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GypsyGoth · 25-02-2013, 11:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by reece(:

I've no idea where this assumption of a pansexual vs bisexual war has arisen from as it's nothing like that, "pansexuals" have a right to defend there feelings - that no one else possesses, but themselves. No one's hinting any discrimination from all bisexuals (again stereotyping).

Pansexuals are not under attack, and never have been, as far as I'm aware there never has been a struggle by pansexuals in society. And no one is saying that people who identify themselves as pansexuals shouldn't feel a certain way or should.

LemonJam · 25-02-2013, 11:42 PM

-throws eggs at the pansexual's houses-

Patrick · 25-02-2013, 11:48 PM

I'm Straight, but I find some guys hot - and have no problem saying that. Weird thing is, although I find them hot - the thought of even touching a lad would make me vomit.

lostalex · 25-02-2013, 11:53 PM

I know a lot of people who label themselves as pansexual/bisexual/genderqueer/ asexual that actually are just gay. they just don't want to be called gay because of all the negative stereotypes about gay people, so they think it sounds better to call themselves anything other than gay.

I'm not saying all people who use those other terms are doing that, but a lot of them are. Almost every gay person i've ever met went through a phase of telling people they were bisexual before they came out as gay.

Personally I don't care what people want to label themselves as. Whatever makes you happy.

Jack_ · 25-02-2013, 11:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lostalex

I know a lot of people who label themselves as pansexual/bisexual/genderqueer/ asexual that actually are just gay. they just don't want to be called gay because of all the negative stereotypes about gay people, so they think it sounds better to call themselves anything other than gay.

I'm not saying all people who use those other terms are doing that, but a lot of them are. Almost every gay person i've ever met went through a phase of telling people they were bisexual before they came out as gay.

There lies your problem. Your circle of friends and peers is not representative of the population of the world's bi, asexual and pansexual community, hence why the bit in bold doesn't really have much factual basis.

lostalex · 26-02-2013, 12:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jack_

There lies your problem. Your circle of friends and peers is not representative of the population of the world's bi, asexual and pansexual community, hence why the bit in bold doesn't really have much factual basis.

Actually they are just as representative as anyone else. Obviously everyone is an individual, so no one can represent any large group of people more than anyone else.

Mystic Mock · 26-02-2013, 12:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jack_

There lies your problem. Your circle of friends and peers is not representative of the population of the world's bi, asexual and pansexual community, hence why the bit in bold doesn't really have much factual basis.

Tbf I think Lostalex made a fair and reasonable post, as he does have a point that some people do lie about their sexuality, but obviously not all of them.

Jack_ · 26-02-2013, 12:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lostalex

Personally I don't care what people want to label themselves as. Whatever makes you happy.

Just noticed this. Kudos to you for respecting and being sensitive towards other people's feelings, that's all people need to be

MTVN · 26-02-2013, 12:04 AM

Eh I think people can overcomplicate sexuality sometimes, plus pansexuality is quite an obscure concept that the majority of people aren't familiar with it at all, it's understandable that people might express confusion at the need to distinguish it from bisexuality

Redway · 26-02-2013, 12:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lostalex

Actually they are just as representative as anyone else.

You make some good points and I would generally agree with the gist of your post, just that I'm slightly with Jack_ on this one. Personal experience isn't really a valid barometer on which to form nationally representative statements, but you're definitely right in saying that some people do substitute their homosexuality for other terms.

reece(: · 26-02-2013, 12:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MTVN

Eh I think people can overcomplicate sexuality sometimes, plus pansexuality is quite an obscure concept that the majority of people aren't familiar with it at all, it's understandable that people might express confusion at the need to distinguish it from bisexuality

Yes but there's a fine line between confusion and just down right disrespect/harsh judgement.

Mystic Mock · 26-02-2013, 12:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MTVN

Eh I think people can overcomplicate sexuality sometimes, plus pansexuality is quite an obscure concept that the majority of people aren't familiar with it at all, it's understandable that people might express confusion at the need to distinguish it from bisexuality

Agreed, it's only this thread that's helped me out to distinguish Bisexuality and Pansexuality.

Redway · 26-02-2013, 12:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by reece(:

Yes but there's a fine line between confusion and just down right disrespect/harsh judgement.

I'm sure Caitlin didn't mean to come across as disrespectful or anything. At first, I was unable to see the difference between 'bisexual' and 'pansexual'. You have to understand that people aren't always clued up about things when it's the first time they've come across it.

MTVN · 26-02-2013, 12:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by reece(:

Yes but there's a fine line between confusion and just down right disrespect/harsh judgement.

Don't think anyone was being deliberately disrespectful or anything, the posts in this thread alone show how difficult a term it is to define though and one that not everyone will agree on

Jack_ · 26-02-2013, 12:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MTVN

Eh I think people can overcomplicate sexuality sometimes, plus pansexuality is quite an obscure concept that the majority of people aren't familiar with it at all, it's understandable that people might express confusion at the need to distinguish it from bisexuality

There's absolutely nothing wrong with expressing confusion, enquiring, taking an interest in an issue, it's healthy. As I've already said, I find sexuality as a whole fascinating and in particular asexuality. But that doesn't give people the right to pass insulting judgements about other people's preferences and identity choices, let's not forget these are deep-rooted personal feelings people are experiencing, it's hard enough as it is already without people with no understanding whatsoever making insulting remarks. It's just ignorant.

reece(: · 26-02-2013, 12:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Redway

I'm sure Caitlin didn't mean to come across as disrespectful or anything. At first, I was unable to see the difference between 'bisexual' and 'pansexual'. You have to understand that people aren't always clued up about things when it's the first time they've come across it.

Yes but stereotyping as a hipster or wanting to be different can be taken the wrong way as well as all the jokey posts, I've for ages struggled with my feelings (still do) and it just doesn't help. And I'm not looking for sympathy, just a little respect.

Jack_ · 26-02-2013, 12:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MTVN

Don't think anyone was being deliberately disrespectful or anything, the posts in this thread alone show how difficult a term it is to define though and one that not everyone will agree on

Accusing somebody's sexuality of being a way of being 'different' or 'hipster' as if it's some kind of attention seeking joke is really belittling, insensitive and disrespectful.

Ninastar · 26-02-2013, 12:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Redway

I'm sure Caitlin didn't mean to come across as disrespectful or anything. At first, I was unable to see the difference between 'bisexual' and 'pansexual'. You have to understand that people aren't always clued up about things when it's the first time they've come across it.

Thank you.

Redway · 26-02-2013, 12:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by reece(:

Yes but stereotyping as a hipster or wanting to be different can be taken the wrong way as well as all the jokey posts, I've for ages struggled with my feelings (still do) and it just doesn't help. And I'm not looking for sympathy, just a little respect.

Wasn't it someone else who made that 'hipster' comment?

Jack_ · 26-02-2013, 12:19 AM

I couldn't give a **** how anybody tries to spin it, 'meh I just see it as a way of being 'different' is so patronising and disregards any feelings the person on the receiving end of it may have.

reece(: · 26-02-2013, 12:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Redway

Wasn't it someone else who made that 'hipster' comment?

Does it really matter who it was though?

GypsyGoth · 26-02-2013, 12:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jack_

I couldn't give a **** how anybody tries to spin it, 'meh I just see it as a way of being 'different' is so patronising and disregards any feelings the person on the receiving end of it may have.

For someone who is meant to like every gender on the planet, you don't seem all that tolerant or understanding.