[lily.]

Originally Posted by Snow Angel

I knew there was a reason I love you..Couldn't have put it better myself!

However as this is a tutor there really shouldn't be anything personal affecting how you interact, have you ever given them cause to have such a negative perception of you lily?

No. I think she just doesn't like my personality, if that makes sense. She has been this way from day one.

[Jessica.]

It only bothers me if they act on it. One time I was sent to the office to get something for a teacher in school and I saw my Home Ec teacher in the hall when I was going down the stairs, she is in her 60's and has always been so grumpy, well I decided to greet her nicely, since I was in a good mood and she just stood and glared at me, but it made me laugh and I tried to continue without causing trouble.

Anyway about an hour later I got called out of another class by my Irish teacher saying that the Home Ec teacher was thinking of pressing charges for intimidation because I was sneering at her.. I know I didn't intimidate her and I lost all respect for her that day, when people act like that, spreading lies about someone when they are supposed to be a professional it really grinds my gears.

There are and have been plenty people who don't like me for no reason but they don't try to vocalise it apart from letting me know and I am fine with that, it doesn't bother me, if they don't like me then they are not worth making an effort for.

[Natalie.]

Doesn't bother me, I don't need people to like me

[Kazanne]

Originally Posted by Merrissey

Doesn't bother me, I don't need people to like me

[Natalie.]

Originally Posted by TinselBalls

[AnnieK]

Its kind of the other way round for me - a lot of people think I don't like them but its not that, I do weigh people up a lot and am pretty quiet for a long time and then once I have decided that they're all right I come out of my shell. I never realised until a couple of girls at work said I was awful when they first started work here and they thought I was hard work and a bit stuck up but then all of a sudden I'm the office idiot and the person everyone comes to if they need stuff sorting....it gave me a bit of a complex but I find it really hard to be all nicey nicey to people before I know them

[Vanessa]

It used to, but now i just don't care. I'm always polite to everyone, weather they like me or not. I treat everyone the same.

[Apple202]

no cos i do it to other people so dc

[Apple202]

well actually i dont really i just give people bad vibes if i dont think they like me even if i dont know for sure

[Marsh.]

In general no, it depends who it is.

I would have a huge problem if a tutor was being funny with me though. They are there to teach you, not make you uncomfortable. If it's so bad then try and discuss it with them or if they're being deliberately hostile then report them.

You're there for education, not to be treated like crap.

[Brother Leon]

In school days yeah, but these days I don't give a ****. My circle of friends is tiny anyway and I wouldn't want it any other way.

[fingers]

Originally Posted by Father Simpmas

In school days yeah, but these days I don't give a ****. My circle of friends is tiny anyway and I wouldn't want it any other way.

That Snowman is one fat assed Bastid!

[Shaun]

say crack again

[MTVN]

Yea majorly, one of my weaknesses that I hate to be disliked and feel obliged to always try and change that persons opinion

[Marsh.]

Originally Posted by King Moonracer

Yea majorly, one of my weaknesses that I hate to be disliked and feel obliged to always try and change that persons opinion

I thoroughly detest you.

[King Gizzard]

King Moonracer the prick

[Z]

Originally Posted by Yukon Cornelius

King Moonracer the prick

Why is everyone being so funny recently, I swear I've burst into laughter at least a dozen times in the last 24 hours because of TiBB

[Ammi]

Originally Posted by JingleBitch

.. someone doesn't like you, even though you've given them no reason to dislike you and you're nothing but nice to them?

One of my tutors is like this, and I don't know why it irks me, but it really does..

I feel like it's unjustified, and wouldn't mind if she had a good reason for it, but I just want to stunt up to her and ask her what her effing problem is.. which of course I can't, or that would just validate her dislike for me..

I want to not care, and I don't know if it's because I have to spend time with her a few days a week, or because she's in a position of seniority, but I struggle to not care..

..if it was me, I would just ask her and say if there's a problem..not in a confrontational/hostile way because as you said, that would just validate how she is toward you and she would feel justified for being how she is/try to put it back on you..but as she doesn't have a reason/there doesn't seem any reason to it, then it really is an issue she has, not you..and by ignoring it, then it's making it your problem because it's bothering you, so give it back to her where it belongs as she's the one who has created it...also because it could become your problem in a much more important and serious way by having an effect on your course/studies/distracting etc if you just ignore it...just tell her you sense a hostility and then she has to somehow respond to that..?..


...EDIT:..also, if it was one of your children..(I think you're a mum..?...)...you wouldn't ignore it if one of their teachers seemed hostile toward them...obviously because it isn't a very good way/appropriate way for a teacher to behave but also because you would be concerned about the effect it could have on their school work...this really is no different..doing this course is a big thing to you/important to you so don't allow any silliness from her spoil it for you...ask her about it and not only let her know how aware you are of it but make her look at her own actions and justify them...she's entitled to not like you and doesn't have to have a reason but as your tutor/mentor, she isn't entitled to openly express it or in any way make you feel uncomfortable or undermine you...

[lily.]

Originally Posted by Ammi

..if it was me, I would just ask her and say if there's a problem..not in a confrontational/hostile way because as you said, that would just validate how she is toward you and she would feel justified for being how she is/try to put it back on you..but as she doesn't have a reason/there doesn't seem any reason to it, then it really is an issue she has, not you..and by ignoring it, then it's making it your problem because it's bothering you, so give it back to her where it belongs as she's the one who has created it...also because it could become your problem in a much more important and serious way by having an effect on your course/studies/distracting etc if you just ignore it...just tell her you sense a hostility and then she has to somehow respond to that..?..


...EDIT:..also, if it was one of your children..(I think you're a mum..?...)...you wouldn't ignore it if one of their teachers seemed hostile toward them...obviously because it isn't a very good way/appropriate way for a teacher to behave but also because you would be concerned about the effect it could have on their school work...this really is no different..doing this course is a big thing to you/important to you so don't allow any silliness from her spoil it for you...ask her about it and not only let her know how aware you are of it but make her look at her own actions and justify them...she's entitled to not like you and doesn't have to have a reason but as your tutor/mentor, she isn't entitled to openly express it or in any way make you feel uncomfortable or undermine you...

You know a part of me is thinking that any kind of confrontation here is going to make it worse. I can't help feeling that the best course of action is to fly beneath her radar until June. If she denies doing it, what do I do with that? If she implies it is all in my head, how do I prove otherwise? I'm obviously not going to involve the rest of the students so what evidence do I really have?

Funny you should bring up the part about my kids, because Greg also said something along those lines when my course started and I was getting grief from her. It's funny how you'll put up with things yourself, but won't let anyone do the same things to your kids.

[Ammi]

Originally Posted by JingleBitch

You know a part of me is thinking that any kind of confrontation here is going to make it worse. I can't help feeling that the best course of action is to fly beneath her radar until June. If she denies doing it, what do I do with that? If she implies it is all in my head, how do I prove otherwise? I'm obviously not going to involve the rest of the students so what evidence do I really have?

Funny you should bring up the part about my kids, because Greg also said something along those lines when my course started and I was getting grief from her. It's funny how you'll put up with things yourself, but won't let anyone do the same things to your kids.

..I think you've just got to go with how you feel is the best way to handle it because you're the one who is in the situation and have a feeling of how you think she'll react if you say anything...and she probably would just deny it all tbh, but she would then be aware of how aware you are about it and maybe realise that she could get into trouble or better 'be less obvious'..?...I think you've just got to see how it goes and if it's really becoming an issue for you and maybe detracting from your studies/course, then decide what to do then...

[Mystic Mock]

Bother me it does.