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Tom4784 · 10-09-2015, 11:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kizzy

We don't know her so we can't know her reasoning can we? :/

She could be a ball breaker she could also be the victim of years of sexual harassment, who knows...
Waiting for #pervshaming to be a 'thing'.

We can only judge by what's written.

lostalex · 10-09-2015, 11:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dezzy

We can only judge by what's written.

and what he Wrote, is clearly deserving of being shamed.

Toy Soldier · 10-09-2015, 11:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cherie

As Kizzy says maybe it was the final straw?

Maybe, but that would suggest she has handled it better with other perves in the past, but this one was just one too many. That doesn't make it right. Nothing he said was aggressive, and it was one message not relentless pestering. The fact that OTHER people have done the same doesn't make it right for her to take it all out on this one. She could have handled it discreetly and still written about it in anger without naming and shaming one man.

Or, if she really felt it important to name and shame, and it was because of this sort of thing happening frequently, she should have named and shamed ALL of the men who got her to this point.

Basically... I don't see how it's fair or just for one person to take the flak for himself AND everyone else, with his face and name all over it, whilst the others who played just as big a part in getting her to breaking point (hypothetically, we don't even know if that's the case) sit at home safe in anonymity.

Also, we don't know if this man has sent similar messages to others in the past and been told that it's nice to be complimented. He might have messaged Livia the week before, and have been hoping for similar success.

Cherie · 10-09-2015, 11:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dezzy

Such naïveté.

I never said she wasn't within her rights to nip it in the bud so I'm not sure what you've been reading to suggest I haven't but nothing she has done since will benefit anyone in her situation, she's took the opportunity to make some money from it and that's all.

Can you stop with the personal remarks? It makes it very difficult to engage in any debate when you start getting personal. I have said my piece and refuse to be drawn into this any further with you.

Cherie · 10-09-2015, 11:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Toy Soldier

Maybe, but that would suggest she has handled it better with other perves in the past, but this one was just one too many. That doesn't make it right. Nothing he said was aggressive, and it was one message not relentless pestering. The fact that OTHER people have done the same doesn't make it right for her to take it all out on this one. She could have handled it discreetly and still written about it in anger without naming and shaming one man.

Or, if she really felt it important to name and shame, and it was because of this sort of thing happening frequently, she should have named and shamed ALL of the men who got her to this point.

Basically... I don't see how it's fair or just for one person to take the flak for himself AND everyone else, with his face and name all over it, whilst the others who played just as big a part in getting her to breaking point (hypothetically, we don't even know if that's the case) sit at home safe in anonymity.

Also, we don't know if this man has sent similar messages to others in the past and been told that it's nice to be complimented. He might have messaged Livia the week before, and have been hoping for similar success.

maybe he has had success in the past, but maybe he has also been a bit of a pest, only she knows the full story, I can't see that she did anything wrong in naming him.

Kizzy · 10-09-2015, 12:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dezzy

We can only judge by what's written.

Personally I never judge.

Tom4784 · 10-09-2015, 12:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lostalex

and what he Wrote, is clearly deserving of being shamed.

When did I say he wasn't?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cherie

Can you stop with the personal remarks? It makes it very difficult to engage in any debate when you start getting personal. I have said my piece and refuse to be drawn into this any further with you.

I've not made any personal remarks, you made an extremely naive comment and I pointed it out. You keep making it personal by trying to derail the topic any time anyone challenges you.

Kizzy · 10-09-2015, 12:13 PM

I just hope her actions don't come back to lightly tap her on the arse......

Kizzy · 10-09-2015, 12:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dezzy

I've not made any personal remarks, you made an extremely naive comment and I pointed it out. You keep making it personal by trying to derail the topic any time anyone challenges you.

Who are you to suggest anyones opinion is naive?

Tom4784 · 10-09-2015, 12:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kizzy

Who are you to suggest anyones opinion is naive?

Who are you to say I can't?

It is naive (and completely and utterly hyperbolic) to say that this woman has 'effectively ensured no one else will be approached in that way'. It's not an insult, i'm just commenting on the post. Whether you accept that or not is of little consequence to anyone.

Toy Soldier · 10-09-2015, 12:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kizzy

Personally I never judge.

Livia · 10-09-2015, 12:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dezzy

Such naïveté.

I never said she wasn't within her rights to nip it in the bud so I'm not sure what you've been reading to suggest I haven't but nothing she has done since will benefit anyone in her situation, she's took the opportunity to make some money from it and that's all.

And that's the closest to the truth I think we're going to get.

I've talked about how hard it is working in a male-dominated environment and got nothing but ridicule from some of the people who're now outraged for this poor shrinking violet. She's a barrister... she shouldn't get so emotional about trivia. By taking it public she's made herself look vindictive and small.

Cherie · 10-09-2015, 12:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dezzy

When did I say he wasn't?

I've not made any personal remarks, you made an extremely naive comment and I pointed it out. You keep making it personal by trying to derail the topic any time anyone challenges you.

See my response to TS which sits this point of view on its arse.

Tom4784 · 10-09-2015, 12:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cherie

See my response to TS which sits this point of view on its arse.

Except it doesn't because you keep assuming that I'm defending the man when I'm not. He's in the wrong for acting inappropriate and should be dragged up on it and she's in the wrong for being completely opportunistic which does nothing for the cause she claims to fight for.

arista · 10-09-2015, 12:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kizzy

It was a silly sexist message to post on her linked in, what was he thinking?

Knickers

LeatherTrumpet · 10-09-2015, 12:39 PM

the way it probably went was he was out for a boozy lunch and came back and did a bit of browsing and chanced his arm.

I agree with Kizzy that perhaps it was one too many "compliments" in that profession

But, she should have been far cleverer - if she wants to get on in that career, than what she did. Now she is damaged goods and its a tight nit community.

Vanessa · 10-09-2015, 12:41 PM

She got upest, because he complimented her appearance? Seems over the top to me.

Livia · 10-09-2015, 12:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LeatherTrumpet

the way it probably went was he was out for a boozy lunch and came back and did a bit of browsing and chanced his arm.

I agree with Kizzy that perhaps it was one too many "compliments" in that profession

But, she should have been far cleverer - if she wants to get on in that career, than what she did. Now she is damaged goods and its a tight nit community.

Kizzy knows as much about the legal profession as you do, Trumpet.

She knew what going public with this would do... and if that message sent her over the top she should think about a change of direction, professionally.

Northern Monkey · 10-09-2015, 12:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LeatherTrumpet

to be fair she should have made a full body pic and then we could at least see her tits and arse

My intuition says they would be good.

But I bet if the guy had been 28 and as fit as a butchers dog and a lawyer she would have been all .....

Exactly.I've had women compliment me at work and i did'nt go running to HR about it.Everyone(almost) likes a compliment.

Kizzy · 10-09-2015, 12:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dezzy

Who are you to say I can't?

It is naive (and completely and utterly hyperbolic) to say that this woman has 'effectively ensured no one else will be approached in that way'. It's not an insult, i'm just commenting on the post. Whether you accept that or not is of little consequence to anyone.

I Never said you couldn't did I?

The man in question before he makes comments of that nature again no doubt so it served it's purpose.

Kizzy · 10-09-2015, 12:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Livia

Kizzy knows as much about the legal profession as you do, Trumpet.

She knew what going public with this would do... and if that message sent her over the top she should think about a change of direction, professionally.

Is this site for the opinions of all or just those with some direct link to the subject matter?

Livia · 10-09-2015, 12:47 PM

I wonder how the other barristers in her chambers feel about her? I'd be interested to know. Hope her clerk's a woman who's hyper-sensitive to compliments or she's on all the sh1t jobs.