi is offline
Quand il pleut, il pleut
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 76,305


Ammi Ammi is offline
Quand il pleut, il pleut
Ammi's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 76,305


Default

What do you call a woman with Holly on her head...Carol
..you can tell I'm amused for hours on end at work
Ammi is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 14-03-2012, 11:24 AM #32
Fetch The Bolt Cutters's Avatar
Fetch The Bolt Cutters Fetch The Bolt Cutters is offline
-
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 34,862


Fetch The Bolt Cutters Fetch The Bolt Cutters is offline
-
Fetch The Bolt Cutters's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 34,862


Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Shaun View Post
What did Zee say to a black guy?

"I hate you because of your skin colour".
Fetch The Bolt Cutters is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 14-03-2012, 11:27 AM #33
Shaun's Avatar
Shaun Shaun is offline
Ż\_(ツ)_/Ż
 
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 106,491

Favourites (more):
CBB2025: Donna Preston
BB2024: Ali


Shaun Shaun is offline
Ż\_(ツ)_/Ż
Shaun's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 106,491

Favourites (more):
CBB2025: Donna Preston
BB2024: Ali


Default

What do you call this thread and all of its jokes apart from Greg's and Shaun's?

Shit.
__________________
Spoiler:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Saph View Post
You're giving me a million reasons about a million reasons

Shaun is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 14-03-2012, 11:31 AM #34
Ammi's Avatar
Ammi Ammi is offline
Quand il pleut, il pleut
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 76,305


Ammi Ammi is offline
Quand il pleut, il pleut
Ammi's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 76,305


Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Shaun View Post
What do you call this thread and all of its jokes apart from Greg's and Shaun's?

Shit.
..no..I don't get that one
Ammi is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 14-03-2012, 12:01 PM #35
Fetch The Bolt Cutters's Avatar
Fetch The Bolt Cutters Fetch The Bolt Cutters is offline
-
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 34,862


Fetch The Bolt Cutters Fetch The Bolt Cutters is offline
-
Fetch The Bolt Cutters's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 34,862


Default

what do you call ammi

Spoiler:

ammi
Fetch The Bolt Cutters is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 14-03-2012, 12:04 PM #36
Ammi's Avatar
Ammi Ammi is offline
Quand il pleut, il pleut
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 76,305


Ammi Ammi is offline
Quand il pleut, il pleut
Ammi's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 76,305


Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Scott View Post
what do you call ammi

Spoiler:

ammi
..see...why can't Shaun's be as good as that
..you have a gift Scott
Ammi is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 14-03-2012, 12:05 PM #37
Benjamin's Avatar
Benjamin Benjamin is offline
Like a fine whiskey
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Wales
Posts: 66,614

Favourites (more):
BB2024: Sarah
CBB2024: Marisha Wallace


Benjamin Benjamin is offline
Like a fine whiskey
Benjamin's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Wales
Posts: 66,614

Favourites (more):
BB2024: Sarah
CBB2024: Marisha Wallace


Default

Why was six scared of seven?

Spoiler:

Because Scott molested all the men
__________________

It's never too late to be who you once could have been...

Spoiler:



Quote:
Originally Posted by MTVN

Anyway there's an explanation and I don't really appreciate your tone. It's very aggressive so I'm going to close this, sorry for killing the internet mate
Quote:
Originally Posted by Crimson Dynamo View Post
Here iv made a wee paper plane


Benjamin is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 14-03-2012, 12:07 PM #38
Black Dagger's Avatar
Black Dagger Black Dagger is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Stockport, England
Posts: 44,991

Favourites (more):
BB2024: Ali
CBB2024: Louis Walsh


Black Dagger Black Dagger is offline
Senior Member
Black Dagger's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Stockport, England
Posts: 44,991

Favourites (more):
BB2024: Ali
CBB2024: Louis Walsh


Default

I no laugh yet.

bad amazing jokes thread is bad.
Black Dagger is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 14-03-2012, 12:14 PM #39
Benjamin's Avatar
Benjamin Benjamin is offline
Like a fine whiskey
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Wales
Posts: 66,614

Favourites (more):
BB2024: Sarah
CBB2024: Marisha Wallace


Benjamin Benjamin is offline
Like a fine whiskey
Benjamin's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Wales
Posts: 66,614

Favourites (more):
BB2024: Sarah
CBB2024: Marisha Wallace


Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Black Dagger View Post
I no laugh yet.

bad amazing jokes thread is bad.
That's because you are emotionally dead.
__________________

It's never too late to be who you once could have been...

Spoiler:



Quote:
Originally Posted by MTVN

Anyway there's an explanation and I don't really appreciate your tone. It's very aggressive so I'm going to close this, sorry for killing the internet mate
Quote:
Originally Posted by Crimson Dynamo View Post
Here iv made a wee paper plane


Benjamin is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 14-03-2012, 12:16 PM #40
Jessica. Jessica. is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Portugal
Posts: 24,821


Jessica. Jessica. is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Portugal
Posts: 24,821


Default

I actually don't get the first joke.. o.o
__________________
Jessica. is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 14-03-2012, 12:21 PM #41
Black Dagger's Avatar
Black Dagger Black Dagger is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Stockport, England
Posts: 44,991

Favourites (more):
BB2024: Ali
CBB2024: Louis Walsh


Black Dagger Black Dagger is offline
Senior Member
Black Dagger's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Stockport, England
Posts: 44,991

Favourites (more):
BB2024: Ali
CBB2024: Louis Walsh


Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by ukturtle View Post
That's because you are emotionally dead.
You're actually right
Black Dagger is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 19-03-2012, 11:06 AM #42
Incensed's Avatar
Incensed Incensed is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 1,599

Favourites (more):
BB12: Mark
UBB: Brian
Incensed Incensed is offline
Senior Member
Incensed's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 1,599

Favourites (more):
BB12: Mark
UBB: Brian
Default

News - Torres scores and lifts his shirt to reveal a 'Save the Chilean Miners' T-Shirt.
Incensed is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 16-05-2013, 04:08 PM #43
Niamh.'s Avatar
Niamh. Niamh. is offline
I Love my brick
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Ireland-The peoples Republic of Cork!
Posts: 148,511

Favourites (more):
BB19: Cian
IAC2018: Rita Simons


Niamh. Niamh. is offline
I Love my brick
Niamh.'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Ireland-The peoples Republic of Cork!
Posts: 148,511

Favourites (more):
BB19: Cian
IAC2018: Rita Simons


Default

What's a specimen?

Spoiler:

An Italian astronaut
__________________

Spoiler:

Quote:
Originally Posted by GiRTh View Post
You compare Jim Davidson to Nelson Mandela?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jesus. View Post
I know, how stupid? He's more like Gandhi.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Isaiah 7:14 View Post



Katie Hopkins reveals epilepsy made her suicidal - and says she identifies as a MAN
Quote:
Originally Posted by Livia View Post
Just because she is a giant cock, doesn't make her a man.
Niamh. is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 16-05-2013, 04:10 PM #44
Ryan57 Ryan57 is offline
-
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 6,675
Ryan57 Ryan57 is offline
-
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 6,675
Default

Where did Saddam Hussain keep his CDs?

Spoiler:

In a Raq (best said in person)
Ryan57 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 16-05-2013, 04:10 PM #45
King Gizzard's Avatar
King Gizzard King Gizzard is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 85,682


King Gizzard King Gizzard is offline
Senior Member
King Gizzard's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 85,682


Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nathan View Post
What did the Iranian president say when he didn't like his food?

Ah my dinner bad.
i just laughed at this again
King Gizzard is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 16-05-2013, 04:11 PM #46
Niamh.'s Avatar
Niamh. Niamh. is offline
I Love my brick
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Ireland-The peoples Republic of Cork!
Posts: 148,511

Favourites (more):
BB19: Cian
IAC2018: Rita Simons


Niamh. Niamh. is offline
I Love my brick
Niamh.'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Ireland-The peoples Republic of Cork!
Posts: 148,511

Favourites (more):
BB19: Cian
IAC2018: Rita Simons


Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nathan View Post
i just laughed at this again
__________________

Spoiler:

Quote:
Originally Posted by GiRTh View Post
You compare Jim Davidson to Nelson Mandela?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jesus. View Post
I know, how stupid? He's more like Gandhi.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Isaiah 7:14 View Post



Katie Hopkins reveals epilepsy made her suicidal - and says she identifies as a MAN
Quote:
Originally Posted by Livia View Post
Just because she is a giant cock, doesn't make her a man.
Niamh. is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 16-05-2013, 04:14 PM #47
Marsh. Marsh. is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 79,976


Marsh. Marsh. is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 79,976


Default

What is brown and has holes in it?

Spoiler:

Swiss Sh!t
Marsh. is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 16-05-2013, 04:16 PM #48
Marc's Avatar
Marc Marc is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 81,305

Favourites:
BBUSA17: John


Marc Marc is offline
Senior Member
Marc's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 81,305

Favourites:
BBUSA17: John


Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Shaun View Post
What did Zee say to a black guy?

"I hate you because of your skin colour".
****ing hell
Marc is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 16-05-2013, 04:19 PM #49
Z's Avatar
Z Z is offline
Z
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 23,560


Z Z is offline
Z
Z's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 23,560


Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Niamh. View Post
What's a specimen?

Spoiler:

An Italian astronaut
I'm properly crying with laughter at this
Z is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 16-05-2013, 04:21 PM #50
Alf's Avatar
Alf Alf is offline
Sod orf
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Wapping
Posts: 36,215


Alf Alf is offline
Sod orf
Alf's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Wapping
Posts: 36,215


Default

What do you call a Russian with a bottle of Lemonade?

Spoiler:

Whodyanick yourpopov

Last edited by Alf; 16-05-2013 at 04:22 PM.
Alf is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Reply

Bookmark/share this topic

Tags
amazing, jokes


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 02:22 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2025, vBulletin Solutions Inc.
User Alert System provided by Advanced User Tagging (Pro) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2025 DragonByte Technologies Ltd.
 

About Us ThisisBigBrother.com

"Big Brother and UK Television Forum. Est. 2001"

 

© 2023
no new posts