[Beso]

Originally Posted by Alf

I'd say difference is that they create different amounts of emotion in the child.

Smacking a child shocks the child, and they realise the seriousness of what they have done, while talking to them can go in one ear and out of the other, most children don't have a great attention span.

The seriousness.....like what for instance?

Being noisy on a bus? Not eating your greens?...hurling a games controller?


How serious should it be before a smacking.

[Denver]

Originally Posted by Kizzy

Failing to take in?... How am I to know that's what you were inferring :/

I still don't know if you were smacked or not, your mothers experience was horrible I appreciate why she wouldn't want to revisit that with her own kids no matter how traditional.

I was slapped but it was only once and when I was really naughty and it was only a slap that left a sting for a few minutes nothing more

[Kizzy]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

It's "political correctness" gone crazy not to hit another human being, one way smaller than you? My parents didn't hit me waaay before it was cool then, hipsters of their day

[chuff me dizzy]

Originally Posted by Adam.

I was slapped but it was only once and when I was really naughty and it was only a slap that left a sting for a few minutes nothing more

So was I and so were my children ,nothing wrong with that at all

[Alf]

Originally Posted by RichardG

there's nothing wrong with a quick slap every now and then, it never did me any harm. so long as it's a fairly rare occurrence, and so long as it's not too hard of course.

Correct.

For me, just knowing that a smack was a possibility, was a good enough deterrent for me not to do wrong.

[chuff me dizzy]

Originally Posted by Alf

Correct.

For me, just knowing that a smack was a possibility, was a good enough deterrent for me not to do wrong.

Same here, the "Look" always worked on both myself and my children ,but if it failed a slap on the bum worked

[Alf]

Originally Posted by parmnion

The seriousness.....like what for instance?

Being noisy on a bus? Not eating your greens?...hurling a games controller?


How serious should it be before a smacking.

Running into busy road, stealing, bullying and hitting other children, lighting fires and yes, sometimes for a tantrum.

[Beso]

Originally Posted by Alf

Running into busy road, stealing, bullying and hitting other children, lighting fires and yes, sometimes for a tantrum.

Imo, apart from the lighting fires smacking a child could cause them to do the other 4

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by Alf

Running into busy road, stealing, bullying and hitting other children, lighting fires and yes, sometimes for a tantrum.

how ironic

[Crimson Dynamo]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

how ironic

quiet you or you will get a clip round the ear

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by LeatherTrumpet

quiet you or you will get a clip round the ear

[Maru]

As long as it isn't abused, like a way to take our frustrations on our kids.. my mother is mentally/emotionally disabled and she used to punch and slap me when she was irritated with me. I grabbed her by the wrist the last time she did it when I was 14-16 and when she realized I had the courage ro push back, she never did it again... I agree with corporal punishment. I will hate doing it when I am a parent soon, but I think in general it taught consequences early on to me when used... that was thankfully not something that was overdone (い can tell it anguished my mother to do it)... however, I knew friends who had fathers who would overdo it, do it in such a way it felt almost vengeful hateful... it should always be done with love and a comversation after... but I think it should only be when they are younger... most ppl I knew "graduated" it when they showed maturity and self-responsibility and I think thats a good model... like many things in life, as long as its done in moderation, not daily occurence (ie only serious stuff), then its quote fine imo...

[Alf]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

how ironic

If you want to be silly about it, then I suppose it is.

I'd say it's parents teaching their children life lessons so that they grow up to be good, law-abiding, civilised, human beings.

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by Maru

As long as it isn't abused, like a way to take our frustrations on our kids.. my mother is mentally/emotionally disabled and she used to punch and slap me when she was irritated with me. I grabbed her by the wrist the last time she did it when I was 14-16 and she never did it again... I agree with corporal punishment. I will hate doing it when I am a parent soon, but I think in general it taught consequences early on to me when used... that was thankfully not something that was overdone (い can tell it anguished my mother to do it)... however, I knew friends who had fathers who would overdo it, do it in such a way it felt almost vengeful hateful... it should always be done with love and a comversation after... but I think it should only be when they are younger... most ppl I knew "graduated" it when they showed maturity and self-responsibility and I think thats a good model... like many things in life, as long as its done in moderation, not daily occurence (ie only serious stuff), then its quote fine imo...

I'm sorry Maru but that just sounds creepy as hell. Why on Earth is it ok and a sign of love and good parenting to hit a child, a little child specifically. Violence should never ever be the answer, I hope you change your mind on it

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by Alf

If you want to be silly about it, then I suppose it is.

I'd say it's parents teaching their children life lessons so that they grow up to be good, law-abiding, civilised, human beings.

Silly really? I will teach you hitting is wrong by......hitting you

[Alf]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

Silly really? I will teach you hitting is wrong by......hitting you

So will not spanking a child decrease violence, and guarentee the child grows up none violent?

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by Alf

So will not spanking a child decrease violence, and guarentee the child grows up none violent?

There's no guarantees in life Alf but violence is never the answer, especially violence against a little person who can't even defend themselves. I know that much.

[armand.kay]

If you cant raise a child without having to hit them in order to discipline them then maybe parenting just isn't for you. Imo most parents who smack their children do it out of either anger or frustration rather than them thinking of a rational, suitable punishment for what they've done.

[Crimson Dynamo]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

There's no guarantees in life Alf but violence is never the answer, especially violence against a little person who can't even defend themselves. I know that much.

Id rather be a child that got the odd smack for being naughty than years of passive aggression like ex Mrs LT got from her mother


still goes on now

utterly vile

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by LeatherTrumpet

Id rather be a child that got the odd smack for being naughty than years of passive aggression like ex Mrs LT got from her mother


still goes on now

utterly vile

Well neither is ideal really, is it?

[Crimson Dynamo]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

Well neither is ideal really, is it?

many times I thought about giving that auld battleaxe a boot right up her bony ar$se

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by LeatherTrumpet

many times I thought about giving that auld battleaxe a boot right up her bony ar$se

[armand.kay]

A more suitable punishment for a kid nowadays would be taking away privileges and technology/grounding for a week because honestly what is more likely to make you think twice about what you're doing a smack thats over in no time (and if your parents aren't completely abusive probably wont hurt that much) or knowing that you'll get all your privileges stripped away from you for a week?

[Alf]

Originally Posted by Niamh.

There's no guarantees in life Alf but violence is never the answer, especially violence against a little person who can't even defend themselves. I know that much.

But my argument on this isn't for abusive violence, I'm not for children to be beaten. A quick slap accros the arse when they've done wrong is not abuse, and if you think it is, then you're basically calling mine and a lot of other peoples parents abusive, and speaking for mine, I can tell you that my parents are not, and I love and respect them both very dearly. I'm 40 years old and I still don't smoke or swear infront of them, that's out of respect for them.

[Niamh.]

Originally Posted by Alf

But my argument on this isn't for abusive violence, I'm not for children to be beaten. A quick slap accros the arse when they've done wrong is not abuse, and if you think it is, then you're basically calling mine and a lot of other peoples parents abusive, and speaking for mine, I can tell you that my parents are not, and I love and respect them both very dearly. I'm 40 years old and I still don't smoke or swear infront of them, that's out of respect for them.

Hitting someone is a violent act though, I would never go to a personal level and call your parents anything Alf but I can't help how I feel about this subject, I do feel very strongly about it too.