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Chat and Games Looking for forum games, and completely off topic banter - this is your place! (includes Virtual Big Brother type forum games) |
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02-04-2015, 06:25 AM | #1 | |||
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Mock seems to be on a 'downer' lately, so I suggest another 'Joke Thread' to lift that spirit.
What does The Starship Enterprise and Andrex toilet paper have in common: Spoiler: |
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02-04-2015, 06:28 AM | #2 | ||
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Good one Kirk. It's not just Mock that needs cheering up It's a bit early in the day, but I'll try to add to this post later.
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02-04-2015, 07:13 PM | #3 | |||
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Jessica Meuse was robbed.
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Haha a good post Kirk, and thanks for the thread.
What does Ed Milliband and David Cameron have in common? They're both incompetent.
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KRO! |
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02-04-2015, 09:30 PM | #4 | |||
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02-04-2015, 09:31 PM | #5 | |||
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The Italian Job
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02-04-2015, 09:38 PM | #6 | |||
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Senior Member
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Kyle: "Can I buy you a drink"?
Girl: "Sorry, but I've had my limit for tonight. If I drink too much alcohol it's bad for my legs". Kyle: "Why does it make them swell? Girl: "No. It makes them spread." |
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02-04-2015, 09:57 PM | #7 | |||
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Mr Rocket League
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Quote:
Kirk is in his prayer chamber talking to God. "God, how long is a million years?" God answers, "To me my boy, it's about a minute." "God, how much is a million dollars?" "To me lad, it's a penny." Kirk strokes his chin for a second "God, may I have a penny?" ........ ........ "Wait a minute." |
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02-04-2015, 10:02 PM | #8 | |||
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Senior Member
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Quote:
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02-04-2015, 10:10 PM | #9 | |||
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You know my methods
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Why did humpty dumpy push his girlfriend off the wall?
He wanted to see her crack |
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02-04-2015, 10:19 PM | #10 | |||
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Jessica Meuse was robbed.
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What does Aston Villa and myself have in common? We both can't score.
What was seen as a big trait for Jimmy Saville? He liked to kid around. What organ do some people live in the UK? Liverpool.
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KRO! |
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02-04-2015, 10:23 PM | #11 | |||
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Senior Member
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02-04-2015, 10:24 PM | #12 | |||
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02-04-2015, 10:28 PM | #13 | |||
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Jessica Meuse was robbed.
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What do people say about people giving cheek? Just insert it inbetween.
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KRO! |
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02-04-2015, 10:45 PM | #14 | |||
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02-04-2015, 10:54 PM | #15 | |||
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Jessica Meuse was robbed.
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What does Phil Collins and The Bible have in common? They both was apart of Genesis.
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KRO! |
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02-04-2015, 10:57 PM | #16 | |||
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Senior Member
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Kid pushing a wheelbarrow asked his dad "Is it true God is everywhere dad" dad replies" Yes,son,God is everywhere",kid says "Well I wish he'de get out of this barrow it's bloody heavy"
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RIP Pyramid, Andyman ,Kerry and Lex xx https://www.facebook.com/JamesBulgerMT/?fref=photo "If slaughterhouses had glass walls, most people would be vegetarian" |
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02-04-2015, 10:58 PM | #17 | |||
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Senior Member
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RIP Pyramid, Andyman ,Kerry and Lex xx https://www.facebook.com/JamesBulgerMT/?fref=photo "If slaughterhouses had glass walls, most people would be vegetarian" |
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02-04-2015, 11:00 PM | #18 | |||
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Jessica Meuse was robbed.
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__________________
KRO! |
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03-04-2015, 07:57 AM | #19 | |||
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03-04-2015, 08:02 AM | #20 | |||
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Senior Member
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Little Billy walks in on his parents as they're having sex in the missionary position. Mum is really embarrassed and says:
"It's OK Billy, Daddy's just pumping me back up a bit, I'm a little bit deflated this morning". Billy replies: "Woah, you must have a serious puncture Mam, I heard Mr Collins from next door pumping you up for most of the night while Dad was at work." |
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03-04-2015, 08:27 AM | #21 | |||
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Jessica Meuse was robbed.
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Quote:
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KRO! |
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03-04-2015, 10:59 AM | #22 | |||
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Mr Rocket League
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Why did Mock cross the road?
Spoiler: |
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03-04-2015, 11:06 AM | #23 | |||
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The Italian Job
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I love this thread. It's cheering me up so much!
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03-04-2015, 11:25 AM | #24 | |||
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You know my methods
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My wife asked me what my plans are for Easter?
I said: The same as Jesus', disappear Friday, show up Monday. |
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03-04-2015, 11:25 AM | #25 | |||
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You know my methods
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I was horrified to hear during the leaders debate Nigel Farage quoting the number of foreigners coming here to be treated for HIV.
Bloody foreigners coming here taking our jabs. |
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